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Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 3:11:47 AM   
mitda


Posts: 26
Joined: 6/17/2007
Status: offline 		i'm going to a munch for the very first time tonight and i would love to know your experiences with these-- are they as informal as i've been lead to believe?  do we wear our collars (we wear them every where else, though, so why shouldn't we?)  this one is being held at a bakery/cafe kind of restaurant, so i'm thinking it will be very chill (as opposed to those held at someone's house, right? right?)
can you tell i've got nerves about the whole thing?
thanks in advance.
mitda (with emelina next to me)

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 3:33:59 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		My experience is that they are informal.  Sure, wear your collars but, since it's in a public place...unless the group has rented out the entire place, dress somewhat conservatively.  I mean, don't wear anything too "fetish-y."  No reason to be nervous.  Relax and have fun.

Oh yeah...no smoking...it's bad for your health :)

(in reply to mitda)
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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 3:52:00 AM   
mitda


Posts: 26
Joined: 6/17/2007
Status: offline 		: ) having fun is easy.

especially if you're being bad to your health. 
-mitda

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 3:55:00 AM   
Emelina


Posts: 5
Joined: 6/21/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks, mitda and i will leave the leather bustiers and pvc pants at home. :)

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 5:15:50 AM   
Littlepita


Posts: 1430
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline 		The ones I have been too have been very relaxed with fun and friendly people. Like Bandit said stay clear of the fetish wear since it's a public location. Have a good time!

_____________________________

“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” – Anais Nin

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 5:22:21 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Yanno?  If everyone listened to bandit, the world would be a much better place!

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 6:04:30 AM   
BRNaughtyAngel


Posts: 1821
Status: offline 		I can only speak for our local group, but the munches are held in various local restaurants.  They reserve one of the private rooms, but no one wears fetish wear as it's still a public place.  As to your collar, I would guess that would be up to you and your owner, but for me, as long as it wasn't something "extreme", then just wear it like you normally would with your regular street clothes.

The munches are a nice way to meet others who are interested in the lifestyle and are probably not much different than any other club meeting.  I do know some folks here have posted before that they didn't care for the munches in their areas because the people's behaviors were too extreme for a public venue.

Have fun!

(in reply to mitda)
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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 8:37:40 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Your worst fear should be about being bored or repulsed.

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 8:40:36 AM   
winterlight


Posts: 1319
Joined: 2/18/2006
Status: offline 		There are two munches i go to. They are both at restaurants. One is held in an outside, back patio. The other at a family restaurant in their back room.
Its the biggest room in the place. I go in regular clothes, no fetish wear. I have yet to see a sub show up in a leather collar and i have been going to these for over 3 years.
There is no play there as this is a public place.

relax, be yourself and enjoy!

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 11:17:23 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Munch is generally just a bunch of people sitting around eating dinner together.  Lots of smokers.  There will be enough cues to tell they are kinky if you know what to look for, but generally it's just chit chat.

Some groups are better than others in personality, openness.  There will be some mix of people there just to chill/doms there to try and look impressive/subs there to try and look attractive- hopefully the mix will be right for you.

There's a munch group around Austin which I generally like the people involved, but I'm the youngest one there by at least 5 years AND don't have much in common with them.  This is something that rarely happens to me, or at least hasn't happened regularly for quite awhile, so I find it hard to enjoy and likely won't be going very often.  But the group itself is still nice enough and the right temperature for a lot of people.

But really, just a lot of people sitting around eating dinner.  You really shouldn't see anything other than some drink fillings and discreet hair pullings when it comes to expressions of orientation.

And don't worry- we all survived!

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1028367/mpage_1/key_munch/tm.htm#1028597
munchies

http://www.collarchat.com/m_976040/mpage_1/key_munch/tm.htm#976047
Advice on attending your first munch?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_833058/mpage_1/key_first%252Cmunch/tm.htm#833180
Munches

http://www.collarchat.com/m_438399/mpage_1/key_munch/tm.htm#438658
Advice on a first munch

http://www.collarchat.com/m_133075/mpage_1/key_munch/tm.htm#133214
munches

http://www.collarchat.com/m_123477/mpage_1/key_munch/tm.htm#123520
munches and sloshes

http://www.collarchat.com/m_120380/mpage_1/key_munch/tm.htm#120646
first munch...

http://www.collarchat.com/m_264730/mpage_1/key_munches/tm.htm#264747
normal reaction?

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 2:50:57 PM   
kossack


Posts: 82
Joined: 8/5/2006
Status: offline 		Have fun and be yourself!  I've had some really great conversations and met some neat people.  The only thing I would say is be aware that there are vanilla people there and there are sometimes some kinksters who don't behave how I would prefer people behave in a vanilla, public, setting.  I pretty much quit going to munches after a couple of times where this twit came in loudly, into a public restaurant with a lot of families, and started talking very loudly about kink!  I was just too embarassed, not just about the kink (although I'm very hidden in my daily life) but also about the lack of manners. 

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 3:04:01 PM   
xolarkinxo


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/10/2005
Status: offline 		The munch I went to was in a small resturant that had been rented for the event.  There was a good mix of ages. Some nice people and some stand-offish.  The food was okay (pizza and salad).  I was slightly bored; there was a huge dissertation about the group's rules and fees; but, then we played BDSM bingo.  I won some pretty jewelry and Tacs won a paddle (the thing stings like hell).  I was nervous prior to going because that's how I am preceding any event I'm about to attend in which I don't know anybody there.  And, also the safety issue I have regarding certain cities. Mitda, have fun there or make your own; go outside and smoke.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 8:15:04 PM   
MasterofDrkness


Posts: 32
Joined: 6/27/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with whats been posted here...it`s in a public place.. act and dress accordingly , be your self and enjoy the chats... be nice to the waitress`s  or waiters.. they always have this devilish smile as to say they know.. but are not going to ask   lol.. my advice .. just sit back and listen for awhile to feel things out .. the ones I have been to, people are always friendly  and interesting.


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Now he thinks he's a fire engine.
It's okay until he pisses on your lighter.

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 9:34:25 PM   
Trampler


Posts: 580
Joined: 12/31/2006
Status: offline 		All of the munches I have been to have been fairly informal. I see some peasant blouses, and occasionally a ren fair-ish outfit, (nothing fancy, mostly peasant wear.) and I have seen people wear collars, but they look like fashionable.  And plus quite a few people would rather have hide-in-plain-site jewelry.

When going to a new munch, see if you can talk to the hosts/whomever is in charge before hand, to ask about any rules, as not all munches are informal.

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 11:07:04 PM   
mitda


Posts: 26
Joined: 6/17/2007
Status: offline 		we survived indeed.  emelina and i wore our collars, because that's just what we do, anyway, and we're pretty obvious, but that's probably what we do too. 
thank you to everyone who chimed in with warm "it will be ok" remarks.  it was;  i took a few smoke breaks and drank too much coffee, stayed most of the night even though it was like a zillion degrees in the room in which we congregated.
we met a few people, turned a few heads, had a yum delish dinner and made some plans for the future.

thanks to the Lucky Albatross for the warm greeting : )

mitda
and emelina across the bed from me.

(in reply to xolarkinxo)
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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/14/2007 11:56:12 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		*salutes* No prob, and really I think my friend and I maybe made a bit of a spectacle with our strawberry feeding fun before you arrived as well so I wouldn't worry too much.  And you didn't see Leo & Kat show up this time- then you'll see what "obvious" means to GWNN.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/15/2007 11:50:37 AM   
Saint


Posts: 279
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Your worst fear should be about being bored or repulsed.


Been there, done that, currently experiencing it with all the Mid-Michigan and beyond munches that I attend unfortunately. My advice mitda is to severly limit how often you attend. If you go more than once or perhaps twice per month then you really do run the risk of becoming bored, jaded and repulsed. Keep your attendance to a minimum and you should avoid that fate for a few years yet.

_____________________________

"Anonymity is synonymous with longevity."
Faethor Ferenczy

"I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel tonight"
Nightwish - Wish I had an Angel Tonight

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RE: Munch munch munch? - 7/15/2007 12:15:00 PM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline 		A Munch is just a social gathering of people with a common interest.  Regardless of what that interest is, whether it's BDSM, Linux programming or stamp collecting, how much fun you have in that social group is entirely dependent on the personalities involved.  Some social groups have more assholes and bullies who play power games and think they know everything there is to know about the subjct.  Some social groups have more intelligent and pleasant people who are happy to share what they know and learn from others.  So it's a pretty wide spectrum. 

I've only ever run into one Munch group that I was disgusted enough to walk out on.  It was in Central Florida, and a particularly assholish, bigoted, homophobic, know-it-all, nonconsensual-power-game-playing male dominant was in the habit of running his mouth very offensively.  Unfortunately he also ran the Munch and owned the only decent local play space, so he got away with those remarks without being challenged by anyone but me.  I walked out and refused to have anything more to do with a group where nobody had the balls to tell a bigoted asshole that he was a bigoted asshole just because he had toys they wanted to play with.

That was the single and only negative experience I've ever had at a Munch, and I've attended a ridiculous number of them. The rest have ranged from having a mildly amusing social evening to really enjoying the intelligent conversation and generally friendly energy of fun people.

(in reply to Saint)
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