Psychological condition now defined : Medleyitis (Full Version)

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Termyn8or -> Psychological condition now defined : Medleyitis (6/18/2007 7:39:08 PM)

I will refer to this person as Medley. That is his last name, and I see no reason to give his first name. Gotta have a little respect for the Man's privacy.

I have observed Medleytism in quite a few individuals over the years. I haven't seen Medley in many years, but his disorder cut deeply into my memory. Medleyism causes many divorces and other problems. This is no joke, not at all.I am attempting to explain an espect of human behavior, and this is a bad one. It inhibits mant from getting the most out of life, and believe it or not, I care.

Met Medley a long time ago, we were all renting at the time. He got evicted from a nearby apartment and I stored some of his stuff. The landlord didn't like it but the cops said it was legfal, so fukim. Eventually we wound up renting an apartment to Medley, and that ended badly. Medley has among the shortest tempers I have ever run across, but not until you get to know him well.

I have refined and distilled the knowledge of a couple of decades here. I see this condition in other people too. I have seen it in alot of divorced people, if you want to take that as an indication. I am getting into something that I admit I do not know everything about, but that will not stop me.

Medleyism is a condition whereby as you get closer emotionally to the person they become meaner, nastier, to the point of being abusive if necessary. Why is it necessary ? Because they have been hurt or abandoned by someone in their life. Even if it didn't happen, they percieve it that way.

If you have Medlyism, you get close, but when things get closer and you are reallyu going to hook up, you push them away. And that is because you do not want to become vulnerable again, and get hurt again. Remember it doesn't matter if the hurt was real or percieved, we are talking their mental state, and that is based on their perception.

But I see my buddy Hunter with the same affliction. He loves his olady, but they just can't do it. They can't let go of the bullshit and see what is real. They both have a pretty good dose of Medleyism.

And I have no idea how to help them. But I must try. That is me, and that is how it is.

T




Termyn8or -> RE: Psychological condition now defined : Medleyitis (6/18/2007 11:21:56 PM)

Oh boy I had to do it. But it was time.

"You got this fat broad, and for some reason you think all your friends are after her, wake up. None of us fucking want her. She is too big for me and Jack, Mike, the other Mike, Ron, Chris and even Joel, who is big as a house. Get your head out your fucking ass. None of us want her, and it is not just because she is fat, she is also fucked up in the head". Geez people. I'll fuck her when hell freezes over. It is bad enough just being friends. Everything is a constant turmoil. I do not put up with shit like this. Period.

She is a nice person, but has a bad case of Medleyitis. I will not be watched or spied upon. That would be an instant end to it.

Medleyism, Medleyitis, I cannot seem to find a cure. Getting on hard drugs and hitting rock bottom works well, but I think it a bit drastic.

I am struggling for words here, but I am determined to express this.

I have seen so much Medleyism and Medleyitis I am sick to death of it. People afraid to trust because of past experiences. And everybody thinks everybody else is just like them, or their abusers of the past. They are taught that we are all the same, and that hurts them throughout life.

The saddest words of mouth or pen,
Surely are "It might have been".

Medleyitis is not a word I chose lightly. If I were at Medley's house and fell all over him and spilled his drink and plate of food, I would get "Watch where you'ere wlking". If his olady did it, he would damnear kill her. In his mind she is closer to him, and therefore more dangerous.

I mentioned this because I see it alot. Do a self check and if you see it in yourse;f, at least be aware of it. I see it so much. Realize that you are with your Woman, not among enemies. That high defense shield is not needed right now.

You (we) switch modes in microseconds. Possibly at the drop of a hat. Or it could be one word. Whatever it is, once you switch modes it is hard to get back. How you got screwed over in the past all comes back, including the feeling, and then you react based on that, which escalates the situation. Once that happens she might have a better reason than you to feel insecure. Because when you switch modes you are out of control.

I have seen guys threaten to kill the children if the Wife refused to comply with his wishes. I have seen guys that just will not calm down. They'll walk into another room and talk to others calmly and quietly, but back to the olady it is back up to 122dB. Yelling. Why ?

Ammqa tell yall something right now. I don't care if only dudes are reading this or what, but I will make this public right here and now.

You nor anyone else will raise their voice to me in anger in my house. And if you do it somewhere else, give thought to an escape route.

I admit there are times it sounds as if I am raising my voice, but I usually am not. I do it very rarely.

In my profile, I should make it more clear. I like to bottom, but not sub.

Tellya bout this little adventure. (in psychology)

My car cracked. It was a substantial Buick but not any longer, so I bought this theft recovery off my buddy, and it was in my buddy's olady's name.

I call her brother in law because it also needs a windshield. Within a fucking hour my phone rings. "Don't drive that car, I will call the police and report it stolen" I replied that it wouldn't be her plates but before I could get the part out thatr that was what matters she starts yelling at me. "You drive that car you are going to jail".

Well, they don't call me Terminator for nothing, and it is an fact she that coined the name. I kept my cool, I ain't no fool. I said "It is not wise to take that tone with me, but don't worry about it" and I hung up. Now she is pissed at me, as if I owe her some subserviance or something.

Her Husband tells me that she has never ever under any circumstances, apologized in her whole life.

I have nothing to apologize for. In nice even tones I said what I said. That was not a threat, except in that remember this day when you have a flat tire and nobody else is answering their phone.

I am telling you it is not wise to fuck with me. You call me "Jeff I am stuck on the freeway right by your house". Wait until the tone of voice I use when I say "REALLY". What ahppens next is up to me. You either freeze to death or..............

Wanna yell at me and get in my face now ?

I have mentally defeated one of the mentally strongest Men I have ever run across. I have chained him up and stuffed two feet of dildo up his ass as wide as a salami. Doesn't phase me a bit. A tasteful experience for me ? NO. But I have done alot worse. To keep the elaboration to a minimum I'll simply say this. And this is true.

I don't have any enemies, but I used to. And I do not want any more. I shll not mention this again, but understand me.

I will do everything I can not to ever make another enemy. I really mean that. Any enemies I might have are very old or in prison or something. Life is good this way.

I posted this because if anyone sees this in themself, they should try to understand it. This is not an instant cure, and never was intended to be. Reecogniing the problem is still the first step. Nothing will fix a problem until that problem is identified. That is an absolute, I don't think I need alot of websites and shit to prove it. Do you ?

Actually, nature does solve some problems on her own now and then, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

I dunno if this was worth typing. If you know someone that fcits my description and can talk to them, do so. If you like them and they are your friend, and they explode, if they say hit their partner, they have hurt themselves manyfold. That is a violation of trust.

I don't have a caplock key so you know how hard it is gouing to be.

WHENEVER YOU RAISE A HAND IN ANGER YOU HAVE LOST ALREADY, AND EVEN THE THREAT OF IT, THE SAME.

Think of this, if you can't convince others that you are right, doesn't that bring up the possibility that you are wrong ?

People now don't want to think about shit. Introspection is at it's worst since the days of the dinosaur.People are more concerned with their hair color than trhe safety of other drivers on the road. And that is the truth.

But not us. We got as little society growing here. Eventually we wil get some candidates up. And I teach psychology and everything I can every chance I get. I want our people strong and smart. I INSIST on it.

We grow. There becomes more and more of us. The requirement for getting into this is a desire to learn and use the knowledge to make the world better.

You don't understand quite what is going on here, so I will out with it. We are a mutual help and educational group, and I am the leader.

For example, if I hear from my mechanic "I don't see why we don't do it this way". he knows a lengthy explanation wil follow. He usually does things my way nowadays.

You think we got the tunes cranked up and are burning a joint when they come over ? Hell no, the tines are usually off :-) We have sane discussions, we talk about issues. I get pissed off when Scratch brings up that he wants to buy another motorcycle. Fuck that, we have alot more important issues to deal with, Go shopping, or go color. Whatever.

Whatever. I posted this mainly so some could get a look, possibly see something, and maybe have a positive effect. If you see Medleyitis in a mate, address it immediately. If you see it in one of your friend's or relative's mates, address the subject.

If you are so distant you can't address the subject, oh well.

People with Medleyitis are blind to their condition. Realize that to take on the problem is a significant undertaking. I am not an armchair shrink, I am a chair shrink. By that I mean spending hours with people. You get tired, too fucking bad. In for a penny in for a pound.

And leyt me tell you all one thing, if you go fuck with people's heads like a shrink, you are in for the long haul. There is no "Your hour is up". If anyone really wants to help people, you can't quit. If you are going to quit don't do it.

It took me four hours with this one couple. And then a few more hours on each end.

Now I know why these guys make $80 an hour. You have to moderate a few things when all is well. You also have to interpret. Then you have to interrupt, forcefully, to teach them not to be so poisonous to each other.

I did all this and they were happy as larks. But it fell apart. "Where you at ?", "I am two feet from the gas pump", "You muthafucker, you are only eighteen inches from the gas pump. I can't take your lies anymore. You remember you lied to me about which hand you wiped your ass with and now this ? We are through".

I think at that point I would literally be rolling on the floor laughing. Whether it was directed at me or not.

I think I am going to retire from the field of psychology. If you are too much of a stupid fuck to make a relatrionship work, be alone then. Sometimes I wonder how some guys even get a Woman in the first place, being so disfunctional.

At the moment, I'll just blame it on the media and go to bed.

T




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