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wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 9:07:20 AM   
Perplex


Posts: 110
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		This isn't really a question, just a place for me to brag I think and complain a little bit too I'm sure.

My wife doesn't like to scene with me, now that maybe cuz I suck at it, I do highly understand the possiblity of that one :)  what I'm told is that she trusts me too much to know she can't hit my buttons to keep her from "getting out" of something.  Of the two I'd probably side with the "suck at it" option if I was a third party looking in. 

However yesterday a friend who had been using our house as a layover pointed something out that I hadn't really seen before... Understand who my friend is, he is this huge summoan man with the kabukiesque facial hair growth and muscles...I mean my god the muscles in his forearms make my thighs go "wow those are some big muscles"....anyway he is an old Gorean, super hardcore, has meant it for years, has the whole sword collection on the wall thing going on, he used to be a wrestler some of you'd recognize his name, but now that hardbodies are the fad he just teaches...anyway he's always teased me cuz "Mic you let your women get away with murder"....and then the rants of a woman's place begins.  With my first wife this ussually ended up with me hustling him out the door before the question was answered "who'd win? a salad shooter up the pooper or the wrestler"...

but yesterday he and I were carrying stuff into the house, ok he was carrying I was more or less being a cheerleader, but at least I have the knees for it...and we get done and sit down at the computers so he can do his business, my wife comes home just a little bit later they say their hellos and I give up my computer so she can check her mail etc.  I get a look from my friend saying I shouldn't do things like that and have tesitcles.  So I sit on the floor and continue to train our puppy and ask her if she can make me tea and coffee, she gets up  from her CM mail and gets them...and my friend rushes me, picks me up and busts me right on the mouth (and you ain't lived til you been frenched by a 400lb summoan with pig bristles for chin whiskers) saying that I finnaly made it to "the club" of getting "my woman trained"...

After we dropped him off at the airport I thought about it, i never formally trained my wife, and everybody from her daddy to last husband would have agreed she coudln't be trained she serves cuz she enjoys the service (and me not bitching/moaning and doing the bart simpson "so thirrrrsssttyy" thing) and after some more thought, I figured out I would take coffee on demand over a blowjob anytime, sex is too easy to come by but a good cup of cofee that's something you still write home about. 

anyway just a slice of life, no need to tell me how stupid (in the countless ways) I am for thinking x, y, or z.  no need to write looking for an autograph from my friend, he's alreayd in costa rica on a recruiting tour and no need to write and ask me to make you a better cheerleader, it's in the knees, its natural or you cant' do it. :)
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 9:58:12 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		She got you one cup of coffee when you asked and you think that she is trained?????  The moderator is a woman and she is trained to pull this post.

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 12:48:23 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Tell your friend to stop commenting on your relationship. Because if you want to let her check her email, or perhaps use that as an excuse to not have to talk with the blowhard, that's your choice and hers.

But day in, day out, the little things like coffee or tea count more than the big ones. There are times I beg off of play but I'm always picking up his dirty socks from wherever they land when he takes them off.

And if I were your wife and had had to listen to this man expound on how everyone else should run their relationship, I would have invented excuses not to come home before ten at night. What works for the two of you is what is important, not what gets him hot.

Speaking of which, is he happily married? Because if not he obviously has no clue about the negotiations and compromises, and sheer time invested, to work out a marriage that satisfies both people's needs.

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 1:26:20 PM   
okiniiri


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/19/2006
Status: offline 		What gives this guy the right to comment on your relationship? Does your wife want to be trained, submissive, anything, or are you just pretending that she's being trained because you get a kick out of it? Why are you commenting on a dynamic that you don't even have?
And what does this post have to do with its title?
(i'm also wondering about why one can't be trained if they serve because they enjoy it, but i'm already confused enough, i don't even want to think about it...)

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 2:22:48 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex
...and my friend rushes me, picks me up and busts me right on the mouth (and you ain't lived til you been frenched by a 400lb summoan with pig bristles for chin whiskers) saying that I finnaly made it to "the club" of getting "my woman trained"...



I think he was just waiting for an excuse to smooch ya!  :)

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 2:30:18 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline 		*laughs softly*  Sir shakes his head about my husband.  i DO all those things for him, you know?  coffee in bed, get his tea, fix his plate, make sure he has clean clothes, all the good things, and i do them without thinking about them.

Sir shakes his head....because even though wolf is spoiled to my ways, he says he doesnt like it or want me to do so. but he whines that his g/f wont.  *eyeroll*

ah well.  good for you that your friend approved.  and yay guys kissing!!  *grins*

kitten

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 2:46:44 PM   
MstrSkyWoIf


Posts: 238
Joined: 10/26/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex

My wife doesn't like to scene with me, now that maybe cuz I suck at it, I do highly understand the possibility of that one :)  what I'm told is that she trusts me too much to know she can't hit my buttons to keep her from "getting out" of something.  Of the two I'd probably side with the "suck at it" option if I was a third party looking in. 


Out of your whole long post the above statement is what jumped out at me. I think the underling trouble is in your view of yourself it is hard to BE Dominant to your wife if you think you suck at it. For a woman to submit to a Man she must feel your Comments.. If you don't feel dominant you cant be dominant.. Remember what the mind believes and conceived it will achieve. If in your mind you suck at being dominant your mind wants you to achieve  your goal and you will subconsciously do things to achieve that gaol. Example you asked for coffee instead of telling her to get it. It is the little things and the way the come out and across that make you seem Dominant to people around you.

I do not believe you need be an asshole to be dominant you just need to be firm and direct in your desires. A D/s relationship and marriage is a relationship and there must be communication but if your Wife is truly submissive and not just a bedroom submissive she more then likely craves for you something you are not projecting because of this feeling you have of being NOT GOOD AT IT. Get past this feeling and you may be surprised at the relationship strength you develop with your wife.

Understand I am not saying this is the only way it will work but to add that feeling I see you are looking for in your post if I read it correct you need to get past this I am not good at it feeling and belief.


< Message edited by MstrSkyWoIf -- 9/12/2007 2:49:35 PM >

_____________________________

this is just my opinion, I do not claim to be an expert on life. I am just Me, Love me or Hate me I really don't care. I am the culmination of my life's experiences. I am an ever changing block of clay molded by life's experiences on a daily basis.

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 2:48:15 PM   
MstrSkyWoIf


Posts: 238
Joined: 10/26/2005
Status: offline 		oops

< Message edited by MstrSkyWoIf -- 9/12/2007 2:50:16 PM >

_____________________________

this is just my opinion, I do not claim to be an expert on life. I am just Me, Love me or Hate me I really don't care. I am the culmination of my life's experiences. I am an ever changing block of clay molded by life's experiences on a daily basis.

(in reply to MstrSkyWoIf)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 3:26:52 PM   
Perplex


Posts: 110
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		it's a good point wolf...

I don't think that's my problem, I know how good I am, I just didn't want to come across like one of the 1.5 millon poser dewds who get on a B/D forum and say "It can't be me, I never make any mistakes" so it was at least partially self deprication.

There are a lot of people better at toys/tools than I am, my techinque while not olympics grade is passable, where I shine is the long term head trip with RP fantasies along the way.  but thank you for the observation, it's always helpful to hear stuff you don't see yourself.

(in reply to MstrSkyWoIf)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 3:27:58 PM   
NamelessOne


Posts: 2
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

She got you one cup of coffee when you asked and you think that she is trained?????  The moderator is a woman and she is trained to pull this post.


As the wife in question, I would respectfully submit that it wasn't just ONE cup of coffee, it's been over 15 years worth of cups...and for Perplex this behavior has come as naturally as breathing to me, when in my other relationships I would have never even thought about serving that way.  With respect, as always...

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 3:29:56 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline 		("vs"...not "vrs"...if it was "vrs"...it'd be "vrs's").

But it's not.

(See above).

< Message edited by Griswold -- 9/12/2007 3:31:24 PM >

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 3:36:09 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex
I was more or less being a cheerleader, but at least I have the knees for it...


Never knew cheerleaders had good knees.  Have I been looking in the wrong direction all this time?


_____________________________



(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 3:42:18 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex

This isn't really a question, just a place for me to brag I think and complain a little bit too I'm sure.

My wife doesn't like to scene with me, now that maybe cuz I suck at it, I do highly understand the possiblity of that one :)  what I'm told is that she trusts me too much to know she can't hit my buttons to keep her from "getting out" of something.  Of the two I'd probably side with the "suck at it" option if I was a third party looking in. 

However yesterday a friend who had been using our house as a layover pointed something out that I hadn't really seen before... Understand who my friend is, he is this huge summoan (Samoan) man with the kabukiesque (I have NO fucking idea what the fuck THAT word is) facial hair growth and muscles...I mean my god the muscles in his forearms make my thighs go "wow those are some big muscles"....anyway he is an old Gorean, super hardcore, has meant it for years, has the whole sword collection on the wall thing going on, he used to be a wrestler some of you'd recognize his name, but now that hardbodies are the fad he just teaches...anyway he's always teased me cuz "Mic you let your women get away with murder"....and then the rants of a woman's place begins.  With my first wife this ussually ("usually") ended up with me hustling him out the door before the question was answered "who'd win? a salad shooter up the pooper or the wrestler"...  (I sense "cuckold" here).

but yesterday he and I were carrying stuff into the house, ok he was carrying I was more or less being a cheerleader, but at least I have the knees for it...and we get done and sit down at the computers so he can do his business, my wife comes home just a little bit later they say their hellos and I give up my computer so she can check her mail etc.  I get a look from my friend saying I shouldn't do things like that and have tesitcles.  So I sit on the floor and continue to train our puppy and ask her if she can make me tea and coffee, she gets up  from her CM mail and gets them...and my friend rushes me, picks me up and busts me right on the mouth (and you ain't lived til you been frenched by a 400lb summoan (Samoan) with pig bristles for chin whiskers) saying that I finnaly (finally) made it to "the club" of getting "my woman trained"...(I sense "cuckold" here).

After we dropped him off at the airport I thought about it, i never formally trained my wife (I don't think you need to...I think she knows the drill...see above "cuckold"), and everybody from her daddy to last husband would have agreed she coudln't be trained she serves cuz she enjoys the service (and me not bitching/moaning and doing the bart simpson "so thirrrrsssttyy" thing) and after some more thought, I figured out I would take coffee on demand over a blowjob anytime, sex is too easy to come by but a good cup of cofee (coffee) that's something you still write home about. 

(Indeed).

anyway just a slice of life, no need to tell me how stupid (in the countless ways) I am for thinking x, y, or z.  (Well, actually, I would...however, I haven't a clue what you're attempting to say, and considering the fact that you neither capitalize your sentences nor end your sentences in any kind of punctuation...I'll assume that you'll accept my periods and indents as provided) no need to write looking for an autograph from my friend (I actually wasn't considering the option), he's alreayd in costa rica on a recruiting tour and no need to write and ask me to make you a better cheerleader (I thought you wanted to be the cheerleader), it's in the knees, its natural or you cant' do it. :)

Or?

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 3:50:12 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Griswold, Kabuki is a highly stylized Japanese theatrical form. I'm not that familiar with the looks, but presumably huge mustaches are part of it.

And I don't see why the fact that his friend outweighs him and can outbench him makes him a cuckold. Care to elaborate on the causality of this?

(in reply to Griswold)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 4:43:41 PM   
Perplex


Posts: 110
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks Griswold, if you want I can talk to my publisher and see if they'll hire you on as an editor.  but really thank you  for taking the time to correct the spelling in my post, um of course they have trained monkeys and computer programs that will do the same thing.  Really you need to catch up to the date on the calendar, it's about talent  --ya know that basic stuff mommie and daddy couldn't get you no matter how much they saved to send you to a good school, not about tech. skill, cuz as I said there are now machines to do the same thing. 

and as far as the cuckold thing. *shrug* I knew how it'd make me look when I put it out there, since worrying about things like that is something I left behind with my short pants and GI Joe collection I'll leave to folks like you to fret over...and if you need three more inches of dick, I know a samoan who can lend you some....just he'll want you to wash it off when you're done admiring yourself in the mirror. 

point of reference, I go through about 3 editors a year..so far I'm up to 2 nervous breakdowns and one suicide attempt and six retirements.  something I take great pride in :)

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 8:09:05 PM   
Joseff


Posts: 505
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline 		This has been one of the most fun threads I've read. I don't have anything to add to it, however. I have enjoyed reading it, though.
Joseff

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 8:13:08 PM   
xoxi


Posts: 1066
Status: offline 		lolwut?

I'm not sure if I should be offering congratulations or condolences to the OP but whichever one suits...please consider them to be extended most sincerely on my behalf

(in reply to Joseff)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 8:50:19 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		Shoot..I dont know about the rest..but I just plain ol enjoyed the visual of this whole scenerio...And the Samoan friend a real hoot!..I visualized a great teddy of a man..rough, gruff outside ..and a marshmallow inside..(of course not someone you would peeve off either..:0)....but it would be kinda interesting to poke that old bear of a man ..just for curiosity sake....Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 8:59:48 PM   
Mercurialdame


Posts: 66
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline 		My first thought, is you are becoming aroused by your friend. Id not say gay. It could be a little one space he evokes in you. But you appear to be very attracted to him.
He is your friend, and is offering you pearls of wisdom. Tips on how to be a better husband. This does of course, imply, that he perceives you as needing to be changed.
Then he kisses you. A little risque? or purely innocent. Only you know the answer to this. If there was a kiss, of a intimate nature, then for fucks sake, go play with him, and come tell us, and show us the photos please!
Is anyone else's gaydar clanging?
Your friend is Master in his own house (your's too it appears). The man has attrocious manners. Unusually so for a Samoan. They are very family orientated. I dont know about Gorean. But anyhow, he has carefully selected a few, that have agreed to say he's got final say on EVERTHING to house share on his terms, as His slaves. If they dont cut it, he probably moves on to a better fit. You dont get to see his relationships issues, because he has created a world, where there will be none.
That self ingratiating thing you do? Stop that. Its detrimental to all. It has not one iota of benefit as far as i can tell, from the small glimpse of yourself that i see. Why do you really do that?
I have no idea how old you are, but im guessing not yet mature. And clearly inquisitive about learning. If not motivated yet. Not enough to put the time and effort it would clearly be, to 'train' your wife. If i were your wife, hearing that message, id certainly not be playing with you either. Not until you showed me some respect, and er, desire for me!
Us girls just love to be courted. Try it sometime.
Interesting that your Somoan friend felt it ok, to slap the back of your legs. I find that i too wish to behave like this toward you. In fact, that is what i have just done? What is it that you are putting out, that evokes this response in others?
Your not very honest with yourself are you. This also leads me to believe that you are young. That you dont truly know yourself yet. You are discovering what makes you tick, what doesnt. That suggests not yet mature.
nuff said.

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: wives vrs subs - 9/12/2007 10:47:26 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		A day in the life of Perplex & company. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your post.  Thanks for sharing it. I just feel all happy, happy, joy, joy.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 20
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