RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (Full Version)

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SavageFaerie -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/9/2006 3:35:15 PM)

LOL Cin I second that just could not come up with anything either.

dont ya hate being bested?

But the sausage is of some interest. Maybe they just were not compatible




JustaDom -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 7:14:41 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazybutterfly

I believe there is a question about the type of sausage awaiting in your inbox, Sir.  ;)


I cook with turkey sausage.  It is better for you, has far fewer calories and is just as filling so you can have more of it more often.  I've also heard it tastes better than the plain kind that is made from pigs but I wouldn't know personally, I'm not a fan of sausage myself.

Joe
P.S.  I know what you were intending to ask.  Note that you actually asked what type




juliaoceania -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:15:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Vancouver_cinful

Joe, I tried to quote a relevant section of your post but found that the whole damn thing was so clever, and coffee-sputterable, that I just couldn't do it.

Kudos! What a brilliant thesis on pasta-submissology.


I agree, we all should be interested in "safe pasta", hopefully the silicone lube will also help with the clogging artery problem you discussed earlier? Silicone probably is the logical choice.

And yes I am going to work on my research paper tonight and tomorrow, I just got home and since Sinergy does not have Word on his PC as of yet I wanted to wait until I got home to work on it. There are so many good theories I want to mention as many as I can and  of course Sinergy has to read it before I post my findings.




LaTigresse -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:49:58 AM)

It appears we have concluded that rigatoni is the most submissive of pastas.

My personal struggle tends to be lasagna noodles. Those pesky things try to jump out of the pan, stick to the pan, jump out of the colander into the sink, EVEN......get the brattiness of this !!!.........they have even tried sliding out of my hands!! I got so frustrated one time I almost cooked some spagetti noodles to beat the lasagna noodles into submission with. Fortunately my dog Bella was on hand to snatch the wayward lasagna noodle off the floor ending its life of topping from.......below........for good.




SCORPIOXXX -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 9:15:20 AM)

Being Italian born and raised, I take great umbrage at joy's blaming of Italians for Synergy's pasta problems... Indeed, as the pasta recognizes my inherent Italian DOMliness, it immediately cowers and trembles in utmost submission!!!

You must stare the pasta down from the very moment you take it off the shelf at the store -- recognizing that like all things Italian, the pasta has character and, as with any budding, worthwhile sub/slave, it must be taught its proper role.

BTW, as an asidem: frozen gnocchi on a string make great anal beads -- you can thaw them just a bit (or coat them in olive oil) for a more slippery and easier insertion...




Sinergy -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 7:58:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tamerofwild1s

*walks in holds my pasta pan upside down* . dam . alla da pasta came out . why not try using a little olive oil when you cook you pasta next time . it'll teach those unruly pastas whose boss .. consider it a EVOO .... whats the word .. hmmm .. of yea enema . lmfao
 
 


I always use olive oil.  Extra-virgin no less.

Although what George Clooney said, "Who needs 14 virgins anyway?  Give me 3 professionals any day" makes me think I
might not be doing this right.

I personally am starting to suspect that the tortellini was upset because I was using the same cook pot which has had tortellini and ziti and angel hair pasta come and go over the years.  Jealousy and
clinginess are not personality traits I find very attractive.

But that is just me, and I could be wrong.

Sinergy




missturbation -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:01:50 PM)

I'm sorry i have kept this in way too long. A thread about pasta being more domly than a dom and a dom who gets someone to write an essay on it. With respect funny posts or not this is pathetic.




Sinergy -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:02:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

It appears we have concluded that rigatoni is the most submissive of pastas.

My personal struggle tends to be lasagna noodles. Those pesky things try to jump out of the pan, stick to the pan, jump out of the colander into the sink, EVEN......get the brattiness of this !!!.........they have even tried sliding out of my hands!! I got so frustrated one time I almost cooked some spagetti noodles to beat the lasagna noodles into submission with. Fortunately my dog Bella was on hand to snatch the wayward lasagna noodle off the floor ending its life of topping from.......below........for good.



I would suggest that the way to get your lasagna noodle to submit is to not provide it any warm up prior to play.  This just makes it all limp and whiny while you attempt to make it bend to your will.

Put its hard-assed inflexible self in the pan, cover it with spinach / ricotta / mozarella cheese blend with a couple of eggs in it, then ladle copious (and somewhat watery, the noodle will soak it all up) sauce over the whole thing.

Throw its Smart Assed Macaroni-wannabe self in the oven.

Viola, the pasta will be in sub space on your plate in no time.

Just me, could be wrong, etc.

Sinergy




juliaoceania -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:03:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I'm sorry i have kept this in way too long. A thread about pasta being more domly than a dom and a dom who gets someone to write an essay on it. With respect funny posts or not this is pathetic.


Isn't that the point?




ravn -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:06:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SCORPIOXXX

Being Italian born and raised, I take great umbrage at joy's blaming of Italians for Synergy's pasta problems... Indeed, as the pasta recognizes my inherent Italian DOMliness, it immediately cowers and trembles in utmost submission!!!

You must stare the pasta down from the very moment you take it off the shelf at the store -- recognizing that like all things Italian, the pasta has character and, as with any budding, worthwhile sub/slave, it must be taught its proper role.

BTW, as an asidem: frozen gnocchi on a string make great anal beads -- you can thaw them just a bit (or coat them in olive oil) for a more slippery and easier insertion...


i'm never ever going to be able to eat gnocchi again without envisioning this.....yucky




missturbation -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:06:56 PM)

What that its pathetic?
Or that a dom would feel threatened by a pan of pasta?




Sinergy -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:08:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I'm sorry i have kept this in way too long. A thread about pasta being more domly than a dom and a dom who gets someone to write an essay on it. With respect funny posts or not this is pathetic.


The thread may be pathetic, but you are both reading it and posting a response to it.

Personally, I tend to take things in life with as much of a sense of humor as I can muster.  I could have posted it in Ask A Master or General BDSM Discussion...

Just me, could be wrong, etc.

Sinergy




missturbation -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:16:47 PM)

Im just trying to understand a Master who has nothing better to teach or get someone to study than the domliness of pasta. Forgive me but im curious is all. I find some of the posts very funny - thats why i have read it.




wantitnow569 -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:23:21 PM)

*sighs and just shakes head sadly*.... i think You are all missing the point here!!!!! The noodle needs to be taught a lesson here.... i have a plan and a theory, here's what You need to do: next time i say when You are starting to cook the nice little pasta You warn it, and tell it that You are terrible and dreadfully sorry but that it's time You teach it a lesson... And then i say tie it up and make it watch as You put all of the other pasta's down the garbage disposal....and laugh while You are doing this!!!! waa haa haa haa haa..




juliaoceania -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 8:27:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

What that its pathetic?
Or that a dom would feel threatened by a pan of pasta?


First of all I guess you would not understand the whole scenario as it took place.. you see Sinergy makes me laugh more than any other person I have ever known.. and I like funny people around so that is saying something. He could moonlight at comedy clubs easily.

Here is the scenario:

Im sitting on the floor in the kitchen in front of the refrig cleaning the bottom shelves because I just do this when a fridge has been stored away. I am watching Sinergy with my cow eyes and gazing at his mastery with kitchen utensils as he prepares a wonderful pesto pasta with scallops. I turn my attention back to scrubbing the fridge and I hear Sinergy express his morpheme (look it up in the CM search engine for a detailed description). I turn to see what the trouble is and he exclaims that the noodles will not obey him... I try to comfort him by asking "What's up with that, Daddy?" and he tells me he needs me to find out for him....I mean what else would I do when he goes out every day and slays Al Qaeda and works all day to making zombie sex slaves wearing silver jumpsuits for his volcano lair? I mean he promised me one of these sex slaves to help finish with the unpacking the next time I visit after all! I mean he can't be expected to do EVERYTHING, like find out why pasta will not obey him.. HE NEEDS ME DAMMIT

... being the "natural" submissive that I am.. I have to find out "What's up with that?" It isn't rocket science (well not exactly but I have this deep seated fear I may need some equations for the density of pasta, the weight of the pasta, and the pull of gravity.. the horror, I never took physics 101 dammit!)\

Once you read my findings you will see how serious this all is (or isn't)





Gauge -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/10/2006 9:12:20 PM)

I have thought this over some more and I think you may have accidentally bought Microsoft Pasta 3.0 Professional Edition and not downloaded the updates for your pan before you installed your pasta. It clearly states on the Microsoft website that to prepare your pan for Pasta Pro 3.0 that first you must rub a CD with olive oil and insert into the CD drive an 1 hour. If your pan does not have a CD ROM drive then it is available in floppy disk, but you have to be careful because the files are large and this could take extra time.

Once you have done the olive oil on the CD thing, then you must clean out all your pan's temp files... you know, the stuff left behind when you run Spaghetti 8.0 and Manicotti 2.0 Home Edition. Also, it is wise to defrag your pan in order to make sure that your pan's files are contiguous and not that it is fragmented and slow.

Now that you have done all of this, it is time to boot your pan into Safe Mode with Networking. You see, the networking will assist you while CyberSauce runs in the background. Take Microsoft Pasta Pro 3.0 and insert into your prepared pan. Follow the instructions on the packet and then reboot your pan normally. If you have done everything properly your Pasta Pro 3.0 won't crash your pan and freeze to the inside of it. Of course, being that it is a Microsoft product, Pasta Pro 3.0 will have to be updated constantly in order to keep hackers from exploiting weaknesses in the programming code. It would also be a good idea to buy an al FornoWall program to prevent hackers from accessing your pan.

If more technical help is needed for your Pasta Pro 3 feel free to email me.




girl4you2 -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/11/2006 2:15:00 AM)

or you could have gotten a mac pan; with tiger running it, the pasta wouldn't think of sticking, and you don't need to worry about malevolent hackers trying to break into the system and mucking with the pan.




twicehappy -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/11/2006 4:52:05 AM)

Do as the good Italian mom's do and buy the lasagna noodles you do not need to precook. You simply lay them in the pan and they cook as your Lasagna bakes, perfect everytime.

Or do what Jewel and i do, buy all the ingredients and leave them on the counter and wait for Scooter to take the hint.

We are sooooo spoiled........

He makes great Italian(especially for a blond haired blue eyed Scandinavian/Irish mix).




missturbation -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/11/2006 5:27:56 AM)

I can see where the scenario comes from - maybe even understand it. My sense of humour has gone awol though so please excuse my frequent mood swings.




KenDckey -> RE: Dominance And The Inanimate Object (8/11/2006 8:03:49 AM)

OK   I couldn't take it any longer.   A true pasta story.    Take some past and sort it into 3 piles.   Using food color the biggest pile with yellow, the next biggest pile with red (not a big pile either) and an even smaller pile with green.   Chop it up till it is fairly fine (like you chewed it up).  Put in lots of butter so it is nice and slimmey.    hehehehehe    make vomit sounds where no one can see you.    hehehehehhe

SERVE.   AND EAT IT YOURSELF

People think you are eating vomit.    Tell everyone how good it is.   Most people well either dry heave or throw up themselves.   (saw this done when I was stationed in Berlin Germany to a "POW" being interrogated during a war game.   The POW puked nicely)

Oh and you can't blame the pasta problem on the poor Italians.   Marco Polo imported it from China and the Italians just figured out much better ways to use it.    And we all know how the Chinese are - making big nukes and selling them just to piss us off.   I think they brain washed the  pasta.   We should take the good pasta and send it over their to straighten out the brainwashed pasta.




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