seeking guidance

seeking guidance (Full Version)

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newMsubsksDomme -> seeking guidance (7/13/2007 1:54:49 AM)
playing the role of slave or sub has intrigued enough to join this site. I have never acted upon any of the feelings but would like to know more about the difference between sub and slave. I also need some help with basic interactions in the rooms since i am unfamiliar with typical protocol. thank you in advance

LadyHeart -> RE: seeking guidance (7/13/2007 2:10:12 AM)
There is an excellent Search function at the top of the page. I am not being rude or facetious - if you are new, it's the best way to get a "feel" for the site. Happy hunting! :)) LH

blmtrsne -> RE: seeking guidance (7/13/2007 2:35:03 AM)
You seem to be new to the lifestyle as well: you have feelings and say you think about playing. Just an advice: you might want to decide wether it's just playing you want or a situation for life 24/7. That does not mean you need to get married, but in that case you might want to please your future domina by getting to know females, train in householdtasks etc. In my opinion the best slave is not one that cries hard when whipped, but one who frees up time so I can do interesting things. And take a look at www.slaveregister.com for some info on ownership, markings etc. If you decide on which way to follow, I can give you a few reading-hints. Don't expect more.

SunNMoon -> RE: seeking guidance (7/13/2007 6:48:03 AM)
I agree with Lady Heart use the search to look up anything, you’ll get a feeling plus learn about the different sides to the issue. Also just spend sometime reading the boards that should help. You also need to think about if this is only for play which could be considered a version of bedroom kink or if you want this to be a larger part of your life. Also think about are you just interested in the playing a role of a submissive or actually being submissive? Both are fine and you need to be clear about it. Plus read around on the web it gives lots of information and not all the sites are good but still you get many different perspectives on different issues. Lastly, remember it will be your relationship so look for one that fits your needs and some of your wants. And look at the person not as a role but as a person.

ocilla -> RE: seeking guidance (7/13/2007 8:03:11 AM)
Check out little sarbonn's post on what a sub has to offer a Domme. This approach has been widely approved by the many here who have read it. I have advised someone that I play with who is working through identifying where they fall on the slave - sub - bottom - bedroom kink continuum to search and read up on postings from male subs on here who are experienced and generally well thought of and well written. There are quite a few wonderful representatives who post here but the ones that pop into mind are: politesub, little sarbonn, chia the pet, underground sea, pixelslave, adrian, stockingsluver, and cloudboy has added some stuff recently.... These guys are all very different, very much unique individuals so you will get different veiws reading their posts. Just a warning - I am not at all sure I got their names spelled correctly. And also note that there are female subs too that are great to learn from - aproaching a Domme versus a Dom does seem to be different though.

thetammyjo -> RE: seeking guidance (7/13/2007 8:06:31 AM)
My best advice to you, mewMsubasksDomme is the same that I'd give anyone new. Don't classify yourself as sub or slave now. Think more of yourself as a bottom and get some experiences, all types of experiences. Honestly how can you realistically classify yourself beyond top or bottom (or even switch) until you have experiences to look back on and evaluate? Life is a journey that does not end, maybe even not when we think it does (at death). BDSM is just one part of life (in my strong opinion) so you are on that part of the journey. Do a lot of reading, sure, fantasize, great, but get some experience out there in meatlife. Find a munch or a group and start going. Listen, observe, then ask questions, volunteer, offer your opinions. In a few years (yes, I did indeed say years) you can then start to further classify yourself and your BDSM interests if you wish to. Fact is, you don't have to further classify yourself. All of these labels are merely shorthand to get hopefully deeper conversations and connections started.

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