Warning! (Full Version)

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darchChylde -> Warning! (6/8/2007 10:42:46 AM)

BDSM Warning! please read

John Doe strode into the bedroom , wearing His leather Postal Worker's uniform. He sneered at the bound and gagged figure on the bed, as He reached into His latex mail bag. Jane Doe, a 29 year old schoolgirl, looked up at her Master, her eyes a mixture of fear and desire. She gasped as He brought a knife with a 9 ~ inch blade out of the bag.

"I saw something on the Internet which I want us to try," He said sternly,

"Are you willing?"

Jane nodded eagerly and mumbled, "yeff Mather".

John smiled as He bent close and cut her free of her bonds.

"Strip", He ordered as He began to remove His own clothes..

Jane quickly complied, wondering what new delights her beloved Master had in store for her.

"Lay back on the bed", He commanded.

Jane did so. John then laid on top of her.

"Tonight my dear", He whispered while reaching for the light switch.. "We are going ........... Vanilla!"

"NOOOOOOoooooooooo", cried Jane as the room plunged into darkness.

The above tale is true. John eventually left Jane to move in with a vanilla woman. They now have a 24/7 vanilla lifestyle, regularly enjoying home improvements, Tupperware parties and only having sex 3 times a year.

Jane was more fortunate and now attends Vanillas Anonymous, with help and guidance she is slowly recovering. Only last week she was able to stand up and say,

"I have the right to more than one sexual position!"

Vanilla is dangerous and should not be practiced at home. If anyone offers you vanilla sex, just say No.

This has been a BDSM safety awareness announcement. 




LadyEllen -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 10:46:53 AM)

Not before time DC - those fucking perverts all ought to be shot!

E




Emperor1956 -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 10:51:21 AM)

overheard long ago:  'I haven't had sex in so long, I forgot who gets tied up first.'

E.




LadyEllen -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 10:52:53 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

overheard long ago:  'I haven't had sex in so long, I forgot who gets tied up first.'

E.


I do wish you wouldnt reveal our private conversations in public.

Mind you, I also wish you wouldnt use my signature LOL!

E




darchChylde -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 11:17:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

overheard long ago:  'I haven't had sex in so long, I forgot who gets tied up first.'

E.


i know i've seen the exact line in one of the Maxine comic strips




YourShyPet -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 1:19:36 PM)

OMG darchChylde..... THANKS ALOT!!!!!!.... ugh now I'm going to have worse nightmares than I had after watching the Dawn of the Dead remake....<shivers... running zombies....shivers more.... vanilla sex.... curls up in her blankie calling out... Daddy!>


kittin




MrRoberts48381 -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 1:32:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourShyPet

OMG darchChylde..... THANKS ALOT!!!!!!.... ugh now I'm going to have worse nightmares than I had after watching the Dawn of the Dead remake....<shivers... running zombies....shivers more.... vanilla sex.... curls up in her blankie calling out... Daddy!>


kittin


ohhh Kittin nilla bath tub sex  and  fast zombies   haveing lunch on the bus   sounds so HAWT!!! 





YourShyPet -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 1:36:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRoberts48381

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourShyPet

OMG darchChylde..... THANKS ALOT!!!!!!.... ugh now I'm going to have worse nightmares than I had after watching the Dawn of the Dead remake....<shivers... running zombies....shivers more.... vanilla sex.... curls up in her blankie calling out... Daddy!>


kittin


ohhh Kittin nilla bath tub sex  and  fast zombies   haveing lunch on the bus   sounds so HAWT!!! 





<curls up in her blankie, and whines>...... darchChylde!!! SEE WHAT YOU STARTED!!!!... <rocks in her blankie mumbling... no mission position... no mission position>


kittin




CrimsonMoan -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 3:10:05 PM)

*shivers and rubs arms* sooooo coooolllllddddddd

This is why i make sure its never vanil. If it ain't ice cream its gonna be multi flavored and exciting. * packs overnigth bag* Hmmmm rope, candles, paddle, ball gag, hair brush, body wax, liquid latex.....

seriosly that was just wrong man.




HarleyKitty69 -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 3:15:34 PM)

I'm going to have to forward that to my groups ASAP.....
I heard one of the tops was going to get himself nilla pussy tonight ...
AARRRRGGGHHH  THE HORROR




CrimsonMoan -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 3:17:25 PM)

*gags* would you just want to do it without props? wheres the fun? the excitment? the pain?! the marks?!




dcnovice -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 7:02:33 PM)

The story brought to mind a vignette from The Bottoming Book.

The author (whose name I forget, alas, and am too lazy to Google) recounts a conversation with a friend who insisted she had no limits at all. Here's my dramatization:

Author: Everyone has some limits.

Friend: Not me. Whatever my master wants, I'll obey.

Author: So if your master said you were going vanilla for the rest of your relationship, you'd be cool with that?

Long pause

Friend: I'd be out of there so fast! I guess I do have a limit, after all.




favesclava -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 9:55:33 PM)

what an evil child you are!
cant sleep vanilla gonna get me, cant sleep vanilla gonna get me, cant sleep vanilla gonna get me




Craftsman -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 10:49:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

The story brought to mind a vignette from The Bottoming Book.

It could be:
The New Bottoming Book (Paperback)
by Janet W. Hardy (Author), Dossie Easton (Author)
www.librarything.com/work/80512
 
or it could be:
 

The Bottoming Book: How to Get Terrible Things Done to You by Wonderful People
by Dossie Easton
http://www.librarything.com/work/71327




tatangel -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 10:52:49 PM)

The authors of The bottoming Book and several others are Dossie Eaton and Catherine A . Liszt. There you go!




ta2dqt -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 11:28:25 PM)

Just LOVE the story!!! LOVE IT!!!!  [sm=biggrin.gif][sm=crop.gif][sm=lol.gif][sm=ofcourse.gif][sm=ugh.gif][sm=whiteflag.gif][sm=whap.gif]




bbw2switch -> RE: Warning! (6/8/2007 11:48:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrimsonMoan

*gags* would you just want to do it without props? wheres the fun? the excitment? the pain?! the marks?!

thank goddess my gf understand that i can't live on
"van..ni...  van..nil..il  laa ..."

DAMN i just can't say it... with out cringing...[X(]

.






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