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Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 6:54:43 AM

Jez223

Posts: 13
Joined: 6/29/2007
Status: offline

Been with my Master for about a week ( Still a young blood ) and every day when he gets home from work, he expects an interesting and exciting Email. If he does not get one, he will not talk to me (Emotionally devestating). Seeing i have to do one of these per day for him . . . im begining to run out of things to talk about that would interest him. Could anyone give me any suggestions to keep my Emails naughty, yet exciting ? (First post, wooo be nice :P )

< Message edited by Jez223 -- 6/29/2007 6:55:13 AM >

Post #: 1

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 6:59:31 AM

SeeksOnlyOne

Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline

been with? a week? on-line? emotionally devastated? arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

_____________________________

it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 2

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:02:10 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

i usually write about the mundane, uninteresting as well as the exciting, fun things in my emails ...i type out my thoughts, concerns, questions and opinions to conversations we had the day before ...also Daddy's the first person to get a copy of my reviews before sending them to the station.

i apologize ahead of time if i wasn't any help

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 3

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:06:06 AM

Jez223

Posts: 13
Joined: 6/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

SeeksOnlyOne

quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

i usually write about the mundane, uninteresting as well as the exciting, fun things in my emails ...i type out my thoughts, concerns, questions and opinions to conversations we had the day before ...also Daddy's the first person to get a copy of my reviews before sending them to the station.

i apologize ahead of time if i wasn't any help

Much more helpful than SeeksOnlyOne :P - TY sambamanslilgirl

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 4

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:12:08 AM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jez223
If he does not get one, he will not talk to me

This would be my cue to run like the wind. In my personal opinion, a "dominant" who "dominates" in this manner doesn't have a clue, especially since you are just starting out. He's going to end up "mastering" someone to whom he will not even speak if something doesn't go his way? Nah.....not for me.

quote:

im begining to run out of things to talk about that would interest him.

Another bad omen.....you have been together one week and you have already run out of things to talk about

? Hon, can you see why this may not be the ideal situation?

I can't speak for anyone else but in my situation, Master and I have more to talk about everyday than we did the day before and it certainly doesn't all involve sex or something kinky. If you are already having trouble with this, I would suggest you speak with him about it. Trouble is - or at least it seems from this small slice of the picture - that he's not all that in to open communication. I mean, if he's refusing to speak with you when you don't have that daily email waiting, it seems he's starting off on the wrong foot. Imagine how it could go from here. In the very beginning of a new relationship, people tend to put on their best self/behavior in order to attract their desired partner. If this is his best behavior, imagine how it may deteriorate once you're together and you need to discuss something very important to you. Is he then just going to refuse to talk about it like he's doing over these e-mails? I don't know but it sure seems like a possibility.

I would urge you to really think about if this is what you desire. Best of luck..............slave luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 5

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:14:34 AM

imthatacheyouhav

Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jez223
If he does not get one, he will not talk to me

This would be my cue to run like the wind. In my personal opinion, a "dominant" who "dominates" in this manner doesn't have a clue, especially since you are just starting out. He's going to end up "mastering" someone to whom he will not even speak if something doesn't go his way? Nah.....not for me.

quote:

im begining to run out of things to talk about that would interest him.

Another bad omen.....you have been together one week and you have already run out of things to talk about? Hon, can you see why this may not be the ideal situation?

I can't speak for anyone else but in my situation, Master and I have more to talk about everyday than we did the day before and it certainly doesn't all involve sex or something kinky. If you are already having trouble with this, I would suggest you speak with him about it. Trouble is - or at least it seems from this small slice of the picture - that he's not all that in to open communication. I mean, if he's refusing to speak with you when you don't have that daily email waiting, it seems he's starting off on the wrong foot. Imagine how it could go from here. In the very beginning of a new relationship, people tend to put on their best self/behavior in order to attract their desired partner. If this is his best behavior, imagine how it may deteriorate once you're together and you need to discuss something very important to you. Is he then just going to refuse to talk about it like he's doing over these e-mails? I don't know but it sure seems like a possibility.

I would urge you to really think about if this is what you desire. Best of luck..............slave luci

Luci speaks the truth here ...and exactly what i was thinking...you may want to evaluate this relationship before you get too attached hun...

_____________________________

*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

(in reply to slaveluci)

Post #: 6

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:18:25 AM

Jez223

Posts: 13
Joined: 6/29/2007
Status: offline

TY a bunch for the info luci. However on the contrary, we do have lots to talk about, but having a one sided conversation via email seems a little difficult. Just talking about how my day was, whats going on in my life and whatnot, doesnt seem like it would cut it. He is a very gentle, open minded and beautiful person. I suppose he just wants to know I take the time to talk with him if he is not online. I dont think im going to break this relationship, I enjoy, and I know he enjoys it aswell. (And just to clear this, I am not new to being a sub, simply this relationship)

< Message edited by Jez223 -- 6/29/2007 7:19:08 AM >

(in reply to slaveluci)

Post #: 7

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:18:27 AM

desiresluv

Posts: 41
Joined: 6/13/2007
Status: offline

The most important thing is to take time...........with that being said....a week is not long enough to really know this Dom sweetie. If you are letting something like this emotionally devastate you...well......the road ahead looks dim. Take a good look at your relationship with him before going any further. After all...being so new in the relationship...anything and everything you email him about should interest him. Good luck...~desiresluv~

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)

Post #: 8

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:21:38 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

He isn't interested in you as a person. All he wants is wank fodder.

If he really gave a damn he would be a lot more interested in what the minutiae of your life was like, because the person who goes to work, cleans house, watches chick flicks is the real you. If he had any interest in ever meeting the real you, then he would be interested in these things.

But if you get off on knowing that some married man is jerking off to your retold old sexual exploits, go to it. Your choice as it is your choice to be "emotionally devastated" by someone you don't know anything about.

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)

Post #: 9

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:23:36 AM

greenearth21

Posts: 228
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

I suggest trying to talk about everything and anything. Whether it is kink, sexual ideas or just how your day went or even things you learned/experienced or realized about life. If this does not keep his interest then he may not be worth sticking with. In any relationship (besides an nsa), if you do not have common ground to speak on besides sex or how much he wants you to serve him or how much you want to serve him, there really isnt much of a relationship to begin with. I get the feeling that sometimes people want to express their sexual desires/wants or even devotion to 'the one' and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. But if you can hold a conversation or in your case email without mentioning sex and he's not interested, then its not worth having. Relationships are obviously more than that, and two people should be willing and show interest in sharing other parts of their partners' lives besides bedroom activities. Listen to your heart and if you are devastated over him not responding, ask yourself if it is worth the heartache. If there is any part of you that thinks its not, try to talk it out with him and if the results arent fruitful, get out. There is someone out there who will be interested in anything you say and take the time to appreciate and respond. Good luck and be true to yourself, regardless of what the status quo or expectations are. Only you have to full fill your expectations to yourself in order to be happy

(in reply to imthatacheyouhav)

Post #: 10

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:27:23 AM

BlindDescent

Posts: 113
Joined: 9/26/2006
Status: offline

I think this is one reason to establish a conversational relationship before the intense one. What is the foundation based upon? What do you do to fill the quiet moments inbetween the intense moments? Going for the 'gusto' too soon often leaves an emptiness or confusion once the intoxication clears. If I am going to spend time with someone (regardless of electronic or RT) I want to understand who they are in all views...not just the hot ones.
Good luck on your growth and learning Jez.

_____________________________

Reality is what you create; not what others leave behind.

(in reply to desiresluv)

Post #: 11

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:27:48 AM

Jez223

Posts: 13
Joined: 6/29/2007
Status: offline

TY all for the quick replies, many opinions I personally agree with, and a handfull I do not, nevertheless i appreciate those who provided me with helpful information. My hat goes off to yall.

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 12

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:41:42 AM

slaveish

Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline

Wooooooo. Goodness. Ok. ~pondering~

Baby, you're 18 years old. I know you are older now than you have ever been in your life, and it feels like you have the world by the tail, and it seems that you have all the answers to everything ...

... but take it from a woman who has been 18. And 21. And 31. And now 41.

A week is not long enough to know if someone is a beautiful person. He might be fun, he might say all the right things, and for all I know, he might actually be a beautiful person. But for someone to emotionally devastate you after a week, for someone to cease speaking to you for not sending an e-mail that ~he~ finds interesting, is missing a few blocks in the Lego castle of relationships.

Listen to women who have gone down this road before you. The path is paved with tears, clumps of hair, and broken hearts. Be smarter. Learn from us. Let us guide you, even when we aren't agreeing with you or saying something you want to hear. We have lived such things before and now we know better. There is a reason you can't spell "sage" without the "age" part.

Be well, Pumpkin. I know you will do what you will do, and you will believe what you want to believe, and you will probably do it the hard way (as most of us did). I will you a lifetime of strength and a universe of wisdom. And I hope you find joy, not sorrow, in the lessons.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 13

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:46:31 AM

Jez223

Posts: 13
Joined: 6/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveish

Wooooooo. Goodness. Ok. ~pondering~

Baby, you're 18 years old. I know you are older now than you have ever been in your life, and it feels like you have the world by the tail, and it seems that you have all the answers to everything ...

... but take it from a woman who has been 18. And 21. And 31. And now 41.

A week is not long enough to know if someone is a beautiful person. He might be fun, he might say all the right things, and for all I know, he might actually be a beautiful person. But for someone to emotionally devastate you after a week, for someone to cease speaking to you for not sending an e-mail that ~he~ finds interesting, is missing a few blocks in the Lego castle of relationships.

Listen to women who have gone down this road before you. The path is paved with tears, clumps of hair, and broken hearts. Be smarter. Learn from us. Let us guide you, even when we aren't agreeing with you or saying something you want to hear. We have lived such things before and now we know better. There is a reason you can't spell "sage" without the "age" part.

Be well, Pumpkin. I know you will do what you will do, and you will believe what you want to believe, and you will probably do it the hard way (as most of us did). I will you a lifetime of strength and a universe of wisdom. And I hope you find joy, not sorrow, in the lessons.

Heyo thats why im here, guidence and help. Obviously the majority see age as a huge factor in my understanding and interpretation of the situation im in, which is fine. However keep in mind im not just some 18year old who finds this lifestyle kinky and sexually gratifying(Be that true or not ). I am a bright and intelligent woman who is understanding and tolerant of other people and their own beliefs.

< Message edited by Jez223 -- 6/29/2007 7:48:12 AM >

(in reply to slaveish)

Post #: 14

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 7:55:39 AM

BBBTBW

Posts: 836
Joined: 5/21/2004
Status: offline

Well said Slaveish.

_____________________________

"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

(in reply to slaveish)

Post #: 15

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 8:21:56 AM

sublimelysensual

Posts: 298
Joined: 7/25/2005
Status: offline

Okay, without going into the whole..is he wonderful, is he awful, are there alarm bells going off deal, those have been addressed enough...it can be hard to know what to write about when you're doing so on a daily basis and talking as well. Feels like he already knows what's going on in your life, so why write about it?

When I run into this, what I often do is go research a topic that interests me/him/us, post the article in the mail *with credit given*, and then write about what I thought about it, what I hadn't considered, etc. Basically an emotional book report. Not re-summarizing, but writing about what it made me think about. Another thing to think about is asking him for a list of questions, can be about you, what you think of certain things, whatever..then you always have a supply of things to write about..Just my thoughts...

-a

_____________________________

"To make oneself an object, to make oneself passive, is a very different thing from being a passive object." -Simone De Beauvoir -'The Second Sex'

(in reply to BBBTBW)

Post #: 16

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 8:28:23 AM

slaveish

Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jez223

Heyo thats why im here, guidence and help. Obviously the majority see age as a huge factor in my understanding and interpretation of the situation im in, which is fine. However keep in mind im not just some 18year old who finds this lifestyle kinky and sexually gratifying(Be that true or not ). I am a bright and intelligent woman who is understanding and tolerant of other people and their own beliefs.

~chuckle~

I realize that, Sweetheart. I don't believe anyone is saying that you aren't intelligent or that you are taking this lightly. I cannot speak for everyone, but what ~ I ~ am saying is that you haven't had the life experience to make decisions that might be ... err ...

Ok. You haven't been kicked in the teeth enough yet. Unfortunately, you'll get there. We all do.

A one-week relationship, especially to me (a 40+ woman who has had her share of horrid "relationships") is nothing to become upset about. There is NO relationship. There is an exchange of fun information, probably some titillation, but there is no basis for a solid dynamic. He refuses to ~speak~ to you for not interesting him in some way?

If it were me, Dove, I'd say "My ASS." My opinion, of course, but you know what? There will be men who make you feel like shit while your life passes you by. You miss opportunities to do fun things, to do things that make a difference, to experience who ~you~ are. No one is worth that, and I don't care what kind of Grand Wizard Ultimate Supreme Master he is (or thinks he is).

The truth of the matter is that he is making you feel like less than the person you are, and doing it after only one week. Baby, listen to me. It's not worth it. Take it for what you will, and do what you will do. If he were a Master, he would make you feel more, add his energy to yours, not take your energy away.

Be well, girl. My goodness.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 17

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 8:48:59 AM

Jez223

Posts: 13
Joined: 6/29/2007
Status: offline

Thanks a bunch for that, really helped

(Im sorry if i've frustrated everyone *giggle*)

< Message edited by Jez223 -- 6/29/2007 8:53:43 AM >

(in reply to sublimelysensual)

Post #: 18

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 9:45:43 AM

slaverosebeauty

Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jez223
Been with my Master for about a week ( Still a young blood ) and every day when he gets home from work, he expects an interesting and exciting Email. If he does not get one, he will not talk to me (Emotionally devestating). Seeing i have to do one of these per day for him . . . im begining to run out of things to talk about that would interest him. Could anyone give me any suggestions to keep my Emails naughty, yet exciting ?

Welcome to the boards jez223.

You have been in an online relationship for a week?! WOW. I have done the daily email thing before, not so much sending masturbation material, but more what I did, where I went, etc; those relationships were based in r/t though, not o/l. Sounds like the guy wants something to jack off too. Personally, I found find that insutling that thats what he wants from you.

From my POV, online relationships 'end' when the computer goes off. jez223, find someone new who will be real and who likes and wants you for you, not for jackoff material.

MJ has been gone on vacation for just over a week an I am tareing up the walls; if He wanted a daily email, heck, I would do it at this point even if it was just erotica. We spoke last night on the phone and I was elated, we are ldr but based in r/t. He enjoys stories and that sorta thing on occassion, He may even ask me to write one for Him or find one I have written but He has not read, its not a daily thing. For us, that gives Him more insight into my fantasies, and it lets us talk about things that I may not have brought up before.

If that's why this person wanted daily emails to get to know you bette, thats one thing, yet, its does not sound like that at all.

_____________________________

http://slaverosebeauty.livejournal.com/

"Friends live on in our hearts, regardless if they are here or not."

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 19

RE: Online Relationship - Emails - 6/29/2007 9:49:36 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Have you considered the possibility that he is merely using you for his entertainment?

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Jez223)

Post #: 20

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