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agirl -> RE: is it just me? (5/23/2007 3:03:11 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: apettiger
i have been under the impression that for any relationship to work effectively, there has to be compromise, at least in the beginning, by everyone involved. a learning process, if You will.
i have no issue with submitting,i have been doing it for years, but have been running into Those lately, that feel as soon as i express my interest, or willingness to consider Them, i should accept everything They want to do and say to me. if i object to, let's say, heavy pain ( i am not a pain slut) or some of Their brand of humiliation (this is just as an example) They get all freaked out and tell me that because i am the sub/slave, i have no right to object to or request ANYTHING from Them (remember that this is taking place in the first couple of months of meeting Them). and when i finally say that it is not working for me, They refuse to let me go without a bunch of childish name calling and backbiting.
is it wrong to expect a Dom/me to listen to one's wants, needs and desires and act accordingly?
or should a sub accept any and everything the Dom/me wants to subject them to?
I've always thought the opposite. Compromise, for me, comes about when IN a relationship. I don't see where learning and getting to know someone involves compromise.
You can HOPE that your *wants, needs and desires* are listened to and considered, etc, by a dom you're getting to know. If that's what you want and it's apparent they aren't going to provide it, then don't choose them.
If you're not in a relationship with someone you don't HAVE to do anything.
If you've *submitted for years*, how have things worked for you so far? Did your dom/doms listen to you in the past, did they *subject you to any and everything*?
agirl
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