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Help settling in - 8/16/2007 9:12:10 AM   
johnnyak


Posts: 64
Joined: 7/30/2007
Status: offline 		Im finding it near impossible to make friends on this site.  Would anyone have any words of wisdom or advice to help me get settled into this site!? I messaged some Dommes and subs to talk and make friends,learn from them etc but never seem to get replies and i do send a picture too...hmm..maybe im not a looker like i thought! Anyways any help/advice would be appreciated!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 9:15:55 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		well, do they show up on your viewing me button ever?  It may be that you want to put up a nice picture of yourself, and tell a little bit about who you are in your profile, other than new.  Do you read? play chess? fix things? like to dine out?

that kinda thing, not ANYTHING about how much you want to lick ass or be a dick wiggler or get the shit kicked out of you........

What do you do for the other 23.75 hours of the day?

sounds rude I know, but you ain't got much to work with there.

Ron 

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to johnnyak)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 9:16:51 AM   
biracalsub4wmDom


Posts: 109
Joined: 7/26/2007
From: Illinois
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: johnnyak

Im finding it near impossible to make friends on this site.  Would anyone have any words of wisdom or advice to help me get settled into this site!? I messaged some Dommes and subs to talk and make friends,learn from them etc but never seem to get replies and i do send a picture too...hmm..maybe im not a looker like i thought! Anyways any help/advice would be appreciated!


I don't have any advice for you as to how to make friends.  But hey....I can always use another friend.  :)  So now you've got one  (no picture required for that).....



_____________________________

blessings...

biracialsub

***Please respect that I am OWNED & not seeking a Master. Thank You***




(in reply to johnnyak)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 9:36:58 AM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		Look johnny, there is one sure fire way to make friends on this site. Stay on the forums and off the personals section. At least on this side, you know that people will write something to you. Even if it is to say your an ass.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to johnnyak)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 10:01:27 AM   
servantheart


Posts: 960
Joined: 10/26/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

Look johnny, there is one sure fire way to make friends on this site. Stay on the forums and off the personals section. At least on this side, you know that people will write something to you. Even if it is to say your an ass.


LOL...this is true. 
 
Personally, though I've been contacted on the personals section by some major morons, I've also made some really good friends.  I also met my Master there nearly a year ago, even though I wasn't looking for Him at the time . 
 
 

_____________________________

When you really trust someone, you have to be okay with not understanding some things.
~Real Live Preacher, Real Live Preacher weblog, 07-08-04; Anonymous author of RealLivePreacher.com

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 11:29:29 AM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Go to munches and workshops. Participate in the forums.

Don't just send emails saying hello. Ask questions. I've had email exchanges based on photos people have put up of scenery asking what the picture was of, how often he/she went there on vacation, etc. I've also written people on the side to ask in detail about something sensitive they shared in a forum post, I include some of my own reasons for asking.

(in reply to servantheart)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 11:57:01 AM   
servantheart


Posts: 960
Joined: 10/26/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

Go to munches and workshops. Participate in the forums.

Don't just send emails saying hello. Ask questions. I've had email exchanges based on photos people have put up of scenery asking what the picture was of, how often he/she went there on vacation, etc. I've also written people on the side to ask in detail about something sensitive they shared in a forum post, I include some of my own reasons for asking.


YES!!  Nothing is more annoying than getting an email that says "Hi", from someone you don't know.  Once, I got an email from someone that simply said "thank you" and I'm sitting there thinking wtf?!  Also, always pay close attention to what is written in someone's profile if you're going to email them.  It never ceases to amaze me how disrespectful some can be when emailing complete strangers.  Sometimes I have to really stifle the urge to send a smartass response to some of the things I find in my in box

_____________________________

When you really trust someone, you have to be okay with not understanding some things.
~Real Live Preacher, Real Live Preacher weblog, 07-08-04; Anonymous author of RealLivePreacher.com

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 12:10:12 PM   
MsBearlee


Posts: 1032
Joined: 2/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: johnnyak

Im finding it near impossible to make friends on this site.  Would anyone have any words of wisdom or advice to help me get settled into this site!? ...Anyways any help/advice would be appreciated!  


quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

well, do they show up on your viewing me button ever?  It may be that you want to put up a nice picture of yourself, and tell a little bit about who you are in your profile, other than new.  Do you read? play chess? fix things? like to dine out?

that kinda thing, not ANYTHING about how much you want to lick ass or be a dick wiggler or get the shit kicked out of you........

What do you do for the other 23.75 hours of the day?

sounds rude I know, but you ain't got much to work with there. 


Yes, What  Ron said; that 'Who's Viewing Me' button is a good thing (sorta).  At least it's one place to start.  You could begin with 'I noticed you viewed my profile, thank you...'
 
Having said that...I find one of the best places to 'get to know' people is right here on the boards.  Participate!  Try to stay open-minded and polite...and you'll come to call many people here 'friends'.
 
I would also agree with Ron about the profile, though.  Not much to go on, there.  What is it you want and hope to find; exactly?  Real-time or Online only?  Do you feel you're a 'lifestyler'......or a kinky guy who plays at BDSM?  And yes, what ELSE do you do?  Can you travel?  How far is too far?  Personally, I like to see all that sorta stuff in a profile. 
 
Perhaps reading other profiles would help you fill yours out a little better.
 
Just my thoughts...
B

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A must read for submissives! (click here)

This one, as well!

(in reply to johnnyak)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 12:46:39 PM   
BoundDragon


Posts: 265
Joined: 3/20/2007
Status: offline 		I have to agree with the general advise on here... as you can see my post count is low (so far) but I already have had a few people message me and have had really nice positive conversations with me via private messages. To those of you that have... Thnk you it is greatly appreciated.

And yes... a personal response showing interest in something I have said or something in my profile does go a long way (rather than "Do you want to meet someone who can really dominate you"... not even a flamin hello!!!!)
This works two ways....
*you try and contact someone using this eticate (sorry about the spelling... I'm certain its wrong) and they are more inclined to spend time talking to you
*they contact you using the same then you know they arent wasting your time as well & they are (more often than not) genuine.

I hope you find some good friends on here... trust me, they are out there. Feel free to say hi whenever you like.

< Message edited by BoundDragon -- 8/16/2007 12:59:13 PM >

(in reply to MsBearlee)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 12:53:16 PM   
Enlightenedespot


Posts: 43
Joined: 7/25/2007
Status: offline 		Are you serious? This is a great group of people. You might start with getting to know the person rather going right to the heavy stuff

_____________________________

You'd think differently about pollen if you thought of it as tree sperm

(in reply to BoundDragon)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 1:37:51 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		It takes a bit of time for friendships to happen on here. Best thing is to read the posts, respond to the ones which interest you and reply intelligently. In time, you'll find that people will take notice of what you have to say and will want to develop a friendship outside CM also.
   When I first joined I didn't know a soul here., now there are several who I have developed friendships with and chat regularly with offsite and onsite!

_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to johnnyak)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 1:50:15 PM   
leatherpet32


Posts: 27
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline
That is why i started coming here too. Meeting "REAL" people here, since as a few have said, at least you know the people here write more then just "i want you to lick my ass" or some other fun e-mail. Here people get to hear what you have to say, express your opnions on a variety of topics and who knows, maybe one will catch someone's eye and you'll begin that wonderful new relationship into freindship. All i know is that i have been reading posts here and i've already come to really love a few specific ppls point of view, sense of humour, etc, etc. That's why the message forum is great, you get to know about ppl more then those annoying pm's.

Ya'll have a good one

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 1:57:05 PM   
realtuffdom


Posts: 108
Joined: 7/16/2007
Status: offline 		Not everyone can be as wonderful as I am and have the greatest profile that ever existed that causes women to come "flocking" to my arms, so I understand the dilemma. What I would suggest is actually continuing posting, talking to people on the message boards and start to observe what works for others. Granted, what works for me won't work for anyone else because I'm just that wonderful, but all of those others that post can prove to be good examples.

_____________________________

Always, Ram Ford Tough....

I have lots and lots of experience at domination. Now I'd just like to try it with a partner....

(in reply to leatherpet32)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 2:03:35 PM   
leatherpet32


Posts: 27
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline
  *flocks to realtuffdom's arrms after reading that soo wonderful amazing can't gert over it profile*

Ohhhh ahem excuse me You said women, damn wonderful and greatest proiles anyways, i'm so weak! *hangs head in shame*

(in reply to realtuffdom)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 2:15:31 PM   
lateralist1


Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline 		Perhaps instructing Dommes to write to you is not the best idea in the world.

(in reply to realtuffdom)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 2:22:20 PM   
realtuffdom


Posts: 108
Joined: 7/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

Perhaps instructing Dommes to write to you is not the best idea in the world.



Who? Me? Or is that a fast reply to the original poster?

_____________________________

Always, Ram Ford Tough....

I have lots and lots of experience at domination. Now I'd just like to try it with a partner....

(in reply to lateralist1)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 3:03:25 PM   
twistedkytten


Posts: 240
Joined: 9/8/2006
Status: offline 		I try to thank people for taking the time to view my profile ... or in reading others, if something strikes me...or interests me i send a note.

(in reply to realtuffdom)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 5:43:23 PM   
Twicehappy2x


Posts: 1096
Joined: 3/27/2007
Status: offline 		Try posting a bit, joining in on some of the fun posts, go visit Hotel Collarme or pop in on the cruise. 

_____________________________

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to johnnyak)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 5:56:04 PM   
johnnyak


Posts: 64
Joined: 7/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

Perhaps instructing Dommes to write to you is not the best idea in the world.



Im guessing that was aimed at me! I never instructed Dommes to write me or subs for that matter.I may be young but im still mature and intelligent enough to approach people in PM's in the right manner(I think!) Like sending a message saying "I want you to beat the shit outta me" is obviously a no no! Im just at the stage where i recently discovered im submissive towards women so im sort of in a rush to get to know Dommes and subs because i feel pretty isolated and confused at the moment with my whole "oh shit theres something wrong with me im a submissive"  thing going on! The posts so far are great a few in particular stuck out for me.MrDiscipline that "stay away from the personals and start posting " thing makes alot of sense..And hey BoundDragon...Hi!

(in reply to lateralist1)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Help settling in - 8/16/2007 6:03:19 PM   
johnnyak


Posts: 64
Joined: 7/30/2007
Status: offline 		Oh i had one Domme reply to me earlier today.She asked me was i man enough to take a good caning and spanking.What type of message is that?! It was as if She did'nt even read my message and just sent a random msg like that to me.I think that has cemented what your all telling me..stay away from the personals for now! Last thing a newbie sub like me wants to hear is "I'll beat the shit outta you,dya think you can take it" ...I think you'll agree!

(in reply to johnnyak)
Profile   Post #: 20
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