failed the "submissive" test again! (Full Version)

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fillepink -> failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 7:40:54 PM)

heard from a Man tonite and went to YIM, where, in defiance of my profile, He insisted on asking me specific questions about what sexual pratices i would do. my answer is : "i think i'd like light bondage and role playing, and will try my best to please my Dom, if i ever have one."

well He asked if i would do watersports; bathroom (wtf is THAT?); 3ways; humiliation and orgasm denial. i said "no, no, no, and probably yes (since i'm not entirely sure what orgasm denial is)." He told me i was not a submissive and left.

This has happened to me before..esp the part about 3ways (which i always assume is 2 girls and a guy). i just wanted to say f**k it; i am submissive; just straight and not experienced..and have no desire to be peed on or humiliated. sometimes i think i'd get more respect if i said i wanted to f**k horses, LOL. fillepink

[image]local://upfiles/72910/A46770F8D6204135A54468888A6B5916.jpg[/image]



quietkitten -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 7:44:38 PM)

I think it's hilarious when people say that... when what they REALLY should say is "you are not my type of submissive". It would be so much easier if they could just understand everyone is different.
You know who and what you are.



sub4hire -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 7:47:13 PM)

quote:

well He asked if i would do watersports; bathroom (wtf is THAT?); 3ways; humiliation and orgasm denial. i said "no, no, no, and probably yes (since i'm not entirely sure what orgasm denial is)." He told me i was not a submissive and left.


Watersports is pee.
So what if you aren't submissive, does it matter? He isn't dominant, does it matter? The two of you aren't the right fit for one another.
A real dom has patience...he or she would'nt expect you to just comply without discussion.
Who knows, your limits may become his in time...as you get more educated and experienced.
This guy will never know. His loss...all the longer it will take him to find anyone.



Raphael -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 7:58:09 PM)

You know, if you were telling a man you called Master you would never do any of these things, regardless of his desires, I might see some sense to the accusation.

Not that I would necessarily agree with it, but at least I could see some sense to it.




Kinkypupper -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 8:11:21 PM)

YOU did not fail anything... "HE" failed the "decency" test and that labels him as a horney wannabe.
I am guessing that you want more then that.. well stick to it.. There are "real" people here you just have to weed threw the crap.

A person like that you describe has no "class" nor any clue what he is probably talking about..

Those a girl is ALWAYS better off to avoid.



perfection20005 -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 8:16:41 PM)

I wouldn't worry about what anyone said unless you call Him Master. Who cares what some unknown person thinks??
There is no test to fail.

perfection



Isolde -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 8:22:49 PM)

You know, I've noticed a lot that declaring limits seems to be a red flag for some people. It seems sometimes that a person can't have hard or soft limits without there being some doubt as to whether or not they're a "true" submissive. That's ridiculous. Why can't she have limits she's comfortable with? Why is it assumed that someone should be willing to cast these limits gleefully aside the instant they have a master?

I expect most dominants will work with a submissive to push their limits back in a way that is safe and comfortable for both of them. But to condemn someone for having limits at all? That seems unfair and judgemental to me. Where's the sense in it?



kisshou -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 9:08:12 PM)

fillepink,

I would think it would hurt if you took the time to log into messenger to chat with someone who seemed interesting only to have them then be rude and mean.
I hope you are just venting a little bit here and those not nice people are not getting you down on yourself.
I think anyone who has read your replies to posts could see what a great friend you would make. (you give great advice)
I have seen some other threads on mentors, maybe an online Mentor or experienced sub could help you.
Courage is its own reward so try not to get discouraged.

I was wondering are you going to munches in your area?





Mylee -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 9:33:16 PM)

filliepink,

Only you truely know if your heart wants to submit, your limits are your own, just because a lass feels the need or want or longing to submit doesn't mean that she doesn't have the right to set her own limits for what she's willing to do, that makes you no less submissive in your heart then a lass who will have wider limits, and who's to say that you wont explore new and more limits with someone you TRUST your submissive nature to, there is no need to rush yourself and your Master will get a good feel for how far he can push you and how quickly as well

Take heart, you know your soul, and your longings, let this roll off you if you can, I've found threre are some very carring Dominates here, who wont cross lines you arnt willing to and who will even talk through messages going in knowing that nothing but chat will take place

best wishes
my'lee



mistoferin -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 10:06:56 PM)

quote:

heard from a Man tonite and went to YIM, where, in defiance of my profile, He insisted on asking me specific questions about what sexual pratices i would do. my answer is : "i think i'd like light bondage and role playing, and will try my best to please my Dom, if i ever have one."


If your profile clearly states that you will not engage in this type of discussion, and this is ignored and questions are asked, I would reference the line in your profile that states it and explain that is something that you will not discuss until such time that YOU feel comfortable enough with that person to do so. If that line of questioning persists, I would simply end the conversation at that point as it would be clear that they do not respect you. Personally, my sexual practices are not open for discussion to every "Dom" looking to solve his morning wood dilemma.



BlkTallFullfig -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 11:12:41 PM)

Hey it's only fair... I've failed Domme test on several occasions for 1)not being a loud screaming bitch, 2)not wanting to chat about sex with random online strangers, 3)not demanding they relocate and start forking over their money immediately; these all came from bullshitting liars of course, but once in a while you have to go hmmmm, WTF???? M



Lordandmaster -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/26/2005 11:15:18 PM)

The guy sounds like a jackass--but, you know, if we had a thread about every jackass in the world, we'd run out of bandwidth.



cellogrrlMK -> RE: failed the "submissive" test again! (6/27/2005 6:09:50 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Raphael

You know, if you were telling a man you called Master you would never do any of these things, regardless of his desires, I might see some sense to the accusation.

Not that I would necessarily agree with it, but at least I could see some sense to it.




I don't believe she ever called this wanker "Master", she was just talking to him.

And I've told my Master that I would not do watersports... tried it, didn't like it one bit, and it is a hard limit for me. If that makes me less of a submissive in some people's eyes, well, too bad! [:)]



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