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Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 7:44:55 AM   
MyMastersOwn


Posts: 58
Joined: 5/24/2007
Status: offline 		This isn't a thread arguing LDRs. I'm just interested in how others, that are in LDRs deal with certain things.

First a little back ground. I'm newly collared in a LDR. I never before have been in a LDR of more than perhaps 100 miles. To me that was close enough for driving. Being able to see more of each other. Now that's not to say I've never been in LDRs. I grew up in and married to the military twice. So use to distance of trying to keep a relationship going while love one is 1000s of miles away. Having been in those two marriages and dealing with the distance, helped me know that LDRs where not for me.

And more so on line. Definately on line LDRs were not for me. Till Master came along. And trust me.. it took him over a year to wear me down. LOL ...I past up alot of on line advances strictly due the distance between myself and the one trying to get close to me. Head strong and stubborn.

So anyways. Master comes along and now I find myself in a serious LDR. I'm on East Coast, he's on West coast. Serious LDR here....LOL

Things have been going fine the past few months. Weeks even. Till last night. I found myself back to the starting of our first times of conversations. I have previously argued how the distance was too much. Unreasonable. Unfair to either one of us. Now over the past year +, Master has delt with my feelings on this. Patiently he allowed me to vent my anger, and concerns over the distance. It didn't set him back. Just made him more determined. There were times I felt we didn't talk about nothing at all that wasn't M/s related. Sexual talking (not cybering... neither of us do the cybering). But I know we did talk of alot of other things.

So now here I am again. Feeling like this distance is going to be the doom of our relationship. Maybe because I have never felt relief over the distance situation. It's never left my mind. Master has just helped me put it out of my mind for days and or week at a time. But I can't shake it this time. After our talk last night. I was so angered I couldn't wait for him to dismiss me so I could just go to bed. And tried to put everything out of my mind. Easier to say, harder to do. What makes it worse.. is waking up to the same thoughts and feelings.

Now I can honestly state to you...as well to myself. I'm not feeling this way because someone more local is in this picture. Because that just isn't so. Not on my side. During my absence due to health reason .I know Master has taken under his wing, two more local slaves. And no there's no jealousy involved here. It actually makes me feel better knowing that he is able to have something/someone local to have hands on with.

Maybe i'm feeling i'm interfering with something. Master lets me know things are good between us. He's in the all with me. Never failing to be here when both of us aren't working and the outside world allows it.

Sitting here thinking about all I've written so far... I just feel this LDR isn't fair to him. No matter how much he tells me he's happy. No matter how often he tells me i'm his first. It all falls back to me feeling like i'm being unfair to him.

So my question about LDRs.. for those that are in LDRs. How do you deal with this feeling? From both sides. Is it normal to feel like one is being unfair to another. Where you are so rapped up in the relationship that all you want is the other to be happy. Specially Master. That you begin to feel he'll be happier if he just lets you go and work on more local relationships?

I'm in such a self destruction mode again it seems. I am NOT seeking release. I'm not wanting anyone else in my life. I just seem to be in a wrong frame of mind I guess. I just seriously think he would be better off.

I know it's not my place to think or feel for him. I do not have any control over his thoughts... feelings... anything. I just can't help wanting him to be happy.  

Are these feelings normal? Are there ways of dealing with them. Without feeling you are being a burden on Master. Yes last night I did try to talk with Master about this. He always let me voice myself to him. No matter if it's god or bad. He listens and talks back. But last night it just seemed there was no more that could be talked about or said. To make me feel as if i'm being unfair to him in wanting to keep this LDR. And it just angered me more to feel previous anger come back to the surface over the LDR at all. Angered that I allowed myself to enter this. And now I feel more angered that I am angered over this.

I look forward to seeing how others deal with and work on this situation that are in LDRs. Like I said this is not a rant. This is just one that is self destruction mode again trying to not run... but actually wanting to deal with this. I'm use to running. But I don't want to run.

And before the question is asked. Being more local between Master and I is unavailable at this time. As we have discussed. It's not him ... not wanting me there. It's me not being able to go there right now. Due to my girls... and their lives here. Can't just uproot teenagers and move cross country to be a slave. I can..but we discussed and agreed I won't.

Thanks for taking the time to let me voice my concerns...and look forward to others in LDRs responses to this.

Jessica

< Message edited by MyMastersOwn -- 6/4/2007 7:48:19 AM >
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RE: Question For This IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 7:47:50 AM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		A quick answer because I haven't the time right now.
My dom tells me that he is fine with it as well, that as his submissive I have no choice but to believe him when he says that.
So...
I do.

I believe he is okay with it, and that much of my fears are my own that I project onto him.
Sorry that was so basic... outta time.

_____________________________

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~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 7:53:17 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		You really do need to just accept what he's giving you as the truth and stop the whole "Is he happy?" line.  It's useless energy.  He says he's happy and fulfilled, and that's what you need to take it as until his actions start to show differently.

Now, for YOU- you need to decide what you really want and need for yourself, what will make you fulfilled.  Was there something specific which caused this most recent backtracking?  Or was it just a normal cycle that perhaps you should pay attention to?

What are you both doing to focus on the future and make this a non LDR?


http://www.collarchat.com/m_688989/mpage_3/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#689642
LDRs and you

http://www.collarchat.com/m_555442/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#555476
How do you cope?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_399208/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#399230
Long distance relationships...how do you all make them work and overcome the obstacles that arise?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_358232/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#358330
When the Master is away

http://www.collarchat.com/m_243191/mpage_2/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#243396
Online or Distance relationships

http://www.collarchat.com/m_5502/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#207957
Long Distance Relationships

http://www.collarchat.com/m_214831/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#214831
Long distance d/s

http://www.collarchat.com/m_210165/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#210165
Pleasing my master long distance

http://www.collarchat.com/m_131170/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#131170
In Between Visits

http://www.collarchat.com/m_124826/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#124826
LDR and sickness or death

http://www.collarchat.com/m_89834/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#89834
Long distance punishment ideas

http://www.collarchat.com/m_22973/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#22973
Long Distance Relationship (2)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_5502/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#5502
Long Distance Relationships (2)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3521/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#3521
Long Distance

http://www.collarchat.com/m_272610/mpage_1/key_LDR/tm.htm#272610
LDR D/s ideas

http://www.collarchat.com/m_108560/mpage_1/key_LDR/tm.htm#108560
Long Distance Relationships????



_____________________________

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"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:10:50 AM   
MyMastersOwn


Posts: 58
Joined: 5/24/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks LA...can always count on you to ask me something to think about. Fullfillment is not the issue here for me. And perhaps there is a pattern I do need to look at. I think i'm just scared to look at it. Maybe i'm trying to avoid it so that I do not use it to backtrack... I'm trying not to run. Which is my pattern, when I think things are going wrong or badly. And if I feel i'm trying to correct things.. get them right..and they do appear to be being fixed... I just leave. It's sort of like i'm saying.. "I tried..I failed.. good bye"

As for what are we doing about working on working on..focusing on the future. We do talk about it. We listen and repsond to each others questions and responses. I guess sometimes we talk of it so much that... that is where I start getting the feeling that all we talk about is my slavery. Not gerneral things.. just my slavery to Master. And that's what starts getting to me. Cause I start feeling there's more to life than my slavery. And I start thinking there's nothing more to him.. than my slavery and service to him. I guess I spend too much time thinking.

Edited to add...

Thanks for the links. I know I probably posted in 1 or more of them about LDRs ..about it's being each ones own thing then do it. But it wasn't my thing..now here I sit...and yes I feel almost like a hypocite for it as well. I never told anyone they shouldn't... I just said it wasn't for me.... at that time apparently...LOL

< Message edited by MyMastersOwn -- 6/4/2007 8:13:41 AM >

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:18:31 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MyMastersOwn

Sitting here thinking about all I've written so far... I just feel this LDR isn't fair to him. No matter how much he tells me he's happy. No matter how often he tells me i'm his first. It all falls back to me feeling like i'm being unfair to him.

Look carefully at this and see that this could be a projection on your part...that what you really feel is that what you are doing to yourself by being in an LDR isn't fair to YOU. That you really feel that you are doing yourself a disservice by being in an LDR when you swore you didn't want one. Sometimes, we stay in our comfort zone even though that zone isn't healthy for us (another way to put this is that we stay in hell because we know all the street names). But...in asnwer to your other questions...

quote:

So my question about LDRs.. for those that are in LDRs. How do you deal with this feeling? From both sides. Is it normal to feel like one is being unfair to another. Where you are so rapped up in the relationship that all you want is the other to be happy. Specially Master. That you begin to feel he'll be happier if he just lets you go and work on more local relationships?

Currently, I am in NC and she is in AZ. This is about to change, however, as I am moving to AZ in early August (anyone want to buy a house?) We talk every day. We see each other about every two months. We have rituals that ground us. She serves as she can from a distance, which right now means she serves her community and represents me well.

quote:

I'm in such a self destruction mode again it seems. I am NOT seeking release. I'm not wanting anyone else in my life. I just seem to be in a wrong frame of mind I guess. I just seriously think he would be better off.

Part of your negative headspace come from the fact that you are telling him how he is supposed to feel, which is that the relationship isn't healthy for him and that he should be unhappy. You cannot do this. He, and only he, is responsible for his own feelings. If he says he's ok, you must take that as truth. If you truly struggle getting through that, again, look to see if it isn't your projection of your supressed feelings of unfairness and unhappiness.

quote:

I know it's not my place to think or feel for him. I do not have any control over his thoughts... feelings... anything. I just can't help wanting him to be happy. 

You are basing his feelings of happiness and satisfaction on your own criteria, which might be why you aren't convinced that he's happy...because if you were the Dominant, you wouldn't be happy with this. Stop trying to control him. It's not your place.

quote:

Are these feelings normal? Are there ways of dealing with them. Without feeling you are being a burden on Master. Yes last night I did try to talk with Master about this. He always let me voice myself to him. No matter if it's god or bad. He listens and talks back. But last night it just seemed there was no more that could be talked about or said. To make me feel as if i'm being unfair to him in wanting to keep this LDR. And it just angered me more to feel previous anger come back to the surface over the LDR at all. Angered that I allowed myself to enter this. And now I feel more angered that I am angered over this.

Anger is simply another for of fear. What is your true fear in this situation? I'm betting it's abandonment...you're waiting and expecting him to abandon you because you are absolutely convinced he's not happy. If you keep obsessing about this, you WILL MAKE THIS HAPPEN. We call our fears to us if we obsess about them.


Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:24:03 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MyMastersOwn

So my question about LDRs.. for those that are in LDRs. How do you deal with this feeling? From both sides. Is it normal to feel like one is being unfair to another. Where you are so rapped up in the relationship that all you want is the other to be happy. Specially Master. That you begin to feel he'll be happier if he just lets you go and work on more local relationships?


i'm in a similar LDR like yours and i understand your sentiment about uprooting UMs to move near Daddy ...i wish it was possible however it's not for many good reasons. 

that being said, Daddy and i when we first started our D/s dynamic discussed about me meeting someone local in my area even though our relationship wouldn't change one bit. He has made it clear that we are forever as Daddy and daughter because He made a promise that He'll always be there to take care of me (and my UMs).  on the flipside, i'm currently in a relationship with someone local i met via here which makes Daddy very happy because it was one of His goals for me ...besides it does help that Daddy likes this person who's in my life. however it doesn't mean i don't love either one any less but i do share a special separate connection with them.


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:27:59 AM   
darkinshadows


Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline
Hello Jessica
 
From an ex ldr -
Wanting your partner to be happy isn't strange and not feeling adequate or enough isn't wrong to feel (this is how and why we improve ourselves and persist) it only becomes a problem if you become obsessed with it and stop listening to what he is telling you.
 
LAs post is exactly right.
 
quote:

You really do need to just accept what he's giving you as the truth and stop the whole "Is he happy?" line.  It's useless energy.  He says he's happy and fulfilled, and that's what you need to take it as until his actions start to show differently.

This was theee hardest thing I had to realise and I still have to keep kicking myself at times to remember that you have to trust what he says.  If you can't, then quite honestly there is no point being in a relationship ldr or closeby, with a person whos words you don't trust and don't listen to.
 
Peace


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.dark.



...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:30:51 AM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		I'm not in a LDR but have been in them.
quote:

So my question about LDRs.. for those that are in LDRs. How do you deal with this feeling? From both sides.

Hard as it is, you trust your partner, and that when they say they are happy, they mean it. You trust that when they say this is what they want, they mean it. And you honestly look and find out if your feeling is coming from not being thoroughly happy on your part - and how you can then fix it.
quote:

Is it normal to feel like one is being unfair to another. Where you are so rapped up in the relationship that all you want is the other to be happy. Specially Master. That you begin to feel he'll be happier if he just lets you go and work on more local relationships?

I think it is normal, yes. I think that the fact is that when your LDR means you are online together whenever you are free, it also means that you are missing out on certain RT things. You aren't going out and playing sports because you don't want your partner to miss out on time with you. Or going for drinks with friends. And even if those examples aren't true, if there ARE any situations in your life where you are skipping out on fleshlife so that you can spend time with your partner, you will wonder - what is HE giving up to spend time with ME - and is that fair? Sometimes it is good to bring this specifically up and make more of an effort to balance your life - make sure you are doing RT things, living fleshlife and enjoying it, as WELL as getting good online time with the LDR.
You said you have military background in relationships. You might know that when your partner is TDY, on remote tour, or on deployment, you can't sit at home waiting for their call no matter how much you want to. The waiting will kill you. You HAVE to go out, keep living, keep doing the things you always do, knowing that the partner loves you and will return. Handwritten letters mailed through the USPS mean that you can express your thoughts and love whenever you have a moment - on the bus, in waiting rooms, what have you. And those random thoughts carry well to a partner who receives an unexpected letter.
There is every chance that you are so longing for touch, comfort, cuddling, and fleshlife that you are wondering if perhaps he longs for it too, and by holding onto the relationship you are cheating him of that. But since he DOES have RT slaves, it might be better if you were to find a lover, or a compassionate friend who can give you some of the physical comfort even if it isn't sexual.
Your feelings are normal. Your anger is a healthy expression of frustration with a situation you cannot change. Journalling is a good way to deal with this. Punching pillows is a good way to express anger, and once it's expressed, putting it into words is a good way of facing it and trying to find it's root. Whether you chat with Master, write him an e-mail, write a message board post, or journal, putting your anger into words helps you to analyze why you are angry, and then you can come to terms with it.

Hold onto the knowledge that the distance WILL end, even if it takes a few years. Hold onto how much your partner loves you, and how much you love him. Hold onto the blessed knowledge that he is NOT in a war zone, he is NOT in the military serving under danger, and that he DOES want this relationship.

And you want it too, so hold onto the fact that you can keep fighting for it.

~E


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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:32:08 AM   
mstrjx


Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline 		I hadn't been in an LDR until now.  Our distance is 'manageable' for me, only 700 miles.  We've been seeing each other 2 1/2 months.  In that time, we've been together for roughly 24 hours at a time 3 times.  This weekend I'm visiting again, and bringing her back with me for a week.  This will be our first extended period of time being together.

After this, I'll be taking flights instead of driving, and have trips planned for July and August, so although the time will still be a little over a day, it won't involve a grueling drive.

From the moment we started communicating, it was with the intent on either being together in the future, or not at all (which really wasn't acceptable).  We've established that it will be mostly likely I (95% chance) to move to be with her, and we're trying to work out a timeframe.  There's still a couple of things that need to be worked out logistically before a final date can be set, although we're hoping that even those will be worked out in the next couple of weeks.

We chat and cam daily.  Without this, I'm certain things would have been much more difficult.  Fortunately, we're both pretty committed, and seeing other people in the interim was never a question at all.  Each time we're together, separating becomes less easy.  In two weeks, after having spent 9 days and 8 nights together, I suspect it will be very hard, but necessary as we work out what needs to be done.

LDR's are possible, but require a lot of effort.  You know this already, as it appears yours has gone on for quite some time.  I believe the key 'is' in looking to the future, and believing that those goals are manageable.

Good luck.

Jeff

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:33:31 AM   
MyMastersOwn


Posts: 58
Joined: 5/24/2007
Status: offline 		I had to read your post 3 times... I believe you are right. It appears it's all me. And to a point.. I knew this. I just am trying to not run. I'm trying to understand and deal with my feelings about all this. I could blame it all on me. But it's not all me. Not him. It just is.  But you have given me fuel for thought. Thank you.

Oh and i'm in NC as well... hope you're ready for summer... gonna be a hot one..LOL

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:34:55 AM   
milkmaid42dd


Posts: 41
Joined: 3/1/2007
Status: offline 		I too am new to a LDR... I don't even believe in them, LOL. I still ask myself how this happened, and can't answer myself, but I DO know that I don't want to trade in my Master for a r/l Master, I want HIM to be my r/l Master. But we're only 2 months or less into the relationship, and have not met in person yet (we're planning that now). Maybe it's foolish of me (well, I KNOW it is! I have always let my heart rule my head) but I feel that I know him so well, and he has my trust and complete devotion so implicitly, that if he said "Pack your things and come now," I would do it. Fortunately he has more sense than me, and also I have 6 months to go on my lease ;) 

I too worry about being a burden on him. Although yes, I am basically an emotional creature, I have always been very stable. But I've been inducing lactation, and the hormones that are being stimulated in that process have me on an emotional rollercoaster very similar to the old PMS days that are (thankfully!) long behind me. Many days I feel weepy for no reason at all, and I get upset by people and events much more easily. He demands that I let him know when I am upset, and he calls and calms me... just hearing his voice calms me, always... but I worry that one day it will be too much for him and he will turn away from me. When I mentioned this to him, however, he said he was going to have to "ka-POW" me for thinking that <laugh>

It is VERY hard. He lives in Canada and I'm in the U.S. I'm afraid to even ask him if I can move to him, for fear he will think I'm just after a Canadian residency (do Canadians have the same problem with that as we Americans do? foreign guys are always after me when all they really want is a green card, so I'm ultrasensitive on the issue). He himself has not brought it up, but then again, less than 2 months in, why should he? I am thinking, he is waiting until we meet in person and see how it goes. I hope and pray so hard for this.

Then again, he says it is not fair for me to not have someone real, and that he would release me to a real-time Master. So maybe he never wanted more than this. But I don't WANT anyone else to be my real-time Master, I want HIM (yes, indeedy, that is a whine you hear! LOL!)

He has given me permission to find a sub or vanilla male type if I can to nurse and help to bring in the milk, since it does take a long time with only pumping. This, despite the fact that he has told me that he does not share, and does not want other males around me. But he put aside his own preference and told me to find someone to help with the lactation, because he felt it was best for me. I can't describe how that makes me feel, and I fall in love with him even more for doing so.

I guess I haven't been much help. But I surely, surely know where you are coming from. I guess all we can do is have faith that one day we can be together with our respective Masters for real.

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:45:56 AM   
MyMastersOwn


Posts: 58
Joined: 5/24/2007
Status: offline 		Elorin... thank you. But I might have misstated something. Master and I both have our lives we do live. We both speak daily and nightly informing each other of work schedules... and with my girls ... I always inform him if I can't be about at such and such time because of spending time with them. Or just going out with my friends. I'm not much of a going out type person. So when I do, he tells me to have fun.

My girls have birthdays this week.. both of them....and friday is the last day of school for them for the summer. And he knows on my free time from work... i'll be playing taxi driver... to the beaches... malls.. friends houses... lol

Over the past year.. he's use to this and we both just work around it all.

Like I have stated .... there's really nothing wrong with our relationship at all. The only thing I PERSONALLY seem to be obessing about is the distance. But already with the few postings I have read. I see more clearly my own faults in this situation. I seen it before...and never denied it. Just I find posting here...and reading all your responses is forcing me to address them more.

Master has already responded to me this morning on my thoughts of distance, and he's holding strong that things will work themselves out. And I do trust him...and his word. It's just hard. Specially when you are still training with the one you have given yourself over to. I'm not use to being a slave.. I was a submissive way too long... and my training though been going on for almost a year.. still isn't perfect..


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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:47:26 AM   
milkmaid42dd


Posts: 41
Joined: 3/1/2007
Status: offline 		That makes 3 of us in NC!  and Master Fire Ma'am, I am sooooooo envious, I moved here from Tucson and so miss it!

quote:

ORIGINAL: MyMastersOwn

I had to read your post 3 times... I believe you are right. It appears it's all me. And to a point.. I knew this. I just am trying to not run. I'm trying to understand and deal with my feelings about all this. I could blame it all on me. But it's not all me. Not him. It just is.  But you have given me fuel for thought. Thank you.

Oh and i'm in NC as well... hope you're ready for summer... gonna be a hot one..LOL

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RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:52:00 AM   
BrutalMasterOne


Posts: 53
Joined: 4/8/2007
Status: offline 		Ok been there, done that, have a wet t-shirt... but here is the low down skinny as I see it, and frankly it is just one person's advice.
 
I know that as a "slave" the idea of leaving one's Master is really sort of out of the question. Yet reading between the lines you are worried. The first question of course would be, "Have you met face to face yet?" If the answer to that question is "NO" then your course should be clear. LEAVE, just go your own way and find someone whom you can be with, or ask yourself, "Did I arrange this so it WOULD be impossible?"
 
Now assuming yoiu two have met, how often can you meet each other? In my own case with LDR's I have always tried to make it at least every four or five weeks. That works for quite a while but even that grows thin after a while. Two years is about the longest I could handle it for.
 
You are upset about uprooting kids, and I would agree. BUT and this is important, kids are very resiliant and while they may not like it the experience becomes just that, one more experience. Plenty of people move and for plenty of reasons and their kids do not all go nuts.
 
Last thought, are his other "slaves" no real life also? Just some questions to help you think, I know there are others in his life, but in what ways. I have met MANY persons who live on the net and truly believe that their relationships are valid and wonderful, but over time for those of us who are real it wears pretty thin.
 
It sounds as if you don't really know all that much about him, his life in real life, etc. Once more please remember that this is what I see, and should not affect you in your decided course. Sometimes letting go is far better than continuing something that cannot work out well.

(in reply to MyMastersOwn)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:52:08 AM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		If I helped, I'm glad.
You didn't misstate, I was simply working with the first thing that came to mind of why it might not seem fair on one side or another to be in a LDR.
I'm glad to read that writing and reading here is helping you deal.
Here's to the next few years flying by so you can be with him...and lasting long so you can enjoy your last years with your girls.

~E

_____________________________

'cause when i look down /i just miss all the good stuff / when i look up / i just trip over things

(in reply to MyMastersOwn)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:52:28 AM   
MyMastersOwn


Posts: 58
Joined: 5/24/2007
Status: offline 		Milkmaid....... why don't you just confuse me more .......lmao

Interesting though. I hope you too get what you are wanting. Keep me informed.

(in reply to milkmaid42dd)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 8:58:35 AM   
milkmaid42dd


Posts: 41
Joined: 3/1/2007
Status: offline 		Tell me about it :(  On the bright side, you can look at my situation and see how things could be worse! LOL.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MyMastersOwn

Milkmaid....... why don't you just confuse me more .......lmao

(in reply to MyMastersOwn)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 9:01:37 AM   
thoren


Posts: 6
Joined: 5/28/2007
Status: offline 		A few of my LDRs have worked out well. In general, I find that D/s connection makes distance less important. I have a pension . So where ever my craved subbie happens to be, is where I 'll relocate to. In generl, I am far less eagr to chase avanilla frindship for any distance at all. The intensity has to be there from the start..
Thoren
Dominant Guide of Submissive treasure. 
' 

(in reply to milkmaid42dd)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Question For Those IN A LDR... Not a Dispute - 6/4/2007 9:04:08 AM   
MyMastersOwn


Posts: 58
Joined: 5/24/2007
Status: offline 		Afternoon BrutalMaster....

I see what you are saying in all of your post. Answer to #1 question. Met in person.. No. Which to a very small point use to be an issue with me that I was able to over come. Meeting someone in real life... (been there done that too and got my membership t-shirt too).. didn't make a bit of difference when I got abandoned.

Maybe I am using my girls as an excuse when it comes to uprooting and moving. But growing up military and being uprooted got the better of me and I want my girls to feel stable and happy. They're spoiled rotten when it comes to mom making sure they're happy. Now we've discussed moving to California... and they're not totally against it. Their father and family are all out there. But they've settled here over past 10 years with schools.. friends... my family... they're planning their lives from here... not there. My girls would make the move.. but I won't ask them to just for the soul purpose to be Master's hands on slave. And Master agrees with this.

And as for not knowing alot about Master's real life. I admit that. When we talk. I learn more. Just as he learns more about mine as well. Time is not my enemy.. just the distance. I have plenty of time...

But thank you for your bluntness as well. Those were issues I had to deal with over a year ago when Master first started his courting... we've over come most of those...and still working on some of them.

< Message edited by MyMastersOwn -- 6/4/2007 9:07:04 AM >

(in reply to BrutalMasterOne)
Profile   Post #: 19
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