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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 1:07:56 PM

earthycouple

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I do my best to speak deeply of my own experience which means revealing my mistakes and my weaknesses. I think dignity comes in as how you express yourself and how you treat others in your past.

I ditto this. I was less than dignified when I called someone a jackass in another post. revealing my weaknesses is not undignified.

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D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 1:55:57 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
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this slave does not come here for advice, she goes to Master for that.

this slave doesn't come here for commiseration, either, as that would necessitate that this slave would first feel and value some type of camaradarie of others here who empathize with her.

this slave comes here to learn and share, at Master's discretion.

the information or advice this slave has to offer is based on personal and/or past experiences. for her, that alone is exposing oneself...another's perception (other than Master's) that whatever she shares isn't dignified really doesn't enter into the equation until someone else brings it up or is offended by it.

for instance, there have been threads regarding a slave or submissive's annoyance or contempt of one's Master, the need for a "break" or to fill oneself with interests independent of Master in order to be a healthy, happy servant...this slave has attempted to add her opinion that she doesn't have these issues or needs, as not every human does...not as an attempt to portray an idealized image of anything, just reporting this slave's experiences or opinion.

(in reply to dawntreader)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 1:57:53 PM

happypervert

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Joined: 5/11/2004
From: Scranton, PA
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quote:

When posting about a personal issue do you consider your own dignity before exposing what some could consider “your ugly side”?

Sure I do, though if it is something that I know would expose my ugly side then there are some times when I decide to just not make the post at all, and other times I just don't give a damn.

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"Get a bicycle. You will not regret it if you live." . . . Mark Twain

(in reply to dawntreader)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 2:05:50 PM

ICGsteve

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For me personal dignity is pretty much the same as "the degree to which I revel in the fact that I am an individual" What others think, or whether what I am doing or revealing to others is my "good" side or my "dark" side matters not at all. I know myself, I accept all of who I am regardless of mine or others moral or ethical judgments about the different parts of me, it is all good. So long as I know this my dignity is not challenged.

I learned this from Thomas Moore's teaching on the "shadow", a concept that he got from Jung.

(in reply to happypervert)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 2:08:30 PM

shyinini

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Joined: 5/4/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dawntreader

Why would "dignity" be considered dishonest? Why would "emotional honesty" not be considered dignified? What characteristics of a weakness make it "ugly" Can a person not present themselves as dignified and not be labeled a perfectionist?

I like Mrs.Merc and Michael 's responses.
There are times I am frustrated withthe rant or the turn of the thread. I do tend to be more serious on forums, sometimes I come up with something I think is funny, but I know only real life people who enjoy my humor. (Not that you are all not real.)

I come to hash through a problem...from many perspectives, altho I have been accused of being narrow minded. I dont give a rip cause they have no idea where I come from...

If I put something out in public, I hope that one hundred days from now I will be able to stand by it ... in grace and gratitide for moral character and core values taht make me who I am.

I dont want or need to be a prefectionist. There are plenty others on this board who think they are. If I show a weakness, there is dignity in it for I have spoken about who I am ~ weakness and strength, and I am NOT afraid to say I was wrong, or ya know, I know I am right.

_____________________________

With grace and gratitude, I am owned.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you
is the only Man truly worthy of being called Sir.

(in reply to dawntreader)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 2:34:52 PM

dawntreader

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Joined: 11/23/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: shyinini

If I put something out in public, I hope that one hundred days from now I will be able to stand by it ... in grace and gratitide for moral character and core values that make me who I am.

If I show a weakness, there is dignity in it for I have spoken about who I am ~ weakness and strength, and I am NOT afraid to say I was wrong, or ya know, I know I am right.

Thankyou to everyone for your replies :-) i have found little "pearls" in everyone's thoughts regardless of your views...

Personally, i share shyinini's view and would add simplymichael's thoughts as well on the actual expression of my thoughts and my consideration and treatment of others.

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to shyinini)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 5:31:18 PM

CreativeDominant

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dawntreader

There have been many threads recently that have caused me to contemplate personal dignity.
I would like to pose a question or three to both sides of the kneel, regardless of the more specific identifiers we assume for ourselves.
When posting about a personal issue do you consider your own dignity before exposing what some could consider “your ugly side”? Is the need for advice or commiseration greater than revealing a personal weakness? How important is dignity, personally and in general?

(edited for font size)

I know what I am worth to my family, my friends, and those who come to me for help in my professional life. I can only be worth something to someone if I am being honest. I do consider things before I put them out here on the board but I cannot just sit and read something that is of great interest to me and not express myself. Yes, I know that there are going to be some who disagree with my viewpoint...if everyone agreed, then we'd all have our perfect submissives or dominants and we'd all form one big community and we'd all patronize each others' business because geeeeeeeeez, isn't it nice that we all agree? Disagreement does not lessen my dignity nor does it lessen the dignity of another I may disagree with. How a person comports themselves day to day and within their circle and within their life overall has more to do with dignity than the fact that they have a few flaws.

(in reply to dawntreader)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 6:59:00 PM

velvetears

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Here in the forums i think personal dignity is expressed in how you conduct youself when responding to other posters. If the intention is self serving or to hurt and degrade others, then you loose dignity in my opinion. How you conduct youself should be independent of the situation you are in (here being the post you are responding to). One example is when someone posts and everyone takes an opportunity to, for whatever reason, bash the OP, to join in is undignifed in my opinion. It's acting like a pack dog. Hope i made sense.

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(in reply to CreativeDominant)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 8:04:04 PM

spanklette

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I'm not sure I really think about dignity when I'm posting, but I do think about the type of information that I am sharing. I also tend to think about my audience. Do they really care about my dirty laundry? If I'm looking for advice, I will generally ask in a more private venue. If I'm wondering about something more general, I have no problem posting a question.

I have no illusions that Daddy is perfect or that our relationship is. We've had our ups and downs and have become better for them...but I choose not to share the intimate details of our relationship on a forum such as this. Sometimes, I will use something as an example, but there are some things that others who don't know us personally should be privy to.

I think for me, it's less about dignity and more about privacy...even as silly as that sounds on a public forum.

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

(in reply to dawntreader)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 8:34:02 PM

Griswold

Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dawntreader

There have been many threads recently that have caused me to contemplate personal dignity.
I would like to pose a question or three to both sides of the kneel, regardless of the more specific identifiers we assume for ourselves.
When posting about a personal issue do you consider your own dignity before exposing what some could consider “your ugly side”? Is the need for advice or commiseration greater than revealing a personal weakness? How important is dignity, personally and in general?

(edited for font size)

Well, considering I'm a male sub...and at last count, there were approximately 9,744,812 male subs to every Domme....I'd have to admit...I have no dignity...and if I did...I'd sell it all for some pussy.

(in reply to dawntreader)

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 8:56:49 PM

dawntreader

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ROFL!!!!!!!! Griswold, i can count on you to keep me from getting too serious!

But i do want to again express my gratitude for all the great responses!

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to Griswold)

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Post #: 31

RE: Personal Dignity - 5/9/2007 10:58:56 PM

MissOchistic

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Joined: 4/30/2007
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in general, i don't try to cover up the ugly side when posting. whether it be asking for help or giving it, if there is important info that regards something a bit shamefull, i'll post it anyways. Honesty over image, for me.

_____________________________

"The amount i care for Thee
is more than two, but less than three."

"Submission is a potlatch."

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RE: Personal Dignity - 5/10/2007 2:34:38 AM

julietsierra

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Joined: 9/26/2004
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I don't see airing my dirty laundry as dignified. I SURELY don't see making my Master out to be some horrific someone just because today - this week - we may be having difficulties as dignified.

What I do see as dignified is remembering who my Master is, respecting him enough to not make him the butt of everyone's comments when no one else even knows him, and trusting him enough to take my problems to him verses putting them down here for everyone to chime in on.

What I see as dignified is remembering and adhering to the idea that good relationships are not built on concensus and that ultimately everyone else's ideas about how we should be are just that - their ideas - and have no bearing on the life I lead.

juliet

(in reply to MissOchistic)

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Post #: 33