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Badkarma7 -> Rules (6/4/2007 5:59:43 AM)

I have a question and would greatly appreciate your input. As a submissive, what are some of the rules put forth to you by your Dom/Me? And what are the punishements for violating some of those rules?




ennaozzie -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:09:31 AM)

Like any child when i was with a Doninant he punished me with what i did not like and that was ignoring me for a certain time, it killed me i would have prefered to been belted and got it over with.




fyreredsub -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:10:09 AM)

Morning BadKarma,

fyre has a list given to her..*edited,oops forgot list*  as Master is Gorean He controls ALL...

The punishment can range from a spanking to whipping to neck chained on knees and hooded for an hour or so. absence of master is also something but that is more used on his pain sluts...

the biggest punishment is the one fyre puts herself through when SHE, herself, knows she has NOT been doing what she is supposed to.

well wishes




MstrssPassion -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:11:45 AM)

I will just list my top 3

honesty, truth -- violation of such could very well mean immediate release

consistency, no flip-flopping-- I am a very steadfast individual & because of this I require this in someone I would partner with. I would determine one's consistency in the interviewing process & if I found it to be wavering then the interviewing process would halt.

strive to improve self-- no one is perfect, we are all capable of making mistakes... so early on I expect many mistakes to be made & because of this goals/guidelines will be set. So long as improvements happen, all is well... willful disobedience & blatant disregard will result in immediate release.






MstrssPassion -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:15:11 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ennaozzie

Like any child when i was with a Doninant he punished me with what i did not like and that was ignoring me for a certain time, it killed me i would have prefered to been belted and got it over with.



ahh, but what is learned by just "getting over with it"

time-out is one of the most effective punishments one can use because you eliminate the one thing that is most wanted by your submissive... your attention.

I recall being a child & getting a belt as punishment, I also recall getting older & figuring I'd rather get that belt rather than be cooped up in my room all week. I also recall how the parents got wise to this & one day told me what would you rather receive, belt or grounding... I said belt, so they gave it to me & then sent me to my room. I was told that I had already made my "choice to do wrong" before I was punished & that the choice of punishment would always be theirs because their goal was to prevent me from making wrong choices in the future... for me to dictate how I would prefer to be punished would only result in me electing to do wrong again because the repercussions would be acceptable.




cjenny -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:15:57 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Badkarma7

I have a question and would greatly appreciate your input. As a submissive, what are some of the rules put forth to you by your Dom/Me? And what are the punishements for violating some of those rules?


First rule: I must take care of myself for him. If I cannot do that I must immediately let him know there is a problem.

Second rule: I must always tell him if I am unhappy or worried about something, I must be honest.

Third rule: If I disagree with him, I must take time to formulate a response so that I don't go with emotion over rationality.

There is no punishment for the above, instead there is a long session to determine why I've not obeyed then a course of action is layed out for me.
Heh, all he has to do is be just the slightest bit disappointed in me and that is more pain than any punishment could be.




Celeste43 -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:30:30 AM)

Share with him what's going on inside my head and whatever problems I'm worrying about.

The rule I most dislike is to not get out of bed if I'm awake in the middle of the night. I really hate lying there for hours getting more and more tense knowing I can't go back to sleep. If I just get up to get some tea or water that's okay but wandering is severely discouraged, mainly because if I'm not there he wakes up also.

Not on a punishment dynamic. I get talked to if he's upset and I explain my problem if I can, if not I do it the next day when I'm more able to verbalize it.




Arastella -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:33:28 AM)

1.  Respect my Mistress, no excuses
2.  Doing all I am commanded or ordered to do without complaint.
3.  Address Her as I am expected to address Her at all times
4.  If given punishment, do not resist it but allow it, knowing I have done wrong and must pay penance for it.

Aside from that its pretty much whatever I'm told to do.




Badkarma7 -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 6:34:13 AM)

Thank you all for your information, do you have a list of "things" that you must do for your Dom that if not done will result in punishment? I.E. Not addressing him properly, not being dressed a certain way that he prefers, removing your collar without permission etc, etc




Badkarma7 -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 7:03:07 AM)

What are the other rules you have? For my submissive, she loves to give a certain pleasure so much so that she can get off from it. She must ask to give me that pleasure and I never deny her but that is one of her rules.




SimplyMichael -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 7:10:51 AM)

My most sacred rule is that if she ever mentions GOR without laughing I wash her mouth out with soap.




Badkarma7 -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 7:13:43 AM)

GOR?




Archer -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 7:18:44 AM)

Protocol violations are usually lack of focus rather than acts of will and as such they are not reason for punishment in my house. They are viewed rather as a lack of training and as such, they are my fault. To rectify this I have to work harder on training my slave to 1. Know the standard, 2. Understand the standard, 3. Perform to the standard.

Punishment is generally reserved for acts of will.






whipingherfeet -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 7:27:00 AM)

there only one  rule obey your master or mistress at all times




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 7:29:05 AM)

Reposted:
quote:

ORIGINAL: Badkarma7
All, I am a new Dom and I have a question, I have posed this to submissives and I am posing it here as well. What are some of the rules you have in place for your submissives


Ones which make sense for us, which have practical value, which allow us to have MORE fun time together and not less, ones which actuallymake us feel more connected to ourselves and eachother.

That being said in my relationship we really only have two "rules"- be honest and true to yourselves and eachother.

The rest is stuff we mutually agree we should do for now.  We don't set rules and force our lives to abide by them- we do things and then see if they fit, if they start to not fit, we change how we do things.


quote:

and what is / are the punishements for violations of said rules.


I'd say focus far less on this and focus far more on getting to the motivations for the good and bad behavior.  Punishment should be IMO rare and serious occasions.


quote:

That last one brings up another question, do you allow your submissives to remove their own collars?


Sure.

quote:

If so under what circumstances and do you require that they always wear some type of jewlery, vanilla collar when they are in public. I know this is a terribly long post but I am evolving and I crave the information to help my growth. Thank you all in advance.


You really need to remember that it's whatever works for your relationship.  Even one person can have vastly different relationships at the same time.  Do it because it serves you and your life, not because it's in some guidebook.




MasterFireMaam -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 8:02:28 AM)

I prefer not to punish and accept what is given. There ARE consequences, though. If I don't get what I want, the Master is not fed, which means the relationship does not go to the desired level. In many cases, I see that all I need to do is change the "angle of attack" so to speak in order to get my goal accomplished.

For example, let's say I give the assignment of taking out the trash. It does not get done. I do it myself and I'm aggrivated about it. I let it be known that I'm not happy. The next time I'm asked for a want (like play), I either insist they take out the trash on a consistant basis for X amount of time in order to get the reward or I simply say know and give the reason why. I'm likely to do both.

Sometimes, what I'm trying to do is to fulfill a goal. Let's say I assign a book to read because I want the person to learn about the basics of BDSM. They refuse to read it. I then see that if I want my goal to be met, I need to have a different tactic in order to get it done. That means that the next time we go to an event together, I'm sending them to a bunch of 101 BDSM classes. If they complain, I explain why.

Master Fire




MissPriss88 -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 8:15:10 AM)

general rules: always adressing Him with proper respect
                    NEVER giving a command. Even something as simple as "have a nice day"
                    always answering with either yes, Sire, or no, Sire
                    No more wearing hair ties on my wrists (something that has proven harder for me to overcome than I thought =^)

punishments: the absolute worst punishment is the dissapointment in his voice when he makes my errors known to me.




farieanne -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 8:23:22 AM)

i have a few rules though my Master believes that though He owns me i am still human and an adult so usually talking to me is enough. punishment and discipline are used as a last resort, usually for disobeying a direct order without a good reason or repeated offence. The punishment often depends on the offence. Sometimes spanking as i am not a pain slut sometimes not talking to me as i am an attention hog and it kills me to know i have let Him down.
 
1.) i am to take care of myself for Him. keep myself clean and neat and immediately inform Him if/when there is ANY problems, health or other wise.
 
2.) Tell Him my thoughts, feeling, and emotions ALWAYS but in the proper time, place, and tone.
 
3.) Call Him Master or Daddy
 
4.) Remember that where ever i am and what ever i am doing i am a representative of Him and should always be respectful and mind protocol if within the community. Inform him as soon as possible of any issues.
 
5.) Greet Him when He comes home, clean and neat, with "welcome home Master" , as i can no longer kneel well i am to stand tall with chin up and hands clasped behind my back.
 
6.) i am NOT to use profanity.
 
7.) i am not to remove my collar without permission first.
 
8.) Have His towel and clothes ready for Him when He comes home so He can shower.
 
9.) i am not to leave the house without permission and i must inform Him of where i am going, when i will be home, and who i am with. If i am to be late i am to call Him.
 
10.) Have the house clean and neat. no rules of when or how i am to do this other than that it be done, ( except He is picky about how the sheets are put on the bed.)
 
11.) in public either wait for him to tell me i may be seated or ask for permission.
 
12.) At lifestyle event i am to have His permission before serving another Dom/me, such as getting coffee or emptying ashtrays or getting something for them. (He does not share sexually)
 
13.) ALWAYS be honest and truthful to the point of brutality. (Wwe both follow this rule)
 
14.) Ask permission before hugging someone other than family and close friends
 
15.) NEVER say no to Him or refuse Him ANYTHING.
 
16.) Get His approval for my clothing for the day if going out.
 
There are probably a few more i am not remembering right off though He did list them and had me memorize them. These are not in order and He may change them or add to them at any time.




imthatacheyouhav -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 8:25:45 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

My most sacred rule is that if she ever mentions GOR without laughing I wash her mouth out with soap.

[sm=biggrin.gif]




slaveluci -> RE: Rules (6/4/2007 9:58:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael
My most sacred rule is that if she ever mentions GOR without laughing I wash her mouth out with soap
You must have copied that from my Master's "rule book" [;)]...slave luci




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