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Age difference in BDSM - 5/31/2005 10:32:52 AM   
Kinkydom69


Posts: 1
Joined: 5/24/2005
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I'm 23 and seeking an older woman, preferably about 40-50 for BDSM activities. But i cant seem to find a woman who is interested in someone as young as me. I enjoy switching, Sometimes i would love to dominate them, but then occasionally i would be happy to be their slave too.

I would of thought it would be exciting for a mid 40's woman to have a young sexy slave at her mercy. On the otherside if i was her master, how humiliating would it be for them to be a slave to someone half their age.

Can anyone point me in the direction of some information/sites about this stuff. Or give me some advice.
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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 5/31/2005 10:35:15 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Be yourself, and don't complain. It's hard for males, it's even harder for younger males.

But, it exists and you can find what you want. Just relax and be yourself.

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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 5/31/2005 10:35:57 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

I'm 23 and seeking an older woman, preferably about 40-50 for BDSM activities. But i cant seem to find a woman who is interested in someone as young as me. I enjoy switching, Sometimes i would love to dominate them, but then occasionally i would be happy to be their slave too.


Go to a munch populated with a lot of fem doms. I'm sure many would love to rob the cradle. Have some nice eye candy on their arm at future parties.

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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 5/31/2005 12:26:01 PM   
MistressFire70


Posts: 378
Joined: 7/25/2004
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
A suggestion: If you're looking to switch, don't list yourself as a dominant. List yourself as a switch. You don't know how many times we get approached by male doms asking to sub and then wanting to turn the tables. It gets old and we tend to see them as wannabes and immature. It also can come across as a falsehood and we tend to think you're just saying whatever you think will get us into bed. Women, dominant or no, just don't like being played. So, if you're looking for someone to switch with, just be honest and say so. You might not get as many responses, but the ones you get should be a little more sincere.


Fire


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you have come to a great chasm. Jump. It's not as wide as you think.

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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 5/31/2005 12:55:30 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kinkydom69
I'm 23 and seeking an older woman, preferably about 40-50 for BDSM activities. But i cant seem to find a woman who is interested in someone as young as me. I enjoy switching, Sometimes i would love to dominate them, but then occasionally i would be happy to be their slave too.

See your name says kinkydom, and you would be happy to be their slave too? Sounds confusing to me, and possibly for dominas who know what they want, and require that he have a good idea of what he is/what he wants.

I hope you are kool for eye candy purposes, and for play as a top or bottom; for relationship purposes however, I would think you would need to be a little more clear about what role you most desire and want to live.
I personally don't/won't date people younger/older by >10years, but plenty of women do, so you should do just fine once you find your comfort zone and are honest with yourself and your lady.. M

< Message edited by BlkTallFullfig -- 5/31/2005 3:24:08 PM >


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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 5/31/2005 2:56:50 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
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That's not bad advice at all. Some dommes can even be flipped.

Trust me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire

Go to a munch populated with a lot of fem doms. I'm sure many would love to rob the cradle. Have some nice eye candy on their arm at future parties.


(in reply to sub4hire)
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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 5/31/2005 10:21:26 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline
What both Fiire and M said. And I will add, that Lam is probably right. You may be able to flip a domme, but then I would say she is a switch also. Most FemDoms are not into the fantasy of being humiliated by a Master half her age. In fact, I would say that FemDoms are not into being humilated at all. I also know I do not fuly comprehend the mentality of the switch. But it is My understanding that they seldom switch with each other. I was advised of that several times when I posted to learn on the "Ask a Switch" forums.
So be careful about how you approach any FemDom. You might just piss them off! And I wouldn't want to be in your shoes when you get the tables turned on you!
Your kink is valid . You just need to be honest about your orientation, and what you seek. Don't say you're a Dom if you want to be a slave. Don't say you're a submissive, if you also want to be a Dom. Say you're a switch and learn about how the switch functions in WIITWD. Then you will probably begin to find some of what you seek.
This is the only link I can give to you for some beginning reading: Ask A Switch


< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 5/31/2005 10:27:42 PM >


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They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 6/3/2005 2:14:56 PM   
pain4hispleasure


Posts: 4
Joined: 5/22/2005
Status: offline
Hi, as a pretty older women who has dated several younger men, I can say that I appreciate what you have to say. Except don't be discouraged, age really doesn't matter. I like younger simply cause younger is attractive, but it's not all that can be appealing! :) You know what I do? Just keep talking to them, like the same way you meet any kind of play partners. There's a yahoo group for older women and younger men as well, search in romance and dating for "olderwomenyoungerman" but that's not kinky though.

< Message edited by pain4hispleasure -- 6/3/2005 2:26:11 PM >

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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 6/4/2005 9:30:35 AM   
Kinkypupper


Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline
Seems to me you are posating yourself as a "Dom" not a sub.


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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 6/4/2005 4:16:26 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
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GOTTA WATCHOUT FOR THEM POSATORS.

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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 6/4/2005 5:06:29 PM   
onceburned


Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline
quote:

GOTTA WATCHOUT FOR THEM POSATORS.


You say Posator and I say Posater,
You sat Domitit and I say Dometet
Posator, Posater
Domitit, Dometet
Let's call the whole thing oof.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 6/5/2005 7:41:02 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
I have younger men contact me nearly every day.

From my own standpoint I do not wish to involve myself with men who are considerably younger than myself. The main reason is that I am not seeking 'play partners'. I would prefer to have partners that I will have longivity with because I prefer a deeper mental connection with a person I interact with. Casual play justy doesn't do anything for me. I don't need the practice... Younger men seem to desire play only with no strings & often bait there come-ons with lines such as ... open to see what developes. I highly doubt that a large percentage of these men will actually commit to a long-term involvement with women 15 to 20 yrs older.

Now I am not saying this never happens!

Several years back I was involved with a yoounger male submissive... 10yrs younger. We were a good match but he had a desire to have a child of his own & I was out of the baby making business by that time. His release was for that reason. I cared enough for him that I would not keep him from being able to pursue that desire. I can see where other women may consider this as well when a younger man attempts to court them.

Now as to the switch, flip, top, bottom thingy... topping & bottoming is not directly associated with being dominant or submissive. Top/bottom is a position within BDSM interaction, dominant/submissive is a particular mindset one hardwired to be within their personal relationships.

As for me... I do not flip... Popeye 101... I y'am what I y'am! I won't & cannot even consider being anything but a dominant. Would I bottom? No.

I am very much in agreement with GoddessDustyGold. If a female dominant 'flips' for someone, she was most likely a switch to begin with... just like the many male dominants that contact us saying they want to experiment/explore their submissive side. I avoid these men as well. I see it as a very self-serving attitude. They want, they wish to experience... me me me, I I I ... & when they have had their fill... off to greener pasture. Only under the most respected & fully negotiated situations have I ever topped & fellow dominant. This I consider a very private & personal experience & I am quite honored by those who came to me to share in what was considered a ritual purging.

I also agree that primary partners shouldn't switch with each other. Kind of confuses the mental aspects of it all in my opinion.

My best advice to Kinkydom69... be yourself & express yourself as honestly as you can to others. If you are a switch... then present yourself as such. Don't blame the femdoms you contact as being at fault if they do not desire to play by your rules, they of course have their own rules... you just need to find someone who compatible & the best way to do that is to find out what it is you really want in the first place.

MstrssPassion

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RE: Age difference in BDSM - 6/7/2005 4:07:13 PM   
asissyforher


Posts: 228
Joined: 5/20/2005
From: iowa now..maybe move soon.
Status: offline
yes, list as switch..it is a different listing. and list as bi and not straight. it all matters how your ad is placed.
asissy



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"still looking for a real life domme..no more plastic wannabes for me"

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