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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 11:52:09 AM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeira

Ownedgirlie,

Would you say the conversation between your Master and yourself flowed fairly well before the “tell me about yourself” question on the phone?

charmdpetKeira,

Sorry it has taken me so long to reply. I have been away for a few days.

It depends what you mean by "flowed fairly well." Our first conversation was something of an argument. In our second conversation I was extremely guarded and not very forthcoming. I think it was after the third or fourth IM exchange that we spoke on the phone. All exchanges had felt fairly strained to me, because of my fears. Yet I felt pulled to him, and couldn't help but continue.

So when he said on the phone to tell him about myself, I stuttered and said "um" a lot, and it was painfully awkward for me. I asked what it was that he wanted to know. I wanted him to make it easy for me to answer. But he said "Whatever you want to tell me...whatever you think I should know about you."

Hmm, so he has basically never made it easy for me!! Purposefully so!

But to answer your question, no, our conversations did not flow fairly well prior to him asking that question. But I can see that this was his way of getting to know me, beyond what words I chose to share. Whatever I did with his question painted a picture for him of my self esteem, my self confidence, my comfortability with being open, where my doors were and how tightly they were sealed...all sorts of things. It showed him how guarded I was (or how open I was), and how creative I was (or wasn't).

I have had fun with that question - "I was born in a log cabin on an old dirt road...." and joked around. I have been serious as hell about that question. I have been closed off to the question. I have been totally open to the question. Each approach represents my state of mind and shines a light on the overall picture of who I am.

So I say clever is the person who asks it open ended. He/she may very well know exactly what he/she is doing...

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 6:48:56 PM

charmdpetKeira

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Thank you all, I appreciate the perspective and Ownedgirlie, for comming back.

k

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 6:55:53 PM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
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I tend to do the "So tell me more about yourself" after haing spoken to someone for a bit. Never as a first email.
However, seeing what someone decides to tell me does give me a good idea of what they find important. I can always fill in the blanks later.

If someone asks me, they get the general rundown. My age, height, eye and hair color... about what youd find out face to face the first time you walked up to me.
BEyond that, you need to aks for specifics.

DV

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 6:57:51 PM

michaelOfGeorgia

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i start by saying: "try reading my profile first, then get back to me...if you're still interested"

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 7:01:03 PM

charlotte12

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I generally respond with "what would you like to know?"

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 7:03:33 PM

sophia37

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It sounds like one of those phone interviews people sometimes endure when looking for a new job. Fun! The guy sounds like an employer more than a real person. "tell me your best qualities you possess as a woman" "Whats is the most important thing you did in your career as a sub and why?" lol

Listen, if its a job with carreer potential and the money is great, then go for it. If its just a guy looking for some sex, I say skip the rest of the interview. lololololol

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 7:26:36 PM

prpackaged

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Joined: 11/10/2005
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quote:

I received an e-mail containing the, often, though not always, self declaration of intelligence, good looks, etc; which realistically tells me nothing, other then the person thinks highly of themselves, with a request of “If you care to get to know one another, let me know by telling me more about yourself.”

quote:

ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeir

I find this topic quite interesting. If left to a meeting without any introduction, it is quite a challenge to know what to say. Most males tend to strut in order to gainattention. I would prefer to exchange information about myself (see profile) and whomever I may contact (see their profile) . What I would like to know is what a submissive might like in that first contact. Obviously, CharmdpetKeira prefers something other than the struting. What approach works on that first date. Pickup lines are also not so good. Personally, I like the approach that my uncle talks about. Being a farmboy he often looks at the ladies as those who should be paying for the stud services.
So I know that the struting might not work.
I would still like to know what might help to initiate that first contact.

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Post #: 27

RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 8:17:38 PM

charmdpetKeira

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quote:

Obviously, CharmdpetKeira prefers something other than the struting.

Here’s the thing; I find that those who have something to “strut” about, generally don’t need to. So when someone does, I start to wonder what they are hiding, or better yet; who are they trying to convince, me or them.

Perhaps, it comes from being around too many who are “self declarers”, that are unable to put their money where their mouth is.

quote:

Personally, I like the approach that my uncle talks about. Being a farmboy he often looks at the ladies as those who should be paying for the stud services.

If they are all flocking to you, I guess it might work; but seriously, the first guy that walks up to me saying, “I want to screw you, but you will have to pay me” will only be laughed at hysterically; God help em if I’ve been drinking. ;)

k

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/4/2007 10:33:29 PM

skittles47

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I usually answer with the informative answer of read my journals. That will tell you about me and how I think and feel. Then if you still have questions please feel free to ask them. This shows courtesy and respect without all the redundant writing for nothing. If he is truly interested he will be reading the journal entries already or will begin to read them. If you hear from him again great if not, well not a great deal of energy thrown away.
skittles

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/6/2007 3:22:48 PM

elsie

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I recieved an e-mail just recently with one line to it "do you like whipping?" My response was something to the effect "That question is addressed in a few areas of my profile" and left it simply at that .... needless to say I haven't heard from him again.

I also don't really respond to much to those who just quote me their profile info, I can read that if I'm really interested after their first contact with me. For the most part one-liners get a "thank you", "exCUSE me?" or whatever what I catagorize an appropriate response at the time.

I *prefer* a dom telling me about himself and what he can offer to one asking me what I have to offer him in a first mailing ...

just my nickles worth,
elsie

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/6/2007 3:40:02 PM

shyinini

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Once again, I personally LIKE this approach. Like so many questions I ask, not here but every where, open ended questions of curiosity or open ended questions of ..you fill in the blanks please, do have a certain characteristic in themselves in that the one asking is not precluding the responder from something specifc .. .. is not leading the conversation or the questions to what they want to hear. Rather, it allows the responder to take the continued conversation in any direction they choose to take it in.

Sir's girl

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/6/2007 5:33:10 PM

habibi

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*fast reply*

nothing makes me run for the delete button faster than when i do make the effort to answer a vague email and get something just as vague back. and asking things like "tell me about you" or "tell me about what you believe about <insert nonspecific topic here> .....i have no desire to write a book to someone who's putting forth no effort. who i know nothing about and who i probably in the end, couldn't care less about. i find these types of emails usually come from those with terribly vague and/or sparse profiles. *said realizing my profile is rather vague and sparse* it's not that i'm not willing to expound upon my beliefs and my wants and needs....i just don't want to feel like it's a one way street and i'm at an interview. i think it's important to get a sense of the actual person as much as it is to get a sense of their inner beliefs. and i think the basics should come first.

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RE: How would you respond? - 8/6/2007 7:40:58 PM

celticlord2112

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx

Hmmm, the ol' "tell me about yourself" thing. My usual response:
"i am 47, ex-wife, mother of 2 bio and 2 strays, all extremities are intact, have all my own hair and teeth which i brush regularly and respectively, can read write and speak english, i don't drive drunk, i don't throw wet towels on the floor and i change my underwear every day if i wear any at all."
It usually gets a chuckle and a better worded email after that. If not, so be it.

LOL...cute answer. As a Dom who is frequently guilty of such horrid one-liners, personally I'd love a response such as yours...it gets the conversation going (starting a conversation is my perennial weakness).

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Post #: 33