Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Curtain Rods


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> Curtain Rods Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Curtain Rods - 9/17/2007 8:39:35 AM   
KenDckey


Posts: 4121
Joined: 5/31/2006
Status: offline






 

.ExternalClass .EC_shape{}

_filtered {}.ExternalClass EC_P.MsoNormal{font-size:12pt;font-family:'Times New Roman';}.ExternalClass EC_LI.MsoNormal{font-size:12pt;font-family:'Times New Roman';}.ExternalClass EC_DIV.MsoNormal{font-size:12pt;font-family:'Times New Roman';}.ExternalClass A:link{color:blue;text-decoration:underline;}.ExternalClass EC_SPAN.MsoHyperlink{color:blue;text-decoration:underline;}.ExternalClass A:visited{color:blue;text-decoration:underline;}.ExternalClass EC_SPAN.MsoHyperlinkFollowed{color:blue;text-decoration:underline;}.ExternalClass EC_P.MsoAutoSig{font-size:12pt;font-family:'Times New Roman';}.ExternalClass EC_LI.MsoAutoSig{font-size:12pt;font-family:'Times New Roman';}.ExternalClass EC_DIV.MsoAutoSig{font-size:12pt;font-family:'Times New Roman';}.ExternalClass EC_SPAN.EmailStyle17{font-weight:normal;color:black;font-style:normal;font-family:'Book Antiqua';text-decoration:none;}.ExternalClass EC_SPAN.SpellE{}.ExternalClass EC_SPAN.GramE{}.ExternalClass EC_DIV.Section1{}













CURTAIN RODS---- PRICELESS
She
spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
         

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
           
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.
           
     
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods.
            

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.
      
Then slowly, the house began to smell.
            

They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out.
                      

Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned.
                  

Air fresheners were hung everywhere.  Exterminators were brought in to set
off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in
the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked.
        

People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit.

 
                  

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. 

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could
not find a buyer for their stinky house.

     

Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return
their calls.
               

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase
a new place.
                   


The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going.
             

He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old  home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
          

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a
price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if
she were to sign the papers that very day.
             

She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.
               

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........
         
And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!!!!!!

                 
I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU?














 


 
 










Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/17/2007 9:15:44 AM   
favesclava


Posts: 1608
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline
yes. the stuff dreams are made off.

(in reply to KenDckey)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/17/2007 11:27:49 AM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
somehow I missed the humour of the story...oh well if there were any justice the ex wife will die a slow and embarassing death

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!


Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to favesclava)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/17/2007 5:38:09 PM   
LivingInSin


Posts: 326
Joined: 6/12/2007
Status: offline
I love it! I wonder if I could do anything like that.

_____________________________

*Instead of complaining that rose bushes have thorns, rejoice that thorn bushes bloom*

*Myth says that only the woman who has been an utter slave can be truly free------this is no myth*


(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/17/2007 7:59:26 PM   
mischievousone


Posts: 164
Joined: 8/15/2007
Status: offline
I'll need to remember that one!

(in reply to LivingInSin)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/18/2007 9:54:39 AM   
HypnoticDan


Posts: 463
Joined: 5/23/2007
Status: offline
Doesn't change the fact that the ex wife is alone now.  Maybe if she'd put as much thought into keeping him around they wouldn't have gone through all these games in the first place.

(in reply to mischievousone)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/18/2007 9:55:39 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
Yeah, I did the same to my old lady.

Lee Harvey Oswald

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to HypnoticDan)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/18/2007 10:42:09 AM   
VadFarkas


Posts: 923
Joined: 6/7/2007
Status: offline
I hid some sardines in a co-workers work area once... he never noticed but others did.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Curtain Rods - 9/19/2007 4:32:31 PM   
favesclava


Posts: 1608
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HypnoticDan

Doesn't change the fact that the ex wife is alone now.  Maybe if she'd put as much thought into keeping him around they wouldn't have gone through all these games in the first place.

sometimes you can do everything possible. look good, be better than a porn star and still get left for someone new. thats when revenge is sweet......................and mandatory

(in reply to HypnoticDan)
Profile   Post #: 9
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> Curtain Rods Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.063