Age and honesty (Full Version)

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silhouette -> Age and honesty (5/30/2005 7:42:11 PM)

I am not sure I understand, every woman I have met here asks for honesty, but few are in turn honest with the men they seek to attract. Why do women lie about their age? Honestly, I have spoken to a few woman, and even wanted to meet some. But then, their age proved to be false. Not by a year or so, through oversight, but by 5 or 10. I just do not get it, why lie and then demand honesty of a man. So often women write that they are surprised by the fakes and men who talk and talk then dissapear. Well, it is best to look in the mirror. Sometimes when you want to blame others, it is best to look at yourself instead. Ladies, it best to give honesty to get honesty. If your searching for a 6', 190 pound, attractive, professional, established, well spoken, well educated, blond, blue eyed, man who is willing to give up his life to serve you, well, best to not ever expect to find him except in the fairy tales, oh and especially if you claim to be 40 and your 52.




LadyAngelika -> RE: Age and honesty (5/30/2005 8:01:15 PM)

quote:

Why do women lie about their age?


I think that is a pretty general statement. It might be your experience but it is not everyone's experience and it is definitely not representative of all women.

I've had 3 people lie to me about their age online and they were all men, trying to be younger.

When people lie about anything, it's because they are insecure about that element of themselves. Simple as that.

- LA




junecleaver -> RE: Age and honesty (5/30/2005 9:20:15 PM)

Insecurity. I don't see how your age matters as long as you don't look haggard.




sarbonn -> RE: Age and honesty (5/30/2005 9:22:07 PM)

Age has never meant anything to me, unless it indicates the person is too young (at least for reasons of legality).




asyouwishmaster -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 10:08:13 AM)

I'll chime in on this one. I have met 2 men in real life that lied about their age. One claimed he was 39, and he had to have been in his mid 50's (oh and he failed to mention he had 5 kids). The other said he was also 39 but he was 44---he showed me his drivers license. Age doesn't matter to me at all as long as he is honest and upfront with me. I have no doubt women do it too.




squeak -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 10:27:39 AM)

I know from a BDSM standpoint, a lot of people won't talk to a minor. I've seen people lie about their age to get on BDSM forums/chats and be taken seriously and who want to learn more about the Lifestyle. It's when confronted about the age and then the lying continues is when it's a problem.




sub4hire -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 10:29:48 AM)

quote:

Why do women lie about their age?


Dunno, I never have. to me I don't see the point in starting out in a relationship with someone lying from the beginning, dooming what could very well be a good thing.

I am who I am, they need to accept me or not. No loss on my part either way.




MsIncognito -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 11:54:31 AM)

I know a Domme who lies about her age (44) because she likes the younger guys (mid-20's) and she claims that most of them will cut off their searches aroudn the 39-40 age range. She *thinks* she looks 37 (no comment LOL) so figures it's ok. Personally, I think deception is not really the best way to start a relationship, but perhaps I'm naive that way.




BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 1:04:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: silhouette
I am not sure I understand, every woman I have met here asks for honesty, but few are in turn honest with the men they seek to attract. Why do women lie about their age? Honestly, I have spoken to a few woman, and even wanted to meet some. But then, their age proved to be false. Not by a year or so, through oversight, but by 5 or 10.

attractive, professional, established, well spoken, well educated, blond, blue eyed, man who is willing to give up his life to serve you, well, best to not ever expect to find him except in the fairy tales, oh and especially if you claim to be 40 and your 52.

You're ranting about two things: 1)women lie; yes some people are insecure and lie because they feel the lie is better than their reality; it's bullshit that never ends well, but it's not a female problem, it's a human problem... I'm sure I've known a lot more male liars than women (but that is my biased perspective).
2)What we should expect; not the blonde, blue eyed... How is my expectation any of your business, and how is weather my expectations result in my remaining true to my desires and single unless I find that which I seek any of your business?? I'm not saying I want blonde/blue eyed, but what makes you think it's your job to come announcing to the women here what they can expect simply because your expectations aren't being met?
Sorry to be harsh, but your post invited it..
Welcome to the boards.. [;)] M




RiotGirl -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 1:33:27 PM)

Women lie about their age because people lie in general. The only time i have ever lied about my age was between 15-18 and it was because i was going to clubs and all my friends were 20's and up.

Age as i know it is just a number, a way for our government to classify us and regulate us.

BUT

it also helps base maturity, wisdom, and responsiblity. Its a guidline. i personally feel age really only reflects emotional maturity, yet not always.

Age on the whole is like anything else. Its part of the package that you take a look at and add the rest of the pieces in. Some people find it important enough to lie about, some are insecure, some dont think it matters. Its all relative.

Better question yet. Why do people feel the need to lie about themselves?




BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 3:09:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl
Age on the whole is like anything else. Its part of the package that you take a look at and add the rest of the pieces in. Some people find it important enough to lie about, some are insecure, some dont think it matters. Its all relative.
Better question yet. Why do people feel the need to lie about themselves?

I agree that people shouldn't lie/misrepresent themselves...

As for why do people feel they need to lie about themselves, I already said it's because they're uncomfortable with their truth. I hope the question is in response to the OP and not a question for me since I don't lie about myself.. M




fourpeas -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 4:08:54 PM)

I think that lying about your age is not a good way to enter a relationship. If you want to lie about it to other people, hey, I don't care... I work in the beauty industry... but it just sets the stage for all kinds of deception, not to mention the fact that if you are an observant enough partner, you're going to find out that your partner is being dishonest just by evaluating their life experiences and LISTENING to the things they say and the stories they tell. I just don't think it's a good idea to enter into a relationship with deception. And it is because people are insecure. I am fairly young and naive, but I am always honest about this fact. I think it's just easier to be honest...




LadyAngelika -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 4:18:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIncognito
Personally, I think deception is not really the best way to start a relationship, but perhaps I'm naive that way.


I'd say start a relationship with deception and you will spend the whole relationship making up new lies to cover up your old lies.

- LA




silhouette -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 4:38:56 PM)

Such interesting points of view all, but still I have to disagree. Age is more than a number for a number of reasons, some biological, others spiritual, and others just as a matter of fact. Just before I came back to check to see if there were any replies, I thought to look at pictures in profiles and judge age stated vs. age in appearance. Sadly ladies, those arguing honesty on the part of CM female profiles would not seem to stand the test of the bright light of day.

And I would agree, partners find out anyway. Age is really not just a number. Generations differ, people age, they can do what they once did, it happens, reality sets in, you do not look or act or feel the same. Reproduction, sexual urges, stamina, all change.

Men lie yes, and I did not look at the pictures of men here and compare ages, but wrong is wrong, even if others do it also. Best to admit it don’t you think?




EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 6:06:55 PM)

Silhouette what exactly is your purpose and intent here? I don't think I look like my pics exact age- most people say I look like 19-20 in real life and I know I can dress certain ways t omake me look older or younger.

But really, what's your point of this entire logic? People lie about their age, no surprise there, it's a joke of numerous comedies throughout the centuries.

I'd consider more how you make a first impression on a new board.




silhouette -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 6:43:22 PM)

Respectfully, it's a discussion board and this is a valid discussion don't you think? My first post here, yes, but be assured it is not the first time I have posed in writing an interesting quirk in human nature.

It is not age which really which is relevant here, it’s the lie about age. And yes comedy has poked fun at this human failing, yet how silly and dishonest are we if we lie to others as if our reflection in a mirror will somehow magically change when we do? How foolish!

The reason for my issue was simple and plain, when I am asked to be honest, shouldn’t the rule apply to both people? Yet so often, when I have been asked to be honest, and in turn asked what a woman’s age “really” was, it has created the equivalent of a six year old tantrum, akin perhaps to what has been written here. It’s actually amusing to see.

Anyway, you may be able to dress and look younger as you had said, but you’re not, nor am I or anyone. We are all our age, so perhaps it’s best to act it don’t ya think?

By the way, this is discussion, it’s not you, I can sense you are a very honest real and regular person. It’s about others.




Quivver -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 7:07:46 PM)

"it is best to look in the mirror" yikes, the dreaded mirror!
Although I agree with your 110%. I'm with Riot Girl on this one,
The only time I've lied about age was when I was 15 trying to pass for 21.
how odd to find this post after speaking with someone (male) who admits to
fudging age on their profile. They felt that searches over looked them also due to age. I'm sure I've been passed by being over 45, but that doesn't stop me from commenting on a profile even if they are younger then I.




ScooterTrash -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 7:32:26 PM)

I can't explain why anyone lies, but I do have to stick up for the females, it's not just them. Having the opportunity to be privy to seeing or hearing about male sub's responses to my wife's (a Domme) CM profile, I see untruths about more than just age, from the male population as well.




Lordandmaster -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 8:59:28 PM)

I agree--why are people giving silhouette a hard time about this? It's a legitimate question. Who here doesn't know someone who has lied about her age? Anything that widespread is worth thinking about.




SirKenin -> RE: Age and honesty (5/31/2005 9:15:27 PM)

If Y/you can not be honest with the simple things, then what CAN Y/you be honest with? First impressions matter, and the ability to bold-faced lie even when Y/you know for sure it is going to catch up to Y/you means that Y/you can not be trusted. Trust is key in any relationship.

I would tell them to take a hike.




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