BDsbabygirl
Posts: 115
Joined: 7/9/2007
Status: offline
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Hi, CatKnight, welcome aboard. 
I too am somewhat new to this world, but I'll answer as to my own relationship as you requested...Big Daddy and I are completely exclusive to each other, as in NO others, be it for sex, sexual play, non-sexual play, or even just casually 'chatting' online. In fact, he tells me that when we started off as "just friends" in the vanilla world, he really wanted more (told me last night he wanted me so badly he thought he would go mad!) and to that end, when he began to see that he really might have a chance with me, he immediately released an LDR slave that he had because he wanted to be exclusive even though we weren't actually anything beyond friends at that point.
But. My Dom also knows that I am very much interested in exploring the side of me that's interested in women. I would never ever do so outside of his knowledge and without his permission, though, since we are monogamous. Still, with this knowledge in mind, alot of our fantasy talk (like during phone sex) centers around our bringing in another woman, mostly for me, though he would be included a little if I was comforable with it and I am in fact still sorting out my feelings on that; sometimes the idea of him being given a blowjob or having anal - activites I've never been too wild about but engage in the former for him and am actually interested in the latter because it's with him, but I digress - with another female makes me incredibly horny and other times it makes be so jealous I want to start throwing stuff. I asked him if this was all talk or if he'd bring it in R/L. He said that eventually he'd like to bring it to R/L, not because he wants it (he's already been there, done that, as with much of our activity *sigh* but that's a whole other story) but because I do and he wants me to be happy and fulfilled, not ignoring a desire of mine because we are together. However, something like this is a long ways off, I imagine, as we've only been together, romantically, for just over three months now, which means we're still getting established. Also, when this does happen, it would not be a permanent thing, i.e. she would not be added in, making us polyamorous, for neither of us is interested in that; the activity would be more like a one-night stand kind of thing or perhaps even two times but not ongoing or in the context of a relationship with this female, even though full precautions would be taken for health purposes.
Also, while I did mention that we don't engage in chatting online, there is one thing my Dom does that I'm mostly fine with (I says "mostly" because I do sometimes feel a miniscule pang of jealousy): long before we got together, he became a co-Administator at a Gorean Role-Play site and he still engages in that but only rarely. In that world, he does have a few Gorean slaves but this is all role-play. Neither he, nor anyone else there, is at all interested in meeting in real life, it's just an online game for them. Still, since it is something, I thought I'd include it, as well.
As you yourself and the others above me have already mentioned, in your case, the best thing to do is communicate and establish guidelines NOW, before you're too deeply in, if your're not already. When I realized I was falling in love with my Master, I made absolutely certain of his intentions, figuring I'd break it off before it was too late if he wanted to see others because I knew it was something I couldn't handle; I figured better a little pain then than a whole lot of heartache later.
Whatever happens, I wish you the best. Good Luck.
_____________________________
~ Captured by My Dominance, enslaved by My love ~ -- Big Daddy
Collared by Master Big Daddy on Monday, 7/23/07 at 2:35pm
Into scat play? Boycott shampoo; demand the real poo!
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Exclusive relationships defined? - 
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