stella40
Posts: 417
Joined: 1/11/2006
From: London, UK
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quote:
ORIGINAL: BrutalMasterOne
Gosh, I didn't realize that this is a role.. I have known that I was a sadist and a control freak ever since I was four years old! As for it being fantasy? Well speak for yourself. Some play a game, to others of us it is a true way. You feel you can't own a person, a slave, and that is fine for you. However in my life I have figured out how to own them
- Make them dependent upon you
- Condition them to know what they are
- Have a legal enforceable contract (yes it really can be done)
- Make it emotionally impossible for them to leave
- Have them fall in unreasonable and complete love with you
These are just a very few steps and each one of those could fill a book.... While it is true that I "own" several slaves they all are very long term and they are all highly unusual women too. Why would want to "enslave" a person who had no self worth... but this little mini rant of mine is something that I guess I'll have to expand upon.
Fantasy is something imaginary, and believe me for some of us this works out to be a lifetime reality.
Hmm, this is a very interesting opinion.. the 'born' sadist and control freak. But unfortunately I don't buy it.
Now you write that you have 'known' you were a sadist and control freak since you were four years old? Right? So are you trying to tell me you were born a sadist and control freak? Or that as a four year old you had already worked out that you were a sadist and control freak and had decided to be a Dom?
You must have been such an interesting child. Did you tell your parents 'When I grow up I'm going to be a Master'? Or did you write to Santa Claus and ask 'for a slave'?
I don't buy it at all. Let me explain why.
If you were born a sadist, then surely your biological role in life would be to make people suffer, cause pain, but where would it stop? Could you kill people?
Surely if you were born a sadist it would make an adequate defence if you did kill someone. Your lawyer would simply have to say "My client Mr X is a born sadist, and that's why he kills people." That would place you outside the law. By your reasoning someone like Ted Bundy or John Wayne Gacy wouldn't get convicted, because they're born sadists.
Another reason why I don't buy your argument is simple straightforward child development. Aren't all 3 and 4 year olds control freaks? Aren't they just reacting to the world, their environment and their relationships emotionally? They want something they intend to get it, and when they don't get it they throw an almighty wobbly.
Most children don't start thinking or rationalizing things until they get to about 5 or 6, which is probably why they don't start their education before this age. But you claim that you knew at the age of 4 that you were a sadist and a control freak.
What you are doing isn't reality. Not at all. While there may be genetic factors which you were born with nobody is ever born a sadist or a masochist, nor dominant or submissive, it is something they become, i.e. it is socially acquired, and it is done so through how you respond to socialization. Some external behaviour may trigger something inside you, which may be genetic or not, it could be the result of an external influence, but you still acquire such needs and such behaviour.
Now, as a sadist, you can either suppress your needs, or you can seek to fulfil them, but either way, you are assuming and adopting the role of a sadist. While it may be very serious to you, it isn't anything more than a role you perform.
And in performing a role, you function in that role.
And you have explained how you make someone your slave, but this isn't reality, these are roles and you are still playing games.
But here I am defining roles, games etc as TA or transactional analysis, which is psychoanalytical theory developed by American psychiatrist Eric Berne in the 1950's. Berne revised Freud's concept of the human psyche (the id, the ego and super-ego) as three 'ego states' - the Parent, Child and Adult states. And this is a theory on how people interact with each other.
Now let's go back to your 'reality' to making someone your 'true' slave. You wrote:
You feel you can't own a person, a slave, and that is fine for you. However in my life I have figured out how to own them
* Make them dependent upon you
* Condition them to know what they are
* Have a legal enforceable contract (yes it really can be done)
* Make it emotionally impossible for them to leave
* Have them fall in unreasonable and complete love with you
These are just a very few steps and each one of those could fill a book.... While it is true that I "own" several slaves they all are very long term and they are all highly unusual women too.
Now in each of the verbs which I have highlighted you are doing something through which you are entering into interaction with another person, you are entering what is known as a transaction because you are anticipating a response, and it is at this very point that you are playing a role. You are seeking a productive social interaction, are you not?
It is a game, and I define a game here as a series of transactions (interactions) that are complementary (reciprocal) or ulterior and which proceed towards a predictable outcome.
Games are often played by all three ego states - Parent, Adult and Child, they usually have a fixed number of players, but however a players role can shift. Now each game has a 'payoff' for whoever is playing it. The payoff can be to earn sympathy, satisfaction, vindication, or some other emotion which reinforces the life's script.
And yes, each and every one of us is living to a script in life - it could be a winning script, it could be a losing script, a Cindarella script, but it is a script and we are playing our role in that script.
Now the game may have an antithesis which breaks the script and deprives the other player of the payoff. As an example a submissive may approach a Domme on Collarme by writing a message (taking on the role) expecting her to respond (the payoff). The Domme may respond and thus take up the role of Domme and enter the transaction, thus giving the submissive his payoff, or she may not respond, in which case she has responded with an antithesis.
What you are doing is playing a role through your Parent ego state and entering into a transaction with a female submissive who you expect to play the role through her Child ego state. You are anticipating a payoff, which is to make that female submissive your slave and each transaction or interaction you enter into is designed to have that same payoff - and you need that payoff to be able to continue to play or perform your role in your life script which is as a Dom or Master who owns female slaves.
Ergo, it is a role and you are playing that role and living your script, just like everyone else on this planet. You perceive it to be reality. I don't. I'm not you,I don't live your life, I have my own reality and am living my own script. However I am not saying you are wrong to claim what you are living is reality, you are right. However I have my own perception. What is 'reality' anyway if not 'the truth as it appears to you'?
You may choose to disagree with me. I would be very interesting in hearing your arguments. I would also be very interested in reading your book.
But I stay with my original position which is in full agreement with the OP that we are playing roles.
< Message edited by stella40 -- 6/5/2007 1:34:39 PM >
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I try to take one day at a time, but several days come and attack me at once. (Jennifer Unlimited)
If you can't be a good example then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
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RE: It's all just roleplaying (a rant) - 
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