Vanilla to rocky road?

Vanilla to rocky road? (Full Version)

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kauna -> Vanilla to rocky road? (5/22/2007 8:36:48 PM)
For the purposes of this thread, I am vanilla. A little curious - but still vanilla. (Forget for a moment that I have an intense desire to be a slave.) My question is this: how does one broach the topic of slavery with the people in her life that she cares about? I have a dear friend with whom I believe I could have a satisfying M/s relationship, but... I'm afraid to tell Him about my secret yearnings. I'm not so much worried of what He'll say or think... it's really just knowing HOW to say it that has me fearful. I don't want it to be the end of an otherwise-great friendship. Any suggestions? Oh, and if you need more info, please don't hesitate to ask! ~kauna~

LadyAnnabelleLee -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/22/2007 8:37:40 PM)
A book. "When Someone You Love Is Kinky" or something like that. It's a book title, look it up on Borders luv. And ask yourself why you think they need to know?

firefightersgirl -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/22/2007 8:40:50 PM)
Hi there :) Honesty is always the best. Has he ever expressed any interest? If he is a good friend nothing you say is going to ruin the relationship, hint around a little and see what his reactions are. Being a slave is a wonderful thing in the right circumstances.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/22/2007 9:32:44 PM)
And be very careful not to place expectations on someone. It could end up very badly for everyone- just let it flow and see what happens. http://www.collarchat.com/m_966469/mpage_1/key_coming/tm.htm#966514 How do you explain bdsm to vanillas around you? http://www.collarchat.com/m_673932/mpage_1/key_coming/tm.htm#673940 questions about coming out http://www.collarchat.com/m_603184/mpage_1/key_coming/tm.htm#603237 Coming Out http://www.collarchat.com/m_594649/mpage_1/key_coming/tm.htm#594704 Telling Family http://www.collarchat.com/m_552712/mpage_1/key_coming/tm.htm#552726 real world acceptance http://www.collarchat.com/m_500172/mpage_1/key_coming%252Cprocess/tm.htm#500695 So I came out... http://www.collarchat.com/m_191844/mpage_1/key_coming%252Cprocess/tm.htm#192641 family http://www.collarchat.com/m_87719/mpage_1/key_coming%252Cprocess/tm.htm#87743 Talking to vanilla people

earthycouple -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/22/2007 9:42:40 PM)
I ditto LA....don't make anyone feel the pressure...

ennaozzie -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/23/2007 2:41:53 AM)
Well what is between you and your partner is between you two, as to others you care about unless they are your partner i never realy thought it was anyone elses business. As to coming out to others as an example - I had two propective employee's brought to me and the person that brought them to me said to me these two can help out, but does it matter that they are gay? it sort of threw me, i said the only thing that conserns me about someone working here with us is if they can do the job, what the hell has there sexual orientation got to do with weither than can do that job? That is my view on coming out to others but one of the posts said go with the flow see how it goes you will know the right times to bring things up. beanie

lateralist1 -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/23/2007 3:24:12 AM)
I was a good friend to a Dom for twenty years. Although I didn't know he was a Dom. He obviously thought I had slave potential. I don't lol. I'm the most dominant woman I know. What do you want to do for him that you can't do as a good friend? Or is it more about what you want him to do to you? If he hasn't tried to move the relationship on then he obviously doesn't want to or he isn't dominant and would therefore not make a good Dom. Dominant people make things happen.

slaveish -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/23/2007 7:35:39 AM)
Don't involve anyone who doesn't need to be involved, for starters. As for how to approach this potential Master ... hm. A former Dom told me that he was sitting at a party one evening and a girl served him finger food while she was on her knees. It let him know what she was (and then he had the happy task of letting her know who ~he~ was). Perhaps you could kneel in front of this person to see how he responds. Do something subtle - no need to use a hammer when a pillow will suffice.

imthatacheyouhav -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/23/2007 7:43:39 AM)
I have had to tell my adult kids....it wasnt easy..and i went into no kind of detail. They are having less difficulty with the "flavor" of my life and more so with the fact that there dad(my husband)...and i have an arrangement. This seems to be freaking them out alittle...LOL

shyinini -> RE: Vanilla to rocky road? (5/23/2007 10:02:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kauna For the purposes of this thread, I am vanilla. A little curious - but still vanilla. (Forget for a moment that I have an intense desire to be a slave.) My question is this: how does one broach the topic of slavery with the people in her life that she cares about? I have a dear friend with whom I believe I could have a satisfying M/s relationship, but... I'm afraid to tell Him about my secret yearnings. I'm not so much worried of what He'll say or think... it's really just knowing HOW to say it that has me fearful. I don't want it to be the end of an otherwise-great friendship. Any suggestions? Oh, and if you need more info, please don't hesitate to ask! ~kauna~ I dont. Slavery is a difficult "concept" to clarifiy or demystify. Submission is as well, but much easier to discuss. IMHO, one is a slave if the D says you are... and even in that context, while one might call herself a slave (oreven self identify as such) cause the D does, she might be a submissive to everyone else who looks in at the relationship objectively.

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