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fadedlace -> RE: I Need Advice: Relationship Type (7/19/2007 11:34:16 PM)
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I've always just asked what I wanted to know from ones I was seeing...if they were lying, somewhere along the line they tripped themselves up and they couldn't fast-talk their way around confessing the truth or some semblance of it. I've never "spied" such as having them followed, and am not sure I could even ask anyone to do that. I still recommend asking, and hope the answer is not clearly meant to blow my concerns off as unimportant.
I'm pretty quick to dismiss people now who aren't forthcoming when asked direct questions (I used to be less firm and more patient), or when it's clear they want me to devote my time or energy to them while offering virtually none of theirs. I'm probably too quick to dismiss them (a friend told me I'm intimidating at times), but frankly, I don't want the drama. I'd rather start with honesty, and then if we click, Wow.
On a side note to the OP, only one man has been invited into my home before I knew him very well *I learned a painful lesson to not do that after that one time - I had to take two days off work, and it took a long while for all the visible deep bruising around my throat and collarbone to go away, getting a lot of questioning looks from coworkers.* - by "knew very well," I mean full name, address, phone number(s), license plate numbers and car description. Place of employment if he wished to give that. I've also required a lot of dates/outings in public beforehand. There is another person here depending on my continued life, and I won't ever be too trusting with my safety again. Please be cautious and know who it is who gains entry to your home...he may be a great guy who highly values his privacy (benefit of the doubt here) but...you don't really know for sure at this point.
*edited to correct a misspelling...I know I'm tired now...[8|]*
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