Moth to the flame

Moth to the flame (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive

Message

notbad2day -> Moth to the flame (7/13/2007 5:24:47 PM)
How is it that we are drawn to the lifestyle? I don't find myself particularly submissive in the vanilla world, but for some reason am drawn to the bottom when thinking about the lifestyle. I mean I'm even willing to rewrite my profile in an attempt to satisfy a dominant female who feels I'm...confused. Go figure. Any comments or words of advice fellow grunts?

Politesub53 -> RE: Moth to the flame (7/13/2007 5:33:55 PM)
Don`t rewrite your proflie for anyone but you. i spent ages to figure out why i was submissive than decided to hell with it...... i just am. Good luck and welcome to the boards. [;)]

mstrjx -> RE: Moth to the flame (7/13/2007 5:34:05 PM)
My interests go back to childhood. Started with bondage. That seemed like it was my entry-point into the Lifestyle (although there was this one woman I now know as submissive that I dated a few years before I understood 'the package'). But once I started seeing all of the facets of 'what we do', I figured out I could pick and choose amongst the things that seemed interesting to me, and expound on them. I always tell people that who/what you are now (at LEAST interest-wise, if not in general), is not the same person you'll be 6 months down the road, and certainly a year along. This assumes that your real-time interactions are consistent and regular. That isn't always how it is for people, but that's certainly best-case. Jeff

MasterNdorei -> RE: Moth to the flame (7/13/2007 9:59:38 PM)
i rewrite our profile on a semi regular basis. If what is written is not bringing the results you want, maybe you should consider this too. If the woman suggesting something to you has a good idea, it is no reason to kick yourself. You did not make a radical change that is permanent or life altering. It's a profile! There are many people with powerful, demanding jobs and lives who prefer to submit in a lifestyle relationship. There are many reasons, but not the least of them being that they need a break, they need to let go. i know a few Dommes whose "dance cards" are full of highly successful professional men for just this reason. Everyone joins and experiences the lifestyle for different reasons. Relax and enjoy the ride. It's not supposed to stress you out. Be Well~* Master's dorei

BitaTruble -> RE: Moth to the flame (7/13/2007 10:01:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: notbad2day How is it that we are drawn to the lifestyle? I don't find myself particularly submissive in the vanilla world, but for some reason am drawn to the bottom when thinking about the lifestyle. I mean I'm even willing to rewrite my profile in an attempt to satisfy a dominant female who feels I'm...confused. Go figure. Any comments or words of advice fellow grunts? Personally, I like your profile. If you want to rewrite it or are going to rewrite for 'your' Mistress, that's one thing, but to do a rewrite for some random Internet stranger, eh, why bother? You'll never be able to please all the random Internet strangers you meet, so, please yourself, be yourself and the one who likes you for who you really are will be along when the time is ripe. Good luck and welcome to the boards. Celeste

notbad2day -> RE: Moth to the flame (7/13/2007 11:01:19 PM)
Master's dorei...I do tend to have a demanding job and although some may see it as powerful I do not. It is wrought with compromise and frustration. I suspect my personal life is also interwoven within this psyche. However, I am here to serve and may someday realize that fantasy. I reach out for Her. Thank you for your comment.

MasterNdorei -> RE: Moth to the flame (7/13/2007 11:06:39 PM)
Hang in there. :) It sometimes takes a while to find a good fit, but the good people on these boards will keep you company. Master's dorei

MastersMaiden -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/15/2007 2:44:21 PM)
i agree, you definately cant please everyone :) i guess i've always been drawn to the lifestyle as a submissive...i never really knew what that meant until about 2 years ago though. it was cemented what i WASNT when my ex wanted me to roleplaying, like"those dominatrix chicks" lol. That was when i DEFINATELY knew i wasnt a switch or a domme. i did try though, lol. it was always just a feeling of something missing in my life, i would always try and get my ex to me more dominant, and take charge of things, and he just wasnt that way. Then i met my Master :), who explained things to me, and helped me to understand what i was feeling. i'm still wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy noobie though lol. a little of the current topic, but relevent to the OP, i think :D

BoundDragon -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/15/2007 2:58:30 PM)
I have always been this way... I may have only put a name to it in the later years but the same feelings and stimuli have always been there.... I am as nature intended me & embrace my tendancies to the utmost.

IvyMorgan -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/15/2007 3:02:28 PM)
That's a question I'm never going to have an answer to, and at the same time, know exactly why. I'm like this because I was trained/molded to be this way. But whether I would have been like this without the training, whether this was already inside me before then, I won't know. Trying a dose of "accept self as is" is working for me though. I am who I am, and how I got here is almost irrelevent.

becca333 -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/16/2007 7:48:25 AM)
I'm like this because... I am. Nobody made me this way, no trauma or training or whatever. Life made me this way, I suppose, but I've always felt this yearning, before I even knew the name for it. Don't rewrite your profile, you can't change how you are. Enjoy it, and find someone who values you for you.

johnnyak -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/16/2007 7:15:40 PM)
notbad2day just reading your post is like a mirror reflection of what i thought about writing.Im also in the same boat.In the vanilla world im far from submissive but the lifestyle is just so much of a lure and something that,as of yet,not sure as to whether to feel guilty about my submissive urges towards Women,whether it makes me feel like less or a man or whether to embrace it.Im one confused young man at the moment![:@]

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/16/2007 7:20:53 PM)
My boys just feel its right to be submissive. Angel tends to be that way with most females, Kitten was that way with just me. For some its how you deal with personal iteraction, for others there is just someone you cannot help but give yourself to. You ARE confused... give it time. But d not rewrite yourself to make others happy. Find someone to grow with. Its a rough journey, bt OH so worth it in the end DV

littleone35 -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/17/2007 7:47:13 AM)
I was born submissive even as a child. It was not until i met my late mentor that i could put a name to my feelings that was 7 almost 8 years ago and i fought it then but now i am fine and happy about it. Matt's littleone

Constanza -> RE: Moth to the flame (8/17/2007 2:17:33 PM)
Since i have a Master and i am not looking for another one, i keep my information on my profile to a minimum. If people want to know more about me, they are free to ask him about me or check my signature.

notbad2day -> RE: Moth to the flame (9/1/2007 4:54:45 PM)
Although submissive I do not find myself in a hurry to be a slave. I desire more to offer myself to a Domina for a sense of worthiness or as a way to see that another values me. Odd huh? I have value...why do I seek it from someone who wishes to dominate others?

kossack -> RE: Moth to the flame (9/1/2007 5:16:57 PM)
I knew I was interested in erotic submission even while I still thought sex was 'icky.' Like you, I'm not at all submissive in the rest of my life--just the opposite, actually. But, somehow I feel more secure, more protected, more alive when I relinquish all that responsiblity and let someone else drive. I can't describe it well, it is like trying to describe a candle light when you only have a florescent to exam it with, but it is just part of who I am.

Babybass -> RE: Moth to the flame (9/1/2007 5:57:26 PM)
In vanilla life and in business I am not submissive - but I have always known that I have the tendancy to be submissive - it is my natural state. I have found only one man that i can give myslf to completely - mind, body and soul. If any other man were to say what he says or ask what he asks of me I would laugh at them or backanswer - but I am his completely and always will be. If this relationship were to ever end would i look for another master - in time probably yes - but he would have very big shoes to fill!!

iammachine -> RE: Moth to the flame (9/1/2007 8:31:06 PM)
I, for one, actually like your profile. It's brief, but well written. I, for one, re-write my own semi-regularly, but I do so for myself though I do tend to take some sort of feedback when I do to better tailor what I'm wanting to say. So, I guess, input good, but that's an influence, not a deciding factor. As for how I was drawn to the lifestlye, I guess I've always had something of a kinky inclination. One of my favorite toys as a little girl was a pair of trick hand cuffs. [:D]

RaynaSub -> RE: Moth to the flame (9/1/2007 9:05:01 PM)
I am in this lifestyle, because this is who I am. I don't really feel like I have a choice.

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.03125