ProtagonistLily
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NOTE: this is a companion thread. You might want to read Seven Classes of Submissives first to get the full effect. (edited on 6/8/05)
This is not my first post to these forums. I have been actively involved in the lifestyle in the real life, referenceable scene for over 6 years. I carry some pretty significant papers to prove it as well.
I'm open to a non-elusive, real time relationship with a Dominant. I suppose standing around like a wall flower ain't gonna do it. I've met a gazillion Doms and talked to them, played with some, and even was collared to one. The following essay is a result of those conversations, particularly from those Dominants that think there is some magical formula and are waiting until they 'the one' which will probably render them old and more undesirable than they already are.
This is tongue in cheek for the most part.
I think all Dominants can be classified under a series of seven classifications. This is not to say, that any particular Dominant fits precisely into one of these classes, rather, that any one or possibly all of these classes combine to comprise his Dominat personality. Thus, a Dominant may be 100% class 1, or 20% class one, 30% class 4 and 50% class 5. For those who dislike being pigeon-holed, I suggest that you see the thread "Seven Classes of Submissives" and chew him a new one. He started this ~grin~
I'm sure there will be feedback...no doubt about that
Class 1:
My way or the Highway Dom.: This man is not Dominant at all. He can "act" like his conception of a Dominant, but what he really is is a control freak in Dom clothing.
Class 2:
The Abuser: This is the guy who enjoys beating the crap out of a woman and found out that he can cloak his abusive behavior under the guise of Dominance.
Class 3:
The guy who can't get laid vanilla: This is the guy who's striking out in the bars and thinks that if he calls himself Dominant all the kinky sluts will show up and beg to screw him.
Class 4:
The Desperate Dom. This is a man who's dying for a relationship. For what ever reason he hasn't managed to land someone and believes if he can just act Dominant enough, he'll find himself a slave who will always be there.
Class 5:
The Manager. This is a man who finds that he's so good at managing his own life, he should managed someone elses. Where better to look for a woman who needs micromanaging than "the Lifestyle". Management Dom frequently is an older man who is attracted to the younger submissives. Generally these kinds of Doms will stunt a girl's growth to the point that when the relationship is over, she can barely cook for herself or pay her bills on her own.
Class 6:
The troublemaker: This is a Dom with some serious self esteem issues. He's the guy in the corner pissed off because all these other 'jerks' have found themselves a girl and he's better, stronger, faster, etc, than they are damnit. He's likely to be someone other people want to avoid in the scene, and more than likely he's going to be sitting in that chair a bitter, unattractive jerk for a long time.
Class 7:
The Taker: This is a Dom who finds that his truest expression of self is by taking from others. He finds pleasure by putting his needs before everyone else's. He seeks to control so as to be able to be true to his selfish nature.
I think that if one evaluates a potential Dominant on the basis of these classifications, one can also decide whether to stop reading the errant, unqualified rantings of people you don't know or join a local BDSM group and meet real live people you can discuss things and relate to.
I hope everyone realizes the degree of 'tongue in cheek' this was written with, but also sees my point.
Lily
< Message edited by ProtagonistLily -- 6/8/2005 2:36:25 PM >
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"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~
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