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In Search of Mentor - 6/28/2005 4:37:00 AM

mselisetoyou

Posts: 9
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

I have recently become engaged to a male sub. He's sweet and very experienced. He loves waterplay, face sitting, ass worship forced feminization, and has told me he will do anything. He also lovingly does tasks for me around the house. Our sex is mixed with FD/s elements as well as vanilla aspects. I prefer this combined modality. He is eager, I think, to have me begin training him as My submissive but I am uncertain about how to go about doing this. He is not eager, however, to show me how to go about this. Which, is appropriate.

We are currently living in two cities. I would like to become a protege for an experienced Domme. Also, I would be willing to pay for mentoring services. Any recommendations?

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RE: In Search of Mentor - 6/28/2005 5:08:30 AM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline

Firstly, do not offer to pay for this type of service... you open yourself up to a feeding frenzy of people that would only be capable of taking your funds & not offering you any valid instruction in return.

As to training you to be Domme... well you need to discover this within yourself. It is not just some skill that can be picked up. It is more about your mindset & soul if you will. Topping on the other hand can be a learned activity.

Best suggestion, start finding a peer group that you can talk with. You will find that talking with others, gaining insight from many different points of view will help you to get a much better understanding.

Please feel free to contact me directly. I would never claim to be a mentor, I would rather say that I have been a 'sounding board' to a great deal of people.

MstrssPassion

(in reply to mselisetoyou)

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RE: In Search of Mentor - 6/28/2005 5:13:19 AM

LadyAngelika

Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline

Bonjour MsElise :)

First welcome to collarme & collarchat. It's nice to see another Montreal Domme here. I'm sure the Dommes on this thread will respond with great advice on how to go about this.

If you are a looking for real time exposure, Jade Dragon (collarme handle MistressJadeMTL) has recently started the Montreal FemDomme Society "whose mission it is to encourage the psychological growth and education of Montreal-area FemDommes through activities such as personal discussions, hands-on seminars, workshops, and High Mistress Teas."

You can message either her or I for more info. This group is relatively new for now but I'm sure it will grow quite quickly. You will more then likely find more then one potential mentor there :)

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to mselisetoyou)

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RE: In Search of Mentor - 6/28/2005 3:34:37 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
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Welcome, it is so heartening to see that to make this work in your relationship! Good Luck!

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SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to LadyAngelika)

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RE: In Search of Mentor - 6/29/2005 7:39:01 AM

Oumae

Posts: 911
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline

I'm not a huge fan of having a mentor, the thought of just one person doesnt work for me....If needed I like to bounce things of a few people and get different views and see what from them suits me.

If there is a FemDomme group near you that sounds like a good place to go.

Good luck with it. :-)

Oumae

_____________________________

Is cuma le fear na mbrog ca leagann se a chos.
( The man with the boots does not mind where he places his foot)

(in reply to mselisetoyou)

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RE: In Search of Mentor - 6/29/2005 12:06:51 PM

noumenon

Posts: 28
Joined: 6/24/2005
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I have a feeling you'll be ok, just be careful when choosing to select a mentor. Accepting a teacher is a huge step in life, especially when they are going to be teaching you how to.. basically.. be you. Make absolutely sure you can't do it on your own before you find a mentor. I don't necessarily think teachers are a bad thing, but other than safety percautions I have a hard time figuring out what people really need to be taught. It should mostly come natural, i'd say. I would reference a butterfly in the wild... it seems to be struggling to get out of it's cocoon at first. But if you help it, it will never be strong enough to use it's wings and eventually die. I wouldn't want to see a similar effect in your relationship.

Just to make myself clear, I am not saying a mentor is a bad thing. They aren't. I have had many mentors in other aspects of my life, just not D/s. There are many nifty ideas and tips you can pick up from others who are more experienced than yourself. Just be weary when you allow someone to tell you how you should be expressing yourself. Make sure you agree with everything the teacher is saying, don't do something just because that's what you feel obligated to do as a Domme. In the end, I wish you the best and hope you're all happy no matter what decision you make.

(in reply to Oumae)

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