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Perverts of the world unite! - 6/22/2005 9:55:26 PM   
Croctden


Posts: 8
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline 		You know I’ve noticed an inordinate number of people ranting about people with other views on BDSM. Those who only submit in the bedroom blast full time slaves and vice versa. Those who insist on intense serious relationships frown on those who are casual or polysexual. Extreme Doms get ripped by other Doms. Switches seem to be especially popular targets. I can’t tell you how many times I have heard someone say you can’t be a “real” dominant if you also submit. Did I miss a meeting? Is there a rulebook somewhere? I bet being spanked by a switch feels pretty similar.

This level of intolerance annoys me to no end. With most of the vanilla world pooh-poohing our lifestyle and a sizable percentage of them wanting us arrested or thinking we need psychological help, to mock others for liking a different variety of this wide world we call BDSM kills me. Many could do to remember that no matter what you like, most people like something else. I would like to think that encountering bigotry would make those in the lifestyle less inclined to lash out in fear and anger at those they disagree with or don’t understand.
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 4:09:01 AM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I would like to think that encountering bigotry would make those in the lifestyle less inclined to lash out in fear and anger at those they disagree with or don’t understand.


You would think so, wouldn't you?

Jewel

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to Croctden)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 4:30:47 AM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

This level of intolerance annoys me to no end.


Me too. But I also know that the hardest thing to do is change people's behaviours and opinions. So I won't even attempt it. All I can do is raise awareness with posts that are open an accepting.

As far as getting frustrated over it, I've been there. I'm sure I'll go there again. But most usually, I simply try to respond to the narrow minded with an alternative of open mindedness with a courteous enough tone—unless they've completely pissed me off of course—that perhaps, just maybe, but I wouldn’t bank my life on it, I can be an agent of change.

Welcome to the boards and realise there are many, many tolerant people here.

- LA


< Message edited by LadyAngelika -- 6/23/2005 4:31:23 AM >

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to Croctden)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 5:45:50 AM   
Jasmyn


Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
Status: offline 		Oh common live in the real world ... finding the 'bdsm community' of acceptance isn't some holy grail of what is right or what is wrong or some indifferent authority as to what should be. In fact I'd say more people have been 'burnt' by this 'notion' of community than encouraged or helped by it. People have redefined bdsm, ds, fetish, whatever to suit themselves. Suddenly it's fashionable to be open minded enough to accept the concept of tie me up and whip me, or fondling latex behind closed doors but to not take on the responsibility of it.

_____________________________

quote:

"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.


Visit My Website


(in reply to LadyAngelika)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 5:48:48 AM   
Jasmyn


Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
Status: offline 		Sorry Lady Angelika, that was in response to Croctden not yourself.

Jasmyn

_____________________________

quote:

"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.


Visit My Website


(in reply to Jasmyn)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 5:58:15 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		One of the first things people need to learn when they get into bdsm is that we really are JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.

Which means the same intolerances and issues that everyone else has.

(in reply to Croctden)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 6:46:42 AM   
Kiaban


Posts: 124
Joined: 7/11/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

One of the first things people need to learn when they get into bdsm is that we really are JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.

Which means the same intolerances and issues that everyone else has.


Two things I can't stand...Intolerant people and those who's kinks differ from mine!

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 6:53:44 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kiaban

Two things I can't stand...Intolerant people and those who's kinks differ from mine!


I can't stand the word "subbie" or obvious grammatical errors

"Whose," the possessive form of the word.

"Who's," the contraction of "who is."

(in reply to Kiaban)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 10:26:40 AM   
Croctden


Posts: 8
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline 		Gee, thanks for the lecture. I'm not saying I expect us to all hold hands and sing kumbaya. I recognize human nature is to denigrate anyone who seems different no matter how similar they really are (this is why blacks flip out when gays say marriage is a civil rights issue - oh no say the blacks we didn't choose to be black, but you CHOSE to be gay). I don't consider myself part of a community, but the self-righteousness of some is sickening.

(in reply to Jasmyn)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 10:31:15 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I don't consider myself part of a community, but the self-righteousness of some is sickening.


What makes you think it is self-righteousness? Perhaps it is sheer ignorance.
Everything in life that makes us whom we are today is learned behavior. Even
if we learned that at the age of 38. We gravitate our thinking to whatever the thinking was of the person who first taught us.
We can't expect everyone to know everything...we'd live in a perfect world if that were the case.
Everyone also wants to think what they are doing is the absolute best. They boast about it...making you think they are putting other's down.

Of course there are those out there who like to put other's down. There are no absolutes in any lifestyle let alone our's.

Vanilla life is not fair, you can't expect this life to be any better.

(in reply to Croctden)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 10:48:21 AM   
CalliopePurple


Posts: 2539
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
Status: offline 		No matter what subcommunity you're a part of, there will always be people who think that their way of doing it is the only "right" way. Some gays and lesbians don't like bisexuals, some eclectic pagans don't like Wiccans...the list goes on and on.

You can either complain about it or be an example of tolerance for others to watch and learn from.

_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

(in reply to sub4hire)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 12:30:30 PM   
ProScatman


Posts: 167
Joined: 5/28/2004
From: Ohio
Status: offline
quote:

Gee, thanks for the lecture.


Actually, you asked for feedback! All these people have given you their honest opinion of your post.

_____________________________

The objection to Puritans is not that they try to make us think as they do, but that they try to make us do as they think.

Have a good day, Mike

(in reply to Croctden)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 12:36:35 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Oh common live in the real world ...


I'm assuming you were responding to the OP and not me...

*edited because I just saw your correction - man I wish there was a delete my own post button*

- LA

< Message edited by LadyAngelika -- 6/23/2005 12:37:24 PM >

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to Jasmyn)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/23/2005 12:45:10 PM   
BeachMystress


Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Croctden
Gee, thanks for the lecture.


Anyone who disagrees with you is lecturing? Anyone who points out their feelings is lecturing? No wonder you're so annoyed with the rest of us in the BDSM world. I think if you're going to preach tolerance, you need to practice it at home. This brings up another "problem" in BDSM and the world in general- hypocrisy.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to Croctden)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/24/2005 6:53:04 AM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 3149
Status: offline
quote:

Two things I can't stand...Intolerant people and those who's kinks differ from mine!


well MY kink is better then yours... hee hee
MY kink is at the top of the food chain, and yours at the bottom..

na na na na na

(in reply to Kiaban)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/24/2005 7:37:49 AM   
Kiaban


Posts: 124
Joined: 7/11/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kiaban

Two things I can't stand...Intolerant people and those who's kinks differ from mine!


I can't stand the word "subbie" or obvious grammatical errors

"Whose," the possessive form of the word.

"Who's," the contraction of "who is."

Grammer doesn't apply if its a joke. *wink* and if you are going to grab a red pen everytime I make a grammatical mistake you are going to run out of ink fast!

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/24/2005 7:41:09 AM   
Kiaban


Posts: 124
Joined: 7/11/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl

quote:

Two things I can't stand...Intolerant people and those who's kinks differ from mine!


well MY kink is better then yours... hee hee
MY kink is at the top of the food chain, and yours at the bottom..

na na na na na

young jedi..or jeditress? your kink is to close to mine to be better we are slowly pulling you to the dark side of the force. muhahahah

(in reply to RiotGirl)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/24/2005 8:41:23 AM   
Domin81


Posts: 66
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline 		Human nature always amazes me…. things like how fast the oppressed can become the oppressors and how fast yesterday’s newbie becomes today’s authority.

_____________________________

El Gordo
http://www.bound2please.com
Quality Toys & Restraints Made in Canada

(in reply to Kiaban)
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RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/24/2005 9:26:22 AM   
MsIncognito


Posts: 742
Joined: 5/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire

What makes you think it is self-righteousness? Perhaps it is sheer ignorance.



From what I have observed people who do this are afraid and/or insecure. This holds true for all people, not just kinky people. It's a human thing, not a kinky thing.

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Perverts of the world unite! - 6/25/2005 8:59:30 AM   
Croctden


Posts: 8
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BeachMystress

quote:

ORIGINAL: Croctden
Gee, thanks for the lecture.


Anyone who disagrees with you is lecturing? Anyone who points out their feelings is lecturing? No wonder you're so annoyed with the rest of us in the BDSM world. I think if you're going to preach tolerance, you need to practice it at home. This brings up another "problem" in BDSM and the world in general- hypocrisy.


I was not complaining about the fact I was disagreed with, but that I was told to "live in the real world."

(in reply to BeachMystress)
Profile   Post #: 20
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