AAkasha
Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tabithaaz
I actually have served a Mistress for about 4 months last year. i am not serving Her anymore due to at the time i was having some personal and work issues that i need to work out. W/we are still friends though. Our relationship was purely a D/s relationship, but i found i was looking for more. W/we talked about it. i was looking for more in a relationship than just D/s.
As for vanilla, i date, but have yet to find anything serious (dating sucks btw!). i constantly go back and forth between a regular vanilla relationship and a purely D/s relationship. i just feel empty a bit on both sides, and am trying to find balance.
Mistress told me that i have a slaves heart and when a woman finds me, she will be lucky because i will treat like a queen
A lot of people have pointed out some things that you should look at regarding your expectations. But to the point of having a relationship, being a husband, and being a slave -- you can do them all, together, but you have to realize that it's probably not going to be the 24/7 fantasy you desire. You limit your potential pool of partners if you set your expectations so high, and in reality, after living that for 6 months or a year you might realize it's a bit over the top as well.
Subs seem to often list their "ideal Mistress" as what they seek -- and don't mind if they set their standards exceptionally high. When you state that you want long periods of chastity and feminization, you are alienating femdoms that might have a "light" interested in forced femme and perhaps not really understand why chastity would be interesting. But, she might have a host of other femdom interests.
I know a lot more femdoms that are into/enjoy/accept some regular feminization, but not as many that would want a full time feminized slave. Remember, some women do want a man, as well. You add in the chastity and essentially you are almost eliminating any woman who has a sex drive and lust for anything masculine. Perhaps a fantasy ideal for you is that you are kept as a lesbian sex slave -- your manhood is removed (caged) and you are to behave as a woman completely with your Mistress. Is that a realistic relationship goal? I'd say no -- at least, you're looking for a needle in a haystack.
Is that a realistic *weekend* romp with a Mistress, while the rest of the relationship has you acting as a man? Sure. How about a few times a week? As for chastity, you have to realize she might like intercourse. So if she's interested in sporadic chastity for teasing and denial, what about that?
I suppose the point I'm making is that the more extreme, the more frequent, the more idealistic the expectations are the less likely you are to meet eligible partners. If you change your ideals and instead look for a woman you connect with, who shares some of the same kinks, you'll find that once chemistry kicks in, both of you will be remarkably open to compromise. Perhaps she'd get into the idea of extremely regular feminization of you; perhaps you'd realize the chastity part wasn't as big of a deal.
Akasha
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