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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 9/29/2007 12:56:49 AM   
came4U


Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline
quote:

Recently, I spoke to a friend of mine, who is a Dominant and we talked about a situation in which another Dom placed a submissive under his protection, only he didn't know that another Dom was talking to her and that caused him to foolishly make some remarks that caused friction between the three of them. Based on what I was told, I wonder, if these things cause jealousy among Doms and if so, how would you deal with it?


As far as I know the 'under protection' term as being used on the internet includes the so-called dominant being her 'internet' protector.  As far as stupid internet rules go..she is supposed to notify if 'protected' of whom she is talking to and it should be of no surprise to either party.  Not to mention a protector (god knows why anyone would need one) is of mentor quality not one of jealous reaction.  How goofy this whole transpiration this has become.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 9/29/2007 4:29:45 PM   
SirEbonyPhoenix


Posts: 195
Joined: 8/29/2006
From: My realm in Central Indiana (you guess where :P)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

SirEbonyPhoenix, what do you mean by "under protection" and what was the context? looking for an r/t partner? or just chat?

My experience has been that "under protection" means that another Dominant is guiding the sub in a nonsexual manner to help pick a Dom, talk to Doms etcetera.  The context I've seen it come in has always been in online roleplay situations.  I would find it odd for someone to have a "protector" if they are looking for r/t, I mean if you're going to play with them don't you think you should be able to talk to them without help?  Although I have been contacted for third persons looking for another, I've always declined to talk to the third, it seems kind of 8th gradish "someone has a crush on you" to me, personally.

I think the concept might be ok for new subs, but the relationship between the two people d/s or m/s is so intimate that having a third person interjected into it seems offensive.  I'm not sure this is what I would think of as typical jealousy as much as a very uncomfortable situation. 
l


When I learned of this situation, it was to my understanding that it was going to be real time and that she was under his protection in that aspect, with the hopes that T/they wanted to be T/together at some point. As to having a third person involved, it is also to my understanding that she was the one who talked to another Dom without her protector's knowledge, so in that respect, she chose to do that and as such, she is partially responsible for failing to inform him. I personally will not do online protection with any sub/slave because to me, it serves no purpose other than to have my time wasted. Besides that, and as an owned slave once told me, "If it isn't real time, it's not a relationship." And this is a lesson for any new sub (as well as Doms) to bear in mind, but she chose to do what she did, ergo, she's taking some time away from the lifestyle as I also understand that she has some emotional baggage, which I hope she will get counseling for because no Dom that I know of wants a sub/slave who is unsure of what she wants based on her emotional or mental health. But then, this is only my own humble opinion, for what it's worth.

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(in reply to laurell3)
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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/22/2007 12:59:02 PM   
ClassyPainToy


Posts: 5
Joined: 8/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Areflectionofyou

pssssttttt ...guess what i live with my Master...lol is that cyber....hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm don't think so


LMAO.....typical of you to assume, but  I was not referring to "Dezzy" or your current living arrangement...AND you do know that you owned a cyber collar in the past.....or should I further elaborate for clarity? My dear sweet pett (hint hint) dont condem others so hastilly.  You, have indeed, boasted a cyber collar in the past or did you not? 

(in reply to Areflectionofyou)
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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/22/2007 1:07:37 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Did you bump this in order to work some past vendetta?  Lame.

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(in reply to ClassyPainToy)
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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/22/2007 1:10:09 PM   
OldBastardly1


Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline 		"under protection" "training collar" "collar of consideration" etc. all make me think wayyy back to younger days, when it was common to hear someone say " I have dibs on that, nobody else can have it"....it all just makes me giggle like a little bitch

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Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad



(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/22/2007 1:19:19 PM   
OldBastardly1


Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline 		Wow, I just noticed the time span. Yes, that was lame to bounce this back up after so long. tsk tsk tsk.

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Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad



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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/22/2007 7:08:09 PM   
desertdancer


Posts: 1095
Joined: 5/12/2006
Status: offline 		* sighs*  Why oh why didn't I check the Op's date of posting.. what a waste of time.

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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/23/2007 7:26:58 AM   
ForcefuIHands


Posts: 47
Joined: 11/28/2005
Status: offline 		Points for the use of the term "e-peen" on this thread.

I hate to say, but this situation seems like one of those issues where the people who need the information are likely not the ones reading it, to the folly and amusement of those that exactly don't need it, and thus, annoyance... To give an example, we had a policy at work of equipment getting theoretically lost or stolen, and so the managers instituted several procedures to keep track of said equipment. Except the kind of people who can't take care of equipment aren't exactly the type to be responsible enough to do things like log in a book when they obviously haven't grasped the concept of putting something back where it belongs.

I have been the "under protection/consideration" guy at various times in the last decade. Namely, it's usually less about jealousy and possessiveness and more about the understanding that for every rational, capable person out there, there are a few dozen idiots flashing pictures of their genitals and sending them en masse. Maybe I thought the idea that someone was looking out for a submissive meant that might dampen those idiots a little. Maybe I was just logging equipment myself.

Now, excuse me, I'm going to go waggle my e-peen.

(in reply to desertdancer)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/25/2007 1:23:35 PM   
ligar59


Posts: 55
Joined: 9/11/2005
Status: offline 		Jealousy is an emotion that serves no purpose. It is something that we as adults, should have put behind us along time ago, like after we left the sandbox and jungle jims.

(in reply to SirEbonyPhoenix)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/25/2007 1:40:31 PM   
sazmira


Posts: 12
Joined: 11/19/2007
Status: offline 		Me? I'd point and laugh. A lot.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/26/2007 10:57:34 AM   
SirEbonyPhoenix


Posts: 195
Joined: 8/29/2006
From: My realm in Central Indiana (you guess where :P)
Status: offline 		Remember, you said it, I didn't! :P

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"If it takes one to know one, then you must be one."

(in reply to desertdancer)
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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/26/2007 1:30:46 PM   
TheScrivener


Posts: 91
Joined: 8/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Estring

I graduated from high school a long time ago.


I'm only 4 years removed, however...

Amen to that.


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- Bill Hicks


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RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 12/30/2007 9:55:08 AM   
GentleandStrict


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline 		Jealosuy is a nasty thing.  It's human nature that is hard to control.  I think the best thing for a Dom to do when he feels jealousy is try his best to supress it and take control of it before he lashes out. 

I think the girl is to blame for this one.  She should of been honest with both of the Dominants.  But as we all know Online relationships usualy is full of drama.



(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Jealousy among Doms:How do you deal with it? - 1/1/2008 10:39:22 PM   
dogobedience


Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline 		The alpha male will win, the beta male dom can become his BOY.

However few splittails are worth the fight.

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

(in reply to SirEbonyPhoenix)
Profile   Post #: 34
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