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A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/20/2007 3:50:47 PM

fieryangel21

Posts: 40
Joined: 8/17/2007
Status: offline

I am not particularly dissatisfied with the number of responses I am getting with my CollarMe profile. (I find it a blessing that I haven't encountered many creeps or time-wasters.) But I was wondering today what all the subs out there really look for in a Domme's profile.

For me, when I am searching, you can't go wrong with lots of information, as long as it is relevent and coherent. Short and sweet can be intriguing, but lots of people write too little in my opinion. I am definitely turned off if someone's profile says "Fuck me please" or something ridiculous like that.

I also wonder how much it matters if someone has a photo. I have had different experiences with this on other sites. Typically, once I post a photo, I get more responses. I suppose people want to know I'm real and not hideous before responding. However, I also had someone accuse me of being a fake because I posted a photo that did not show a clear view of my face and someone swore I stole the pic because they someone else on the site had photos of "the same person" wearing "the same shirt." (On a side note, this particularly irked me because the guy initiated contact with me and continued to contact me even though I was clear in my disinterest, since I am only seeking females. He acted like him ceasing contact with me was some big loss... what a putz.) So now I'm afraid posting a photo might hurt me more than help me. I am certainly not a fake and don't want to have that reputation.

So, basically... What kind of profile do you think is the most successful? That is, what kinds of profile descriptions and pictures really make you want to respond? I'm not asking about people's personal preferences, but rather what kinds of things really catch your eye or impress you when viewing a profile of someone who is already compatible with the basics of what you are looking for? What strategy makes you want to get to know them better as a friend? as a Domme?

I appreciate your thoughtful answers. :-)

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I always find myself wondering when signing on to the public computers on campus, "Do you really care about my personal settings, or are you just programmed to say that?"

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/22/2007 12:40:57 PM

Constanza

Posts: 57
Joined: 8/15/2007
Status: offline

Profiles are a reflexion of the people behind it. How it is writen or what kind of picture is on it, tells you a lot.

For me, well i have a Master so i don't look for anything in a profile, i look to the profiles who are looking at mine though.

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Collared by Lord Sully on Saturday august 25th 2007, The man i adore and love.

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/22/2007 1:54:59 PM

YesMistressIrish

Posts: 1135
Joined: 5/1/2007
From: Calif
Status: offline

Fiery angel21,

Would you like a dommes opinion on this? If so, I'd love to answer you.

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/22/2007 3:37:48 PM

MissyRane

Posts: 1032
Joined: 5/11/2005
Status: offline

I think a simple, down to earth well written profile does it for me, short...but tells alot about you..not too much bullshit
I don't think pictures do the whole difference, but they can e.g. if you're just looking through profilepictures and find some appealing you might stop and read over the profile. I think pictures do kind of matter here 'cause otherwise you can't read profiles without going to the detailed profile and then your name pops up in the who's viewing me section(which I've no interest in) therefore I only end up on profiles with pics. Pictures that are just..like you are, no setups or what but ones that show the typical you, I think all these dressed up n professionally taken pics get old and uninteresting.
On the other hand if I were able to end up not only on profile pics when running through profiles I'd definitely take time to read those that are easy to read (not difficult colors like white on blue background) well spoken and are to the point.

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/23/2007 5:38:41 PM

Mystique567

Posts: 273
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline

I would actually like a Domme response

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/24/2007 1:46:09 AM

thirtyone

Posts: 3
Joined: 8/24/2007
Status: offline

I have a master and am not actively looking but sometimes I fantasise about submitting to a woman and sometimes read dommes profiles.

I do like to see a pic but its not vital, I like a profile that is honest and to the point. What you like and what would be in store for your sub. But not in a threatening way. I like it when a dom(me) says they see submission as a gift, something precious. Yes I want to be owned but I want to be a prized possesion.

For a new relationship too comments like respects limits are reassuring .

If I ever contact anyone I like to hear back even if just a polite no thanks.

HTH

31 x

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/25/2007 9:04:17 AM

tobetreasured

Posts: 4
Joined: 3/6/2006
Status: offline

Nice question. I look for profiles that show the Domme understands that the lifestyle for them is not about domineering, but of one's ability and desire to control themselves and another. I like to see a sense of humor in their profile. I do like a pic because though looks are not my top concern, having some attraction is important. I do not post my pic due to my work situation, but I agree, when I have posted my pic, I get messages constantly. I'm attractive, and sadly, that seems to be why I get their message, not because they've read my profile and find some interest in who I am.

I just love the men writing and not getting the fact that I'm a lesbian and though can enjoy conversation with men, I have absolutely zero interest in anything more than friendship. I do respond to all messages that show an interest and are at least polite.

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/28/2007 10:18:34 PM

YesMistressIrish

Posts: 1135
Joined: 5/1/2007
From: Calif
Status: offline

My ideal profile:
Sense of humor, clear and concise, articulate, no spelling errors.
Not too short, not too verbose.
I do like a shorter profile and recent journal entries about the things the sub does in life. 'Went to a munch, had some fun, and I think I made a few new friends.' Or: 'Still haven't been to any public play clubs and do not think I ever want to.' Or, 'Finally finished up my ____ training and am ready to start my new job next week.'
One of the things that happens a lot when searching for a female sub: Many female sub profiles are covers for a couple where the Dominant half is hunting for others to play with. When I see "I am single, not a couple looking for play partners,' I am very encouraged.
Also, fresh pics, not too revealing, and sad to say, not too perfect looking either. It is pretty easy to snap up a pic off of another site, and many scammers do this. So, if you really are very attractive, put up a less slightly less attractive pic, then send a better one once we start connecting through emails.
If you have age comfort limits, please state what they are.
Since any relationship will include vanilla interests I like to see a few boundaries. ie: 'Personal hard limits: allergic to cats, smokers, drug users, and arrogant bastards. lol'
Or: 'I smoke, so if you don't, be ok with it, or pass me by.'

I like to see if someone has a job, and also real life bdsm experience or not.
If they smoke, drug, public play or not.

That help?

MI

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/28/2007 11:58:29 PM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

what catches my eye in general? to be honest...a picture...a casual face picture obviously taken by you or someone you know...nothing staged, not a work picture...either at home or on vacation outdoors...
then a well thought out, insite into you, not a laundry list of wants or dislikes profile with correct grammar and spelling (word processing programs are a miracle, though as you can see i don't include capitalization and punctuation in my particular obsession lol)...your profile is pretty good...it intrigues me...i would send you an email, actually strongly considered it, to discuss some things you mentioned in the the body of it, but you hate conservative politics and country music so...

but anyway...if you have an issue with posting a face pic...one angle that usually appeals to me, personally, is a glancing over the shoulder, almost profile...or a very in the shadows type pic...one that comes to mind is Faramir's pic...but i would do it closer up with the eyes highlighted...
good luck....
chelle

edited after checking a thesaurus...dang those college english classes...i am forever self editing...

< Message edited by chellekitty -- 8/29/2007 12:00:55 AM >

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/29/2007 12:26:20 AM

venusdiva429

Posts: 44
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

Grammar and spelling are key. If someone's words look ignorant, that's a huge turnoff. I like to hear about normal things that they like, because too much I'M! SUPA! MASTA! seems like a bit too much trying. Pics are key. To me, I like to see a face. I like it to be obvious. If you're doing this, be honest with your game. I understand that some are too scared of being outed or something, but it makes me suspicious, nonetheless.

Journal entries are nice, too. I like to see that they care about keeping people up to date.

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/29/2007 3:24:06 AM

CandyLover

Posts: 68
Joined: 6/5/2007
Status: offline

I guess I look for weird things in profiles... I never randomly browse profiles, I only look at them in response to a message/viewing. I like to look at their join date, and if they're "fresh" (less than a week), I usually just pass it over as a spam-account. If the join date is from a few years ago and they've got a profile that looks like they spent less than a minute on it, I pass it over, too. Pictures are nice, because I'd hate to be in a relationship with someone who looks far better than me (it would just make me feel depressed, really). As for the written content, I really enjoy seeing some mention of non-BDSM activities in there since it makes their profiles feel "real" compared to a wank-list profile.

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RE: A question for female subs seeking Dommes - 8/29/2007 4:28:26 AM

callistaIn

Posts: 62
Status: offline

Personally, I could care less if there is a photo listed or not. What stops me when I am reading a profile is how much intelligence, humor, and day to day activities the person has listed. I could care less how much xp they have, or how long they have been in the 'lifestyle'. I would rather know what kind of person they are, what they like, dislike, what their favorite food, color is, etc...little things like that. The rest will fall into place in time.

Of course, this is only my preferences when looking at profiles ( both men and women ); I know that others would/will go about it differently.

callie

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