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Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 12:50:41 PM   
Trampler


Posts: 580
Joined: 12/31/2006
Status: offline 		In my search for a Mistress I have noticed that alot of them are submissive to a Man, and I was curious why is this so, what appeals to that set-up? Any comments,opinions,are welcome

*Understand I do not have a problem with this,it is just out of curiousity*
* Also overall I do not seek a Domme who has this situation,unless her domming other people is completely seperate from her Dom's*
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 12:55:48 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		It's their orientation.  They are fulfilled in submission, but now want an outlet for their dominance.

Most females tend to be comfortable in submission to one person, and prefer to be dominant to all others.  They especially feel more comfortable dominating other females.

It's one of the more sneaky ways for a dom to get his "third" without being threatening as 'the dom.'

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Trampler)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 1:33:24 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		i'm a daughter-submissive to Daddy and i prefer to have a male "pet" (which i currently do)  ...i'm not  nor do i want to be a "Domme" to him or any others i happen to meet. my "pet" is treated like a friend than a male slave though we do rolepay sometimes while chatting.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 4:44:16 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		I so don't get that, its not Me, I'm a Domina, end of story---I'm not knocking those that do--buw I always wonder if that doesn't mean thay are a switch??
 


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Mistress Hathor


(in reply to Trampler)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 4:50:00 PM   
sleazybutterfly


Posts: 2801
Joined: 5/15/2006
Status: offline 		I am a slave, but I have always wanted a pet male or female of my own.  I don't know if this makes me a switch, or just a slave that knows exactly what makes her happy.  Anyone that I had would not be under my M...but would be under me.  Perhaps it's because I am not submissive to anyone in my life other than M, this feels like a natural next step for me.

_____________________________

~Flutterby
~Curvylicious
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly.
Life is not a popularity contest, it's better to be hated for what you believe, than loved for a lie.

(in reply to MHOO314)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 4:59:54 PM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		I was a Domme long before I met M, and continue to be so despite having submitted to him. The reason for me is that while I am a dominant personality and choose to dominate, I am sexually submissive. That is why I don't have sex with my submissives, and why I am delighted to have a partner I trust implicitly with whom I can let go of all my control during sex.

Once I submitted in the bedroom I found that I could submit in other ways also, and M and I both prefer D/s that extends outside the bedroom. Therefore he is my Dom, and that makes us both happy. I am still dominant, however, and therefore I seek someone to dominate. Neither M or I minds if my subs are separate in power exchange and sexual play from M, but they are expected to interact with him on a familial basis, hanging out at home, having dinner together, etc. They are expected to treat him with respect but not required to submit to him or obey.

If someone wanted to submit to us both we would enjoy it heartily, but the reason I seek is for myself, not for him. I would not have been seeking a Dom if it had happened the other way (found a sub first) simply because I didn't know until I met M that I wanted to submit, or could submit fully.

~E

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(in reply to sleazybutterfly)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 5:25:39 PM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline 		I think the reason you see it mentioned more on women's profiles is that the ladies are more open & comfortable about sharing this info than the men are.

Don't you be thinking for a second that men aren't capable of desiring this very same set up... just ask the dominant ladies how many emails they get from "dominant men" who don't wish to make it public knowledge.

_____________________________

MstrssPassion


(in reply to Elorin)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 5:46:33 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Some women are just comfortable in a set of relationships such as this. Some aren't. It's kinda like being poly; either you are or you aren't. For me, when it comes to a relationship with a man, I want either someone who will submit or someone who will be and equal in every day life, but top me for sex. Of course, I can top from the bottom like hell, too. LOL

Master Fire


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The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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(in reply to Trampler)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 5:47:41 PM   
LadyHeart


Posts: 561
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Elorin has explained it well. I am turned on by subbing to my Master/husband but I get a buzz from Domme-ing others (male or female)
I do not label myself as a switch, because they are two different things. I am on CollarMe as a Dominant because I am not in the market for a Master, and make that very clear in my profile. But I am not a fan of labels, because a Dominant can enjoy some of the experiences that a bottom does - Dominance comes from the mind, not the body. I know some very Dominant people who still enjoy being spanked. Some men enjoy anal play without being homosexual. Life isn't black and white. As a straight female I will play with another woman, yet would not describe myself as bi. I am comfortable enough with who and what I am to do what feels right to me.
:))
LH

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(in reply to MstrssPassion)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 5:51:25 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline 		The guys lift the heavy stuff :) 

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I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to Trampler)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 6:33:05 PM   
PairOfDimes


Posts: 324
Joined: 7/20/2006
Status: offline 		I think it's because some people like to have multiple personal relationships, and to take different authority positions in those relationships. In other words, some people like both to dominate and to submit, and they like to dominate certain people and submit to certain people.

Also, tons of people like to top (give sensation) or bottom (receive sensation) without much in the way of d/s. We're often imprecise in expression, so "submit" and "dominate" can be confused with "tie up" and "spank." So it's quite possible that the women you're describing like to submit regularly and primarily, but also like to tie people up, either functioning as equals with the person being bound or as service tops, doing what the person being bound asks.

I imagine that people who simultaneously nurture both relationships as a dominant and relationships as a submissive find each role appealing for the same reason us single-role folks do. They just happen to like both sides of the coin. It's not too strange for a person ito be dominant in certain relationships and submissive in certain other relationships. Most of us work, so we're okay with answering to a supervisor and supervising subordinates. Presumably, those of us non-switches can deal with roles contrary to our preferred private status--i.e. dominants are okay with answering to bosses, and submissives are okay with wielding authority. Similarly, perhaps, those of us with traditional families are okay with deferring to those senior to us and guiding those junior to us. When I think about it this way, I find it easy to understand *how* a person would be submissive in one personal relationship and dominant in another, even if I can't properly empathize with that choice.


(in reply to Trampler)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 6:41:12 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I so don't get that, its not Me, I'm a Domina, end of story---I'm not knocking those that do--buw I always wonder if that doesn't mean thay are a switch??
 

i asked Daddy that when he gave me permission to have a male "pet"  ...He replied that this doesn't make me a "switch" or "Domina" because He knows (as well as i do) that i'm submissive more than anything else. so i'm just a submissive with a "pet".


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to MHOO314)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 7:24:43 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		My situation is closest to Elorin's, in that I discovered My Dominant side first and it remains a powerful force. However, from My early explorations, I knew there was at least a bottom in me that wanted to experience and feel it for myself ... and that has evolved into a full sub/slave mindset with Master. That part of me is now totally fulfilled and i can't imagine being sub to anyone else unless, god forbid, something happened to Him. However, My Domme side is very much needing to find a 24/7 sub/slave, someone who views their submission to Me in the same kinds of ways i view my submission to Master. Proving a tad difficult to find but I'm not about to give up! Had a lovely play sub (can only be an occasional encounter) for the weekend which was great ... but just whets My appetite for more!

In M/my ideal situation ... I would have a full time sub/slave who primarily serves Me, he (or maybe she) would be under My control, they would be My responsibility. However, My overall Dominance is still under Master's ultimate control, although He doesn't seek to exercise that greatly. At the moment He keeps watch over who I meet, out of concern for My wellbeing, and has the say over when. However, should I find one who comes to live with Us then He would be happy with that person for Us to take that step, and I would expect Him to largely allow the situation to evolve through My control. In the past when We were trying poly with My former CD hubby who turned out not to be sub in any way, Master tried to keep out of things as much as possible, although He was always a sounding board when I had problems (which was often!). My sub/slave would be expected to be respectful to Master, to assist Me to serve Him at meals etc. Unless all the people were wanting this, there would not necessarily be sexual service between My sub and Master.

I don't call M/myself a switch as I don't feel that I switch from one persona to the other if both people are around Me. Also I don't switch with the same person (well, I did first Domme Master and then We switched but that's a RESET not a switch LOL!). My friends coined the term "Duality" to describe Me as both parts operate virtually simultaneously ie it is easy and natural to give My sub an order and follow that with a "Yes Master" and obey His order. That's definitely My preferred way to live, to have the 2 personas free to work together, to flow. Nonetheless, I can understand that not everyone is wired this way, there are times when I almost envy those who are wired to be ONLY Dominant or ONLY submissive. Then you only have to find one compatible partner! But there's no denying who I am ... just have to try to find 2 people to share M/me!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 7:32:27 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I know that it wouldn't be the type of relationship for me, unless he understood that I was the Alpha. I couldn't be a dominant female who subs to someone else I just do not have it in me. But I think its ok for those who do enjoy it. 

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to MaamJay)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 7:37:00 PM   
RealDom69


Posts: 64
Joined: 4/7/2005
Status: offline 		From a Doms perspective;   I allow my sub/wife to play with others but only as a Domme, i wouldn't like somebody else to be in control of her so we don't go there. She likes to dominate occasionally and therefore has needs that i can't meet, and I like to have other subs too, after all variety is the spice of life, and as BDSM often does get sexual it goes without saying for us that we have to like each others partners too, I will not play with a sub that doesn't like my wife and vice versa..  we are both true to our marriage and our marriage coms first...

:))
Johnny Reble

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"Winners make things happen; losers let things happen."

(in reply to Trampler)
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RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 7:44:40 PM   
Rafters


Posts: 266
Joined: 3/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314
I so don't get that, its not Me, I'm a Domina, end of story---I'm not knocking those that do--buw I always wonder if that doesn't mean thay are a switch??


"Switch" implies they explore both aspects in the same persona.
This thread is more about people who are always being this persons abso-fucking-lutly, 100% Domme and that persons closet subbie.

Some Domme's may be mostly Dominant, but once in a while they want to operate without a facade, without any self control.

To say whatever their gag lets them.
To expose both their bodies secrets and their inner soul's to a higher power.
To let a blindfold soak up their tears of bliss.
To do anything their restraints let them.
To blow off steam in such perverse ways that if their subbies saw it, they would squeal in outrage because "But a True Domme (TM) wouldn't allow that to be done to them"

This way, once it's out of their system, they're free to climb back aboard their ironclad Domme persona and go back to being The Lady in charge, with no one being the wiser.

(in reply to MHOO314)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 8:08:15 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

It's their orientation.  They are fulfilled in submission, but now want an outlet for their dominance.

Most females tend to be comfortable in submission to one person, and prefer to be dominant to all others.  They especially feel more comfortable dominating other females.

It's one of the more sneaky ways for a dom to get his "third" without being threatening as 'the dom.'


I haven't read all the way through to see if this has been addressed, bit I have a HUGE problem with the statement that MOST females tend to be comfortable in submission to one person, and I imagine there are other female dominants on here to echo that sentiment. There may be a alot of women, but I would like to see where you get "MOST" from and that it "is their orientation".  It may be yours, but there are ALOT of female dominants out there.  What led you to arrive at MOST instead of "SOME"?

edited to add;  Disclaimer!!!!!I see nothing wrong with the scenario if it is right for some, I just have a problem with the word MOST.

< Message edited by kc692 -- 6/12/2007 8:11:53 PM >

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 8:27:56 PM   
slaverosebeauty


Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
Status: offline 		Submissive to one and Dominant to others, that equals switch in my book. Switch implies just that, able to 'switch; roles which is what is being talked about here.

Everyone is born with both characteristics, to be dominant and to be submissive, its just to what 'level' just as everyone has both male and female characteristics. It depends on what you do with what you 'have' that makes the difference.

So a bottom-type who has a 'pet' or a 'slave' is a switch in my book. It makes sence and its logical.

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"Friends live on in our hearts, regardless if they are here or not."

(in reply to kc692)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 8:42:46 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		You know I love you, kc.

quote:

ORIGINAL: kc692

I see nothing wrong with the scenario

(in reply to kc692)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom - 6/12/2007 8:46:25 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline 		I see nothing wrong with the scenario if it is right for some..... look again, I did not intimate that was me babes, just the opposite..quit with the wishful thinkin and come see me, babes!!!!!!!



_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 20
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