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camisra -> Found my perfect Mistress (8/4/2007 8:03:21 AM)
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Well i met my new Mistress on the 20-07-07, this was after several weeks of communication between messages through CM, chatting online and lengthy calls. The nerves finally subsided, and after dinner on the first evening, Mistress dropped the bombshell that as of the following day i was to wear skirts and no panties however with the latter i had until the Sunday for that one.
i sat and listened and when i retired for the evening i pondered over what had been said and realised that Mistress was right that there was no harm to myself. The following morning showered and got dressed in a skirt and chose no undies, mind you it took me a good 5 minutes to have the courage to come out of the bedroom.
i found in the time i was with Mistress she always gave me a choice,challenged me continuously and still does to do a regular self analysis on my previous conditioning and thought pattern. i write in my journal and have been doing so since W/we first met, which i am finding a rather useful habit to get into.
When the day came for me to leave Mistress placed an entry into my journal stated five specific instructions for me to follow and a gift of her consideration.
I returned home and unfortunatly within less than 48hrs i would have broken 3 out of 5 of the rules i was to follow. After discussions with Mistress, one of the main rules was to have breakfast daily for health reasons as i noticed a big change while i was there that it worked. So after all of that i improved and got 4 out of 5 rules right, however, yesterday the digest version i blatantly disobeyed Mistress on one of the rules. She let me know in no uncertain terms that she was not happy, i accepted the punishment to fit the crime.
Mistress believes in other methods for punishment rather than spankings or floggings. The way i felt inside last night knowing i had dissapointed and displeased her was more painful for me than any flogging i could have ever recieved.
The reason why i personally hurt so much was Mistress has uncondiotionally requested that i return to her at the end of this month after major surgery for her to help in my recovery and to make sure i return to do things at the correct pace instead of me thinking " oh i feel good today, and going about it like a bull in a china shop" and suffering for it later.
Thanks to Mistress suggesting i remember how much joy and beauty i find in giving, she then got me to question myself as to how or why i would deny someone else that joyful experience. Because of that i finally agreed that i must learn this valuable lesson not to be to stubborn or proud to admit i need help and to openly accept it where and when it is offered without arguemnts.
If Mistress You by some chance come accross this thread, i openly thank You for guiding me on the correct pathway, helping me combat fears, and being there as i experience many firsts along the way.[:)]
camisra
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