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Learning to cum on command - 6/27/2007 2:29:24 PM

pussinbootz

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Hi there

MM would like me to cum on command.... and I would love to be able to do it... he can do it by text (strangely enough).. by telling me what he wants to do to me... but when we're together and he growls in my ear "cum for me" it doesn't seem to work so well... almost like the pressure gets in the way.

I know that in general terms if you focus on cumming it's less likely to happey but it seems this is something a lot of people do so I'm looking to my fellow subs for hints on how to learn this...

What can I do to help myself learn this?

Puss

edited to correct dumb-ass spelling

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/27/2007 2:33:25 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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The fact that you can do it in one context but not another just means you need to transfer the connection you have there into the connection you have in this situation as well. This might mean ramping down on the direct pleasure, or having you masturbate and orgasm first to get your body primed and then ordered to orgasm, or some other thing. Play around it with it and see what happens.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_588912/mpage_2/key_orgasm%252Ccontrol/tm.htm#592158
orgasm on command?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_412753/mpage_1/key_cum%252Ccommand/tm.htm#412758
cum control

http://www.collarchat.com/m_313958/mpage_4/key_orgasm%252Ccommand/tm.htm#318568
cum on command

http://www.collarchat.com/m_400934/mpage_1/key_cum%252Ccommand/tm.htm#400996
orgasm on demand

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/27/2007 3:11:43 PM

chellekitty

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i think a lot of tips can be taken from hypnosis...working the sub into a "altered state of mind" then introducing the trigger word(s) like the whole act like a chicken thing...it takes work...but also remember that if you want to do this its something that could stick around until someone removes the suggestion...not sure exactly how because i still have it...i can't cum without permission...even when masturbating, i have to imagine someone giving me permission and/or ordering me to do it...kind of frustrating when having sex with a nilla guy...also be careful with programming the trigger, because you don't want to just react to someone saying the word, you want to react to a specific someone saying the word...cumming from a panicked "you've got to come now" from your mom is not cool...
good luck...
chelle
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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/27/2007 3:21:36 PM

santalia

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Greetings

One way i have found helps is to listen to His voice...and i don't necessarily mean what He's saying, but just His voice itself. Think about what you're feeling when you're reading what He's typing to you. Think about how you feel when He is kissing you, touching you, when you're in the middle of a very hot scene with Him. If you allow yourself to begin feeling the way you do when He is typing what He wants to do to you, or when He's actually doing it to you, only by listening to His voice, then you should begin working yourself toward orgasm even before He tells you to cum for Him.

To put it in a nutshell, use His voice as if it were foreplay. No matter what He is saying, you can make it into something that turns you on to the point you're trembling with the need to cum...you just have to work at it and retrain your mind and body to react.

i hope this helps

Well wishes

-santalia{JR}

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/28/2007 2:40:13 AM

pussinbootz

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Hi.. thanks for all the great tips.

I don't want to be in a position where I need permission to cum, just to be able to cum when he tells me to.. does that make sense? Sort of an additional thing to when he's doing stuff that would normally make me cum.

Puss

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/28/2007 4:10:03 AM

chellekitty

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yes, it makes perfect sense, i don't like that i can't cum without permission...but the ex that trained me to cum on command (which to me, btw, it might be different to you, means to cum without any sort of stimulation, mental or physical) either didn't know to make the destinction or wanted the control...
perhaps someone kinky with hypnosis background could help more than me, i don't understand the process fully, i just know its out there...
again, good luck
chelle

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/28/2007 4:20:27 AM

SubinMaine

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quote:

ORIGINAL: santalia

Greetings

One way i have found helps is to listen to His voice...and i don't necessarily mean what He's saying, but just His voice itself. Think about what you're feeling when you're reading what He's typing to you. Think about how you feel when He is kissing you, touching you, when you're in the middle of a very hot scene with Him. If you allow yourself to begin feeling the way you do when He is typing what He wants to do to you, or when He's actually doing it to you, only by listening to His voice, then you should begin working yourself toward orgasm even before He tells you to cum for Him.

To put it in a nutshell, use His voice as if it were foreplay. No matter what He is saying, you can make it into something that turns you on to the point you're trembling with the need to cum...you just have to work at it and retrain your mind and body to react.

This is exactly how it works/worked for me as well. i could never reach this point with "others"...so i think it would be safe to say your level of commitment and care for your Sir would certainly play a large role also...

i now find it very easy to focus on his voice, just the timbre of it is enough to make my knees weak *smile*....

Another thing to try would be intense visualization. Sort of self-training for lack of a better description...good luck with your journey *smile*

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/28/2007 5:18:33 AM

pussinbootz

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at the moment he's only trying to do it while we are playing... so in theory it should be easy... he's working on me and I should be able to do it there and then... I can cum when I'm ready but I want to do it when he wants me to...

maybe it's just a case of playing more and time, but I'll definitely remember to pay attention to his voice... he's only tried it a couple of times, but me being me, I want to be perfect at it straight away!!

We're both fairly new to bdsm so we're both learning as we go.

< Message edited by pussinbootz -- 6/28/2007 5:20:37 AM >

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 6/28/2007 5:33:05 AM

sweetnurseBBW

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It is something that you both need to learn together. You both have to listen to ques from your body. Relaxing and not having pressure on about it makes it easier to achieve. It is something that takes time to learn, patience is a must.

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 7/4/2007 1:40:38 AM

demostex

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I've seen and tried hypnosis to program me to respond to certain stimulus. It turns out that the act of reading the words on screne don't really effect me that much, but the wave sounds used to enduce the hypnotic state cause me to get a raging hardon and on extended training sessions actually leak precum without any physical contact at all.

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 7/4/2007 7:59:48 AM

lighthearted

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I got so wrapped up in the pressure that it actually set me back, sexually. I would recommend that if you are feeling pressure, you might want to put the idea aside for awhile and revisit it when the idea feels less stressful. orgasms can be delicate and tricky things at times, especially when there's a lot going on inside one's head.

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RE: Learning to cum on command - 7/4/2007 1:21:20 PM

BoundDragon

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I find I am a very sensory person.... the slightest touch (even feeling his breath on my neck) can make me wet.

I have learnt to take this even further so when he does growl those sweet words in my ear its like opening the flood gates... I cum, & I cum hard.

How did I learn this??? It was actually self taught... back when I was single.

I used to lie flat on my back in bed with the lights off & my eyes shut... I'd trace feathers or a finger along body parts learning to respond to them... the more I responded the stronger it felt... making me respond all the more.

Once I had my boyfriend I soon learnt that your body could react to your other senses the same way.... very soon I had learnt he had a certain tone when he used certain phrases that just sent shivers down my spine....
Very soon the words "Cum for me" really could bring me to orgasm as my body was just waiting for it... kept in suspense until....... oh sweet release lol.

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