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No luck finding Goddess - 9/2/2007 4:50:32 AM

underyourshoe

Posts: 18
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

i have had no luck finding a Goddess to serve. im 22 and in the UK. i have seen a pro domme on 2 occasions but i fell i now need a 'real' element to it, with a normal Woman who likes to dominate. where am i going wrong? everyone on here i talk to just wants money straight away, while i dont have a problem with giving money to my eventual owner i just dont know what to do. any help appreciated.

Post #: 1

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 9/2/2007 4:57:48 AM

LadySSbbwRose

Posts: 5
Joined: 10/2/2006
Status: offline

I think you might try and find out where your local Munch is. If you go look at www.infomedconsent.co.uk they have list of local Munches.

LadyRose.

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 2

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 9/2/2007 6:14:14 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Agreed. It is possible to find One that you will make a connection with online, but it's a much simpler process in the real world.

I have a lot more faith in those who show up for real meetings.

(in reply to LadySSbbwRose)

Post #: 3

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 9/2/2007 6:20:25 AM

DianeB269

Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline

Also try hanging out at shops that sell fetish gear. I met one of my subs at a shop.
Go to some fetish clubs too. I've met some very interesting people at the fetish clubs
here in S.F. over the years.

Diane

< Message edited by DianeB269 -- 9/2/2007 6:35:06 AM >

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 4

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 9/2/2007 6:42:24 AM

underyourshoe

Posts: 18
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

thankyou all so much for your tips.

(in reply to DianeB269)

Post #: 5

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 9/2/2007 8:12:08 AM

pixelslave

Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline

If you do want to try and meet someone through CM, you need to work on your profile. While you may want to keep it simple as you have stated in your current one. The ladies here will want to know what you have to offer them as a submissive and also your vanilla interests; which they'll want to have match with some of theirs.

You've also emphasized your desire to serve a "really beautiful Goddess" which comes across to me as being rather superficial. To me, beauty is something that comes from within and is also very subjective. I suggest you take the time to get to know a woman first before you decide just how beautiful she is. In my experience, the more I've gotten to know a woman, the more attractive most have become; in some cases, eventually to the exclusion of all others. Some women may not feel beautiful until you show them through your actions just how beautiful they really are.

- pixel

Collared to Majik

_____________________________

Chivalry isn't dead! It's for those who have it in their hearts & are willing to be taught. It's a way of life, a code of honor; this one's armor still needs some polishing!

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 6

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/19/2007 6:11:32 PM

bulejkt1972

Posts: 32
Joined: 9/7/2007
Status: offline

I agree with Pixel

Also this question is constantly coming up, and it would seem that the problem is usually based on the same few aspects.

It doesn't have to be impossible to find a partner via the internet, but there are a few golden rules (some of which also apply to meetings irl).

Your profile is actually quite ok - but perhaps a little "colourless". Nobody will probably doubt your sincerety, but try to be a little UNIQUE in what you say - a little interesting - maybe even a bit entertaining if possible :-)

And then show a realistic picture of yourself. I know many are a bit nervous about that - usually they are afraid to get recognized by family and friends but a picture is still a good thing. We like to see the one we communicate with.

Thirdly, the internet is a really fine way to get to know the other person if you use it well and communicate openly and honestly about your self. But bear in mind that many (probably a majority of) Women have BAD experiences with fakers and players online. That's just a regrettable fact. That's also why you should be willing to move the conversation to other media - like a phone conversation and ideally a meeting irl. And remember that a first meeting can easily be on neutral ground (for example in a café) where both of you have a reasonable chance to check each other out a bit before committing to any thing further.

Then let me also say that I think it's fine that you at such a relatively young age can come out clear about your sexuality and need to submit. Good for you!

By the way, is there by any chance a local bdsm-club or organisation in your town? That can be a super way to get in touch with like-minded people.

Hope you get lucky :-) And let me finish by saying that it's not an easy task for me either - mainly because the bdsm-life style is virtually non-existing in my city - I honestly don't think there is one single Dominant Woman with in 1.000 km :-) At least you should be a bit better off in that regard...

Best wishes and go get Them, the wonderful Goddesses :-)

h

(in reply to pixelslave)

Post #: 7

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/20/2007 8:55:34 AM

stella41b

Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline

To me the most obvious is quit looking for a Goddess - that way you're actually insulting a woman by objectifying and fetishizing her. It might seem romantic to you. To her it's extremely off-putting and offensive.

She's a woman, nothing more, nothing less, that's how she wants to be perceived, that's how she wants to be accepted - for the woman she is, not for the woman you want her to be.

By all means keep the Goddess bit as a dream, it will motivate you to keep searching through many an empty lifeless day and many a lonely night, but no woman will ever want to be a Goddess or treated as such unless she's convinced that you are, can, and need to be the right person to treat her like a Goddess.

Until then I'd stick to looking for a female friend with whom you can talk and share your common interests and get to know each other.

You might not fulfill the Goddess part of your dream for another 10, 20, 30, or even 40 years. You might not ever even get to fulfill that Goddess part of your dream. But be sure that in looking for female friends and companions with which to share interests, life, problems, needs and desires you'll get to meet a lot of interesting women and you won't really be lonely.

And you might even find one with an even better dream than your Goddess dream.

Worth thinking about?

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 8

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/20/2007 11:43:49 AM

sammyBoy1980

Posts: 17
Joined: 6/13/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: underyourshoe

i have had no luck finding a Goddess to serve. im 22 and in the UK. i have seen a pro domme on 2 occasions but i fell i now need a 'real' element to it, with a normal Woman who likes to dominate. where am i going wrong? everyone on here i talk to just wants money straight away, while i dont have a problem with giving money to my eventual owner i just dont know what to do. any help appreciated.

lol, your even lucky you got anyone to talk to you. i havent even managed to get a domina/Mistress to reply....

i think they are only interested in rich older dudes.

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 9

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/20/2007 11:46:28 AM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sammyBoy1980

quote:

ORIGINAL: underyourshoe

i have had no luck finding a Goddess to serve. im 22 and in the UK. i have seen a pro domme on 2 occasions but i fell i now need a 'real' element to it, with a normal Woman who likes to dominate. where am i going wrong? everyone on here i talk to just wants money straight away, while i dont have a problem with giving money to my eventual owner i just dont know what to do. any help appreciated.

lol, your even lucky you got anyone to talk to you. i havent even managed to get a domina/Mistress to reply....

i think they are only interested in rich older dudes.

I am not looking for a rich, older dude. I am looking for a hot, young, poor college student or around that age to objectify and use in very specific ways, with no strings attached. I don't want a boyfriend. I also don't accept gifts or money for consideration, I simply have to be attracted to someone. So if you can't really complain if you want a woman who wants you for *who* you are and what you represent (not how much money you give her) and are not striking gold or swimming in offers -- after all, these women are obviously looking for something very specific. It doesn't happen overnight.

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to sammyBoy1980)

Post #: 10

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/20/2007 12:09:18 PM

PrettyOHDomme

Posts: 61
Joined: 8/26/2007
Status: offline

Aakasha, I love your posts, as always. I second the hot, young, poor college student for objectification.

I also second the idea that Dommes are generally looking for something specific. Do the submissive men outnumber the dominant women? Absolutely. Does that mean you'll never find the One for you? Not at all.

Be patient, be friendly, be polite, be honest.

Post more. Become active in the local community.

It will happen.

Best,

Miss Ellen

(in reply to AAkasha)

Post #: 11

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/20/2007 1:30:58 PM

MightyAphrodite

Posts: 6
Joined: 2/21/2006
Status: offline

well said stella.

(in reply to stella41b)

Post #: 12

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/21/2007 12:59:22 AM

slavekal

Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline

There are so many avenues. Collarme as well as other alternative sites, parties (You have Club Pedestal in UK. Wish I did). There may be women all around you every day who secretly long to dominate you. You have to do the work to find out. Check out my blog. I did a post about finding a Mistress. http://slave2catwoman.blogspot.com/

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 13

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/21/2007 6:07:44 PM

moki1984

Posts: 274
Joined: 2/22/2007
Status: offline

it is a hard road to find someone you click with, that is in the same location as you or able to relocate....etc. its not easy to find an owner/sub..so simply be patient and look. try to find the local events more so than internet

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 14

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/21/2007 7:43:29 PM

slavekal

Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline

Use every avenue, fetish parties, answer ads, place ads, ask out women who appear "vanilla", cuz you never know. I have to respectfully disagree with pixelslave. If you desire a beautiful woman, there is nothing wrong with that, as long as you are not a TOTAL Shallow Hal. Physical attraction is important. It does not make you a bad guy.

(in reply to moki1984)

Post #: 15

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/22/2007 5:01:59 PM

MuscleCuteClever

Posts: 61
Joined: 9/12/2007
Status: offline

The UK isnt the best of places, especially on CM. I wouldnt bank on finding a Domme from the UK on CM if you ask me. Otherwise slavekal is right, most women in everyday life dont judge you for it if you present it reasonably.

(in reply to slavekal)

Post #: 16

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/23/2007 5:46:02 AM

Goddess20

Posts: 73
Joined: 7/12/2007
From: Birmingham, England
Status: offline

To be honest its like finding a normal relationship, its unlikely to happen on the net, reading type, and staring at a still photo.

Go to fetish shops, local meetings and things like that.

From My experience alot of Dommes on the net are either not looking for subs and are just on here for convosation or are after money (Myself included, being a Pro Domme) It will be very hard finding you Domme on the net.

Get away from the computer and out in the cold British winter and find your rubber clad Goddess.

(in reply to underyourshoe)

Post #: 17

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/23/2007 5:06:27 PM

RosesHaveThorns

Posts: 312
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline

1) Clean it up a bit, capitalize some words, fix up the grammar, etc.
2) Paragraph breaks.
3) More about yourself! And remove the "It may be boring thing". If you want a relationship, then she should want the man outside of the bedroom as well as in. She won't find it boring, and you should think of it that way. advertising it as boring seems to emphasize that you only want sex, which probably isn't going to help you. Write more on yourself, perhaps say what personality types you like, perhaps. Any other hobbies. What sort of relationship you want. Intellectual pursuits.

As for the beautiful thing...Most, if not all, of us want someone who is beautiful. The problem comes when we only want them for that beauty, or we think that only supermodels are beautiful.

And last of all: Don't insult Dommes in general. Not that you did, but no one likes someone calling them sour grapes.

(And it seems to be a trend here)

(in reply to Goddess20)

Post #: 18

RE: No luck finding Goddess - 10/23/2007 7:25:16 PM

slavekal

Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline

In the UK, you have Club Pedestal. I would certainly hit those events if I lived there. Looks like submissive male/dominant woman heaven to me.

(in reply to RosesHaveThorns)

Post #: 19

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