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Petty torments - 8/26/2007 12:53:54 AM

Aimtoplease101

Posts: 319
Joined: 2/8/2006
From: San Diego, California
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I recently watched Silence of the Lambs again, in one scene of which Hannibal remarks about the "petty torments" to which his jailer subjects him. It reminded me of a comment that Smythe made on this board once about how when she went out with her boy to a restaurant, she would order him the most unappetizing thing on the menu {Smythe-- not calling you petty here-- just linking up the thoughts[;)}. I've heard of other Dommes making their subs walk around with beebees (sp?) in their shoes, drive while sitting on a softball, or pour hot sauce all over their meals, etc. These torments are usually non-sexual in nature, and more control driven than anything else.

Do you engage in any little torment games with your subs, "just because you can?" If so, what are they?

Regards, ATP

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RE: Petty torments - 8/26/2007 7:36:03 AM

Smythe

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Come east, young man, and I will show you "petty" !! Oh but really, no offense taken.
Smythe

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RE: Petty torments - 8/26/2007 4:00:45 PM

justLady

Posts: 26
Joined: 6/21/2006
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No.

My boy goes out of his way to make sure my life is as happy, serene and joyful as he can make it. I try to extend him the same love, courtesy and respect.

I do exert control - but as often as possible, it's to aid a mutually beneficial conclusion.

Just our particular dynamic - no disrespect to those who enjoy a different vibe.

On a lighter note, he's just so goddamned good and cute, it can be hard enough to summon my inner sadist during a scene, nevermind outside it.

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RE: Petty torments - 8/26/2007 6:25:20 PM

homedespot

Posts: 79
Joined: 5/28/2006
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My slave and I have discussed this at legenth. The difference between being a bully and exerting My dominance for My pleasure. He knows that if I order him to kiss My feet in Starbucks he must do that...but to do it only to do it is petty or bullying IN MY WORLD. If I have to ask him to get Me sugar in My Starbucks and he stares at Me blankly and says "get your own damn sugar" then making him kneel to Me in Starbucks is exerting My dominance for a reason. (I'm not suggesting subjecting vanilla people to My life I'm using an extreme example)

We both enjoy the little things I can do to show My control over him but many of the things you listed seem like punishment to Me and not dominance. I will often make him wear something small like a cock ring or a ribbon or string for the day. Not painful but a small reminder. I order for him in a restaurant but not things he hates to eat. I limit the number of beers he can have because I don't like beery men etc.

Being petty (or as I call it, bullying) isn't the dynamic of our relationship.

J

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RE: Petty torments - 8/29/2007 11:21:16 PM

HelenaTroy

Posts: 93
Joined: 8/20/2007
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I don't really prefer the torment as much as I prefer the tease! Teasing can be torment too. ;)

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RE: Petty torments - 8/30/2007 12:56:15 AM

ClandestinedOne

Posts: 91
Joined: 3/31/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: homedespot

My slave and I have discussed this at legenth. The difference between being a bully and exerting My dominance for My pleasure. He knows that if I order him to kiss My feet in Starbucks he must do that...but to do it only to do it is petty or bullying IN MY WORLD. If I have to ask him to get Me sugar in My Starbucks and he stares at Me blankly and says "get your own damn sugar" then making him kneel to Me in Starbucks is exerting My dominance for a reason. (I'm not suggesting subjecting vanilla people to My life I'm using an extreme example)

We both enjoy the little things I can do to show My control over him but many of the things you listed seem like punishment to Me and not dominance. I will often make him wear something small like a cock ring or a ribbon or string for the day. Not painful but a small reminder. I order for him in a restaurant but not things he hates to eat. I limit the number of beers he can have because I don't like beery men etc.

Being petty (or as I call it, bullying) isn't the dynamic of our relationship.

J

in my humble opinion it sounds like Y/you two share a wonderful relationship, and he sounds very lucky to have You. God bless you both. :)

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RE: Petty torments - 8/30/2007 1:11:32 AM

Solaise

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I'm still trying to wrap my head around the sub sitting on a softball while driving.

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RE: Petty torments - 8/30/2007 7:29:23 PM

EternalInferno

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For me this depends on the submissive. I tend to show a lot more control in the begining to establish our positions. I don't torment just to torment unless it is a sweet torment I am after. I do torment for punishment or reminders of some sort. Typically in my relationships, the need for a lot of correction/torment etc needs to be limited because I just don't have the time or temperment to deal with lessons not learned. But there are times when it is just too tempting to make things I order a challenge!

I might have them wear something to remind them of me, like a special collar or binding of some sort on a hidden spot while at work or make them do something that takes two hands with one hand tied or talk with something in their mouth. I just go with whatever seems right at the moment! lol

< Message edited by EternalInferno -- 8/30/2007 7:35:44 PM >

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RE: Petty torments - 8/31/2007 1:18:18 PM

MistressShuggie

Posts: 24
Joined: 5/4/2007
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I'm not petty as a rule. Either you suffer and you won't consider it petty or you don't suffer.

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RE: Petty torments - 8/31/2007 2:52:44 PM

earthycouple

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Nope. I don't believe in being mean just to be mean or torment just to torment (in a negative way) those I love. And if he belongs to me....I love him. Oh...how I love....

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RE: Petty torments - 8/31/2007 9:48:01 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aimtoplease101

I recently watched Silence of the Lambs again, in one scene of which Hannibal remarks about the "petty torments" to which his jailer subjects him. It reminded me of a comment that Smythe made on this board once about how when she went out with her boy to a restaurant, she would order him the most unappetizing thing on the menu {Smythe-- not calling you petty here-- just linking up the thoughts[;)}. I've heard of other Dommes making their subs walk around with beebees (sp?) in their shoes, drive while sitting on a softball, or pour hot sauce all over their meals, etc. These torments are usually non-sexual in nature, and more control driven than anything else.

Do you engage in any little torment games with your subs, "just because you can?" If so, what are they?

Regards, ATP

I remember responding to Smythe's thread and I'm sure I said something similar to what I'm about to say here

. Master never does anything just to prove He can/just because He can. He and I both are fully aware that He can do anything He chooses to. He doesn't have to do deliberately unpleasant or tormenting things to prove it and He just simply does not enjoy doing so.

However, if there is something He enjoys doing to me or having me do that I find unpleasant or tormenting, that will happen. The key is whether or not He finds it pleasurable. He never does things that He doesn't get pleasure from just because He can. There's nothing to prove and His time is too valuable to waste doing things neither of us enjoy

..............luci

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RE: Petty torments - 8/31/2007 10:40:56 PM

DivaZya

Posts: 103
Joined: 2/15/2005
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I say yess.
My part time submissive is so easy to torment - it's actually exactly what he's signed on for.
He never stands in My presence, I sometimes distract him by leaving on a bdsm oriented video on when he visits to clean up My bathroom, detail the kitchen and make up My bed.
I will brush past him with My stockings or stand over him as he works, smack his ass out of the way to potty if I need to and he's still cleaning - he must kneel and wait, then re-clean. Course I don't sex him or even love him, he's at a fine level, and I suppose after 7 years of intermittent day visits and advancing levels of cleaning - I'm kind of fond of him now.
Certainly experienced enough now to help train another, yet he seeks to be the clean EVERYTHING up boy.
Not like the pet I had, I decided the paper was too dry and that made him happy. silly boys, there's always something just out of their reach.

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RE: Petty torments - 9/1/2007 8:54:40 AM

hardbodysub

Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: homedespot

My slave and I have discussed this at legenth. The difference between being a bully and exerting My dominance for My pleasure. He knows that if I order him to kiss My feet in Starbucks he must do that...but to do it only to do it is petty or bullying IN MY WORLD. If I have to ask him to get Me sugar in My Starbucks and he stares at Me blankly and says "get your own damn sugar" then making him kneel to Me in Starbucks is exerting My dominance for a reason. (I'm not suggesting subjecting vanilla people to My life I'm using an extreme example)

We both enjoy the little things I can do to show My control over him but many of the things you listed seem like punishment to Me and not dominance. I will often make him wear something small like a cock ring or a ribbon or string for the day. Not painful but a small reminder. I order for him in a restaurant but not things he hates to eat. I limit the number of beers he can have because I don't like beery men etc.

Being petty (or as I call it, bullying) isn't the dynamic of our relationship.

J

As I read it, the meaning of the word petty here is more along the lines of minor, or trifling, rather than bullying or mean-spirited. Such trifling torments would definitely be a very effective and excting reminder of who's in control, and I, for one, am all for it!

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