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Dom/Sub=Switch? - 9/12/2007 1:26:43 PM

redbeard71901

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Joined: 4/25/2007
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Given my past experience 18 yrs, I thought that I was a switch. Well a few years ago I found out different, I think I'm pussy whipped! LOL Let me explain and then maybe some of you can give me your unbias opinion, slander,namecalling, etc. Theres always one in the crowd. I was in a relationship for near 20 years, we took turns or at times I was the dominate back and forth between the 2 of us (her mostly dominate). Well a few yrs ago she came to me and told me that she was tired of being dominate, that if I wanted sex I would have to become more aggressive. Well I thought she was speaking in terms of bdsm, I had never been phyical with her in that way before. So when I brought out the flogger and cuffs all hell broke lose. She went to explain that aggressive ment to not give up when persueing. Hmmmmm, I was always tought "NO ment NO". So now that I'm single I have been persuing as strickly DOM, (not many women in my area that want a switch. But to get on with the question. I would have to gander that I'm only submissive and not dom by anymeans, yet I wouldn't think that I would want a woman telling me what to do. I want to be the one thats in control, but as I'm learning about Doms/Subs its a lifestyle not just a sexual way of being.

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RE: Dom/Sub=Switch? - 9/12/2007 1:33:19 PM

CuriousLord

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Joined: 4/3/2007
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The terms, "Dom" and "sub" are typically, in this community, used for lifestylers. Instead of "Dom", it's common to call an individual who's dominant in bed a "top" and the submissive in bed the "bottom".

A "switch" can be a lot of things, though some (particularly self-defined switches) may use a specific definition as the primary definition more often than not.
A switch could be..
-Someone who would be content being either a Dom or a sub in a particular relationship, often chosing which based on situation.
-Someone who, in a relationship, alternates between being a Dom or a sub.
-Someone who was once sub or Dom, then became a Dom or sub, respectively, later.
-Someone who is a Dom in the lifestyle and a bottom in bed, or a someone who is a sub in the lifestyle and a top in bed.

I suppose there's more definitions. I listed those three in order of prevalence as it seems to be to me, most common to least.

< Message edited by CuriousLord -- 9/12/2007 1:34:55 PM >

(in reply to redbeard71901)

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