unsung
Posts: 183
Joined: 12/23/2006
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My thoughts spring from the nuiances of this board in general. There are many questions on definitions and many responses that suggest that people chose what works for them and their partner as really the relationships are about and between the dynamics of the individuals and a small exent affected by the community if they chose to engage in that social setting.
With that said, it leaves me wondering if it is stated that it to each their own and labels do not apply, how is anyone in a position to say that the actions of an individual where wrong, and especially when the extent of the dynamic is unknown including the personalities that are involved. Is there are standardized set of rules that submissives, slaves, doms etc follow; a universal protocol ? I would bid to differ if anyone stated yes there was, as I have spoken to a number of d types and each has been different and each has different expectations. Not one has been the same and this is true for submissives and slaves as well.
The thread that triggered this is due to how quickly the actions of the submissive was called on and determined ungreatful, with little hesitation as well. Surely we must have standards in the world of economics, it is the settling that allows junk to be placed on the shelves for us consumers. And because a d type goes to some degree of work to provide a gift and because we are classed as submissive accept a lower standard just because? I don't know if you can see the irony I see here. We want the best of partners for a mate yet we seem to allow a lesser standard of acceptance.
Another thing that I find most annoying is how quickly the judgement on whom the finger is being pointed rather on the messenger. If I was to come to this board and pose a question of concern I certainly would not do so without any previous thought regarding the issue and what and how I may have party to the troubles. Like the threads 'i have been dumped and don't know why', surely rather than critizing the dumper and pointing our fingers at them whom are not present to defend their position, we look at the dumped (which a few do do) and place the focus to that individual for their growth rather just another pick me up thread on what a terrible person the dumper is. Yes, I am not overly sympathetic to fallouts as much as I would like to be; as I have found that the vast majority of fallouts have been the result of both parties involved aka both are at fault, hence the sympathy train short. I can give dozens upon dozens of examples from my own experience as well as others however I am sure you understand the idea I am getting at.
If someone is or states they are submissive, they are in their own fashion. I am different than most, and seek something slightly different than others around me. How I deal with things is different than others, and there is no universal right or wrong in my dealings as long as I am around others that are acceptant and knowledgeable enough to make judgement of me the way I am. Hence do not judge me until you have enough background information to do so informatively; which I might state is one most notorious hypocracies on this board. If labels do not exist, how can you define me or others and how can you say what is right and what is wrong? You can't not logically anyhow, and in this I find irony. I was using me as an example julieaoceania not stating you are doing the above; just putting myself and you into the lines to explain the logic I have been pondering here and for that reason alone, rather than some other unsuspecting victim.
< Message edited by unsung -- 5/12/2007 3:26:38 AM >
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Is there possibly a double standard here? Hell yes I s... - 
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? It is so important that you live your life the way you choose to. Coming here to read and/or seek advice is fine but if you are going to actually pattern your life around what you glean here, you're going to need meds. There are those who will agree with you and those who will tell you you don't even have a clue as to the best way to lead your own life. 
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