quote:

ORIGINAL: About2Hyde

Even though I’ve been active in the lifestyle for a decade now, I’m curious.  

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For an attractive, successful, and psychologically healthy woman, what’s the erotic appeal of Domination? (I’m excluding the plethora of “Dommes” out there whose profiles scream victim, issues with men, and/or self-esteem problems – which, let’s be honest, are not exactly dominant attributes.)  

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Why a naturally dominant personality might seek their complement, a naturally deferential one, is more understandable – but that’s something different.   My question is more TPE-related – what’s the long-term appeal in dominating an intelligent, successful, and very confident partner – and in time deepening that control?

quote:

ORIGINAL: About2Hyde

Even though I’ve been active in the lifestyle for a decade now, I’m curious.  

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For an attractive, successful, and psychologically healthy woman, what’s the erotic appeal of Domination? (I’m excluding the plethora of “Dommes” out there whose profiles scream victim, issues with men, and/or self-esteem problems – which, let’s be honest, are not exactly dominant attributes.) 

While there is an erotic appeal to it that is simply just one of many facets. The basis, however, is that it is simply who and what I am to begin with. It isn't a conscious choice I make. It isn't something I am capable of not being.

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Why a naturally dominant personality might seek their complement, a naturally deferential one, is more understandable – but that’s something different.   My question is more TPE-related – what’s the long-term appeal in dominating an intelligent, successful, and very confident partner – and in time deepening that control?

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
Ok, I'll bite. I consider myself an emotionally well-adjusted femdom type with a very normal lifestyle and career, but also am kinky-as-hell and live in a 24/7 "femdom" relationship, depending on your definition of the day.

I never had much interest in a man that would defer to me automatically because I am a woman or a femdom.  I also could not find myself attracted to men who were meek, lacked ambition or had low self esteem.  My successful relationship (6 yrs now) works because there's a ton of mutual respect and affection, yet we both know that I am in charge.  I still value his opinion greatly because I recognize that he has knowledge in many areas that I do not.  I liken being a good femdom partner in a relationship like being a good or fair boss; I know what I know and want, I have high expectations, but I value autonomony in my man and know when I need to use his intelligence or respect his opinions.

Sexually, it's an entirely different dynamic, where my needs are clearly always at the top of the list and I have a strong appetite for surrender, sacrifice and suffering that he gladly endures because his lust for me makes it fulfilling to see me over the moon for his plight. 

Akasha