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subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 1:45:13 PM

wantbegoodsub

Posts: 1
Joined: 9/2/2007
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Hi Ladies,

I would like to ask how would you handle your sub's jealousness.

I mean if you on party, and flirting with other men... does your sub appear to be jealous?

Or imagine you have a nice 4yrs relationship with your sub. He is good in bed, he cares about the house well, etc..
You recently found a new boy and you decided to have two subs. You want to have the new-one as a bedroom slave and the old one more service oriented. The pronblem is that your sub might be jealous... How would you make him to be ok with that?

Perhaps he will need some help to adapt on his new role... Would you help him with some punishments, etc...?

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 1:48:32 PM

TexasMaam

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
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I imagine that if I had a nice 4 yr relationship with a sub who was good in bed, cared for the house well, etc, and I decided to take some other sub as an alpha, that I could expect to lose the sub of 4 yrs and that he'd probably punish Me by leaving!

Good subs are hard to find. Hard subs are even better. I'll keep Mine - and I'll make every effort not to give him reason to be jealous.

; )

TM

< Message edited by TexasMaam -- 9/2/2007 1:49:39 PM >

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 1:49:04 PM

earthycouple

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Joined: 2/19/2006
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first of all it is jealousy not jealousness.

Second. he'd know ahead of time if this may occur. If he was jealous as a rule, he would not work for my household and never enter.

< Message edited by earthycouple -- 9/2/2007 1:50:23 PM >

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 1:52:26 PM

TexasMaam

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...something in the vernacular of the OP's initial post leads Me to believe that perhaps English is not their first language. TM

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 1:53:43 PM

earthycouple

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quite possibly. if so, now the OP knows something new.

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 3:48:18 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
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I am not one for numbers, so you will not find Me flirting or playing games when I have claimed a submissive.

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 3:54:20 PM

shyinini

Posts: 550
Joined: 5/4/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: wantbegoodsub

Hi Ladies,

I would like to ask how would you handle your sub's jealousness.

I mean if you on party, and flirting with other men... does your sub appear to be jealous?

Or imagine you have a nice 4yrs relationship with your sub. He is good in bed, he cares about the house well, etc..
You recently found a new boy and you decided to have two subs. You want to have the new-one as a bedroom slave and the old one more service oriented. The pronblem is that your sub might be jealous... How would you make him to be ok with that?

Perhaps he will need some help to adapt on his new role... Would you help him with some punishments, etc...?

He/she doesnt need to adapt to anything....
He/she has a right to walk off cause you have chosen to find another and lessen his/her value in your eyes.

If I were punished for having a brain, needs and desires, I'd say my Sir is callous and his integrity flew out the window when his cock got in the way of his integrity.

This is NOT a question of subs jealousy but of your selfish ego and sexual appetities.

Sir's girl

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 4:10:28 PM

Grlwithboy

Posts: 655
Joined: 2/8/2005
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It's abundantly clear to everyone in my household that nobody else is leaving because you might not like it.

Fortunately, they like each other and would not want anyone to want out, either.

My sexual appetites *are* indeed selfish. I will fuck whomever I want, whenever and why ever, and everyone knows that. That's something they like about me. I didn't spring it on anyone 4 years in though, I've been doing the groundwork from moment 1 to make sure that that is understood.

< Message edited by Grlwithboy -- 9/2/2007 4:13:32 PM >

(in reply to shyinini)

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 5:32:51 PM

queencaliph

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Hi Grlwithboy; you make a very important point here. If polyandry was the basis of the relationship from the beginning then there would be no issue. But if a Domme allows her partner to think that a relationship is going to be monogamous and then changes the rules 4 years later, that is more than a matter of mere jealousy. That is a very serious relationship problem and the sub would be justified in leaving the relationship.

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 5:52:32 PM

Lashra

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I have a wonderful male sub why would I want to flirt with someone else and make him jealous? Answer is: I wouldn't. I am happy with what I have. Good subs are hard to find, subs that are good and that you love and they love you, is even harder.

~Lashra

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/2/2007 8:22:57 PM

arayofsunshine55

Posts: 545
Joined: 8/1/2004
From: San Francisco, CA
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I'm a flirt. If it walks and is interesting and attractive, 2 legs or 4, I'll flirt. Folks in my life have to be OK with that. And I am Ok with them doing the same. Understanding what ever agreements we have come to. Together. Bring someone else in and kick the one of 4 years to the maids room? Can't imagine. True compatibility to too hard to come by. What I seek is someone else I can love. A bottom or switch who I can love and who can count on that love. And on me prioritizing our relationship. And when I get that? Fuck, nothing will shake me loose.

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(in reply to wantbegoodsub)

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/3/2007 4:58:30 AM

e01n

Posts: 1472
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A contrary view:
Me, I grew up in a poly home and consider myself poly. But there's a part of me that wants to be the only person that She desires sexually... that all other "dalliances" are superfluous and unnecessary, in the same way that I find myself totally with Her.

And that's sort of fine - as long as I don't restrain Her beyond agreed upon states.

When that "want" becomes "need," then it's a problem. It goes from desire to being survival, with the associated baggage of that term. One would hope that there'd be a conversation before it reached that point, even if it ended in "this isn't going to work."

(in reply to arayofsunshine55)

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RE: subs jealousness - 9/16/2007 1:50:15 AM

jimheath

Posts: 8
Joined: 8/11/2007
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as a slave, I don't think I have a right to comment or be jealous of a Mistress who spends time with another. Who she sees is her business. My place is to trust her that she still cares for me, and the decisions she makes are the right ones

(in reply to e01n)

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Post #: 13