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miticantenslaved -> Confessions of a Witch and slave (1/3/2006 7:18:12 PM)
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Confessions of a Witch and slave (or, Everything I need to Know I learned from Horrid Experience)
To most of T/those who know miti, she is slave. To O/others she knows, miti is Witch, as well. Yes, Witch....with a Capital Dubya.
miti has been successful at blending Witch with woman all of her adult life. When blending Witch and woman and slave, things can get a bit messy...*snorts unattractively and cackles a bit*
While Witch and woman (read Queen) get along famously, the poor slave is often looked down upon by her *internal* S/sisters. At times, T/they even go as far as to try to wrest control from the slave.
A slave in control, Y/you say? Well yes....a slave is her own best teacher, mentor and guide. A slave with no sense of self actually has very little to give Master. This "sense of self" also includes self-control. Anyone can be an automation...and many are. There is nothing wrong with this...as that famous Used Car Salesman often said....."There's an ass for every seat" miti wisely adds....*just be sure not to fart*
On to what miti has learned and/or pondered as slave/Witch/woman....
Things to Never Ever Allow the Witch to Handle
1) Housekeeping: this should at ALL times be handled by the slave/woman. the Witch will merely cast a Glamoury over the household and be Good to Go. (miti will not discuss the Banishing Entities From the Refrigerator spell) (or the Enslavement and Care of Dust Bunnies)
2) Visits by Dreaded Relatives/Children: the Witch is NOT allowed to do a fast Banishing Pentagram at the door, nor is She allowed to nail ANY Dead Creatures over the entry. (miti will not discuss the freeze-dried Wolf Pee on the Stoop spell)
3) Outdoor Activities: the Witch is NOT allowed to cast a Glamoury causing the Crusty Neighbor Children to see the Loch Ness Monster in their wading pool so She can go outdoors and sunbathe naked. (miti will not discuss the Garden Gnome Changeling spell)
4) Taking the Car in For Service: the Witch must never, ever Slow Time, nor Cause the Other Customers to not see Her or Her car as She Slips it Into the Garage before their appointments. (under no circumstance will miti discuss the Mechanic Growing a Pig Snout spell)
5) Doing the Weekly Marketing: the Witch must never ever cast a You Don't See Me spell when bored at the checkout, and simply walk out. this is higly unethical and very bad for the economy. (miti does not like to talk about the Talking Cabbage at Checkout Wreaking Mass Havoc spell)
6) Punishments: the Witch is NOT allowed to cause Master to quite strangely put down any Instrument of Punishment that He may have in His hand while looking at U/us. (miti shudders and will NOT discuss the Droopy Paddle spell)
7) Other Slaves Having an Interest: the Witch must never, EVER cast an Aversion Spell on Master, making Him as attractive as a Three-Toed Sloth. (miti will not discuss the emergency auxillary, My...She Looks Tore Up from the Floor Up spell)
8) Polyamorous Relationships: never allow the Witch around these. it is guaranteed that the first time sister goes into the bedroom alone with Master....S/someone is going to come back out Very Disappointed, Penis No Longer Working, Voice Much Higher, Sporting Man Boobies, having a Large Mouth Bass Fetish and covered with boils and pestilence. Lo and behold, the Witch will also be quite gone, taking Her sisters, slave and woman, with Her. (miti will not mention the dog and car) (and cash) (and ALL of Masters clean Underwear) *whistles innocently....the clean Underwear gets Em every time*
9) Pleasing Other Masters: upon occasion, and with Some Masters there will be a requirement to Please Another, under Masters orders. under no circumstance must the Witch Cause a Disruption or cause an Erotically Fulfilling Dream while She gives Herself a Pedicure instead. (miti hesitates to mention the Extremely Dismaying "It's Got Teeth!" Glamoury)
10) and finally, at No Time should the Witch be allowed to discuss the Days Events with Master on His arrival Home. The Wielding of Magick requires the Witch to be Brutally Honest with Herself and O/others. She is only tempered and softened by the woman and slave.
A Very Sad Example of Item 10:
*greets Master with a smile, holding an earthern cup of cold paga as He enters His Space. she softly pads to His favourite chair, kneeling at the left arm, waiting for Him to be seated. As He seats Himself, she offers Him up His paga with a winsome smile. He takes the paga and smiles down at her. Softly playing with her long, silky tresses, he asks her, "And what has My slut done today?" the Witch answers...."W/we are glad to see You home my Master, W/we have had a very busy day. As You know it rained all day and W/we were just a trifle bored. After a morning spent Plotting World Domination, W/we were visited by the gas meter reader Man. He unfortunately insulted O/our intelligence, so W/we cast the Dumb as a Box of Rocks spell on him. He was quite happy to do ALL of O/our chores while W/we watched cartoons and ate crispy rice. W/we released him after his office called looking for him and he finished O/our ironing."
"Afterward, W/we napped until W/we were awakened by the Neighbor Children. W/we were not quite finished with O/our Nap and were a tad cranky. W/we were made even crankier by the TV crews, coming to view the Child-Eating Trampoline and Swingset of Doom. The TV crews finally left when they learned of the Dog-Eating Disposable Containers in the next block. W/we think W/we may have overdone the "satisfied burp". " she sighs heavily...."You will see it on the 6 o'clock News, my Master." she smiles brightly up at Him and asks sweetly...."and How was Your day, Master?"
so......ya wanna be Witch/slave? miti wishes you all the luck in the world ! as for her, W/we bump along. when W/we fall, Master picks U/us up and dusts U/us off. when W/we just cannot deal, Master deals for U/us. Goddess Bless this Man who would take such an irrepressible and irreverent creature...and in return....He has a wonderous creature who shines His Halo with love and respect....always making sure His Own Horns are adequately covered *winks*
~~~~disclaimer~~~~by writing this, miti does not admit to, or even suggest the above events have (or ever will have) taken place
*smoochies* and a Blessed Be to A/all.... miti
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