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On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 10:22:39 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Ok I have just about got a sense of humour left. I apologise for thus ending a sentance with a preposition and I also apologiise if you didn't even notice. Actually I have been interviewing Dominants and it's made me feel like apologising for everything.
This has been a cross between Desperately Seeking Susan and Actively Seeking Work. Really, no really strange.
I'm not here looking for a Dominant because I am desperate. Actually i'm here because I am discerning. And my experience thus far?
Three doms stick in my mind (actually in my craw)....the first (you will know if it's YOU) called me after two days of emails. He was obviously stuck in a traffic jam whilst commuting, probably round the M25. He assumed owernership from that first phone call.. HARSH, DOUR AND TELLING ME WHAT TO DO WITH MY UNDERWEAR ALREADY.
THE SECOND i QUITE FANCIED, AS THERE WAS A PIC OF HIM ON THE BEACH. ok SO HIS WEBLOGS WERE WITTY IN THAT SEASIDE POSTCARD SORT OF WAY. hE SET ME A TASK TO WRITE AND CAPTURE HIS IMAGINATION BY WAY OF MY CREDENTIAL'S TEST. HE WANTED CLOTHES PEGS ON EACH NIPPLE AND FIVE CLOTHES PEGS ON EACH LABIA for the duration of its writing.....(NO OFFER TO STRETCH MY LABIA FIRST FOR ME FIRST)..Sorry  I'm not shouting just inadvertently put the caps lock on and therefore apologising yet again.
The third has had me on web cam....I admit I got my kit off but then he asked me to phone him. I had no credit on my mobile so he phoned me. However, to be told to keep talking because otherwise he might fall asleep, doesn't exactly imbue my heart with confidence. What can my words do if my naked body doesn't?
There is a certain air that they have seen it all before, or that they miss my finer points or that they skip the starters and the main course and go straight (or not so straight) for the pudding.
I have to laugh. Look! There's no d/s dynamic until we agree there is ok. I will woo you, court you, clean you, lick you, massage you, beg you, please you, serve you...I will I promise to do all that you ask...once we have a contract, or a job descrition, a set of rules, expectations roles and responsibilities.
Unless of course you simply happen to be Mr RIGHT.

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 10:30:26 AM   
AMaster


Posts: 814
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline 		It takes a while to find the right one.  Don't give up.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 10:41:12 AM   
Satyr6406


Posts: 820
Joined: 3/27/2006
From: New Brunswick, N.J.
Status: offline 		I would like to offer kudos to the OP.
 
Here is a lady that understands that "interviewing" (not my first choice of words but, each to their own) is what a submissive MUST do to find the proper dominant upon whom to bestow her surrender! I have been saying this same thing for YEARS!
 
Too often, the sexual attraction plays a hand into making a decision that should (IMO) be looked at as a LIFETIME commitment!
 
How many times have we seen threads, on here, that basically say: "My dominant didn't tell me that he would expect me to ..."? That's because they didn't take enough time to get to know the person that they have given themselves to (It also makes me question how much they value themselves). What is the rush? if you're horny, just fuck people and move on. If you're that lonely that you NEED someone in your life, look into some counselling (under "co-dependancy").
 
I have no clue why what seems like such a simple principle, so often, gets ignored.
 
 
 
 
 
Peace and comfort,
 
 
 
 
 
Michael

_____________________________

Peace and comfort,


Michael

Former Vice-President Gore didn't invent the internet but, he DID make up global warming!

(in reply to AMaster)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 10:46:51 AM   
lostkitty


Posts: 2
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline 		I have a hard time not laughing,  no not laughing at you but rather with you.  I have been messaged to from hundreds of Doms in all shapes n sizes. Its not any different than hunting for Mr Right in the vanilla world.  They are all so very different with different needs and different wants.  The biggest majority of them seeking nothing more than a quick fix via cam , phone or cyber. Many have heard from their male aquaintences that the word Dom or Master will get them a quick willing playmate. Yes theres some real ones out there. And some very good ones I might add. But its a hunt that could require a lifetime. Well if all a person wanted was sex I think thats a bit easier to find. However that ultimate partner in life, that best friend  who can meet your needs in the bedroom as well as out of it. Now thats a rare treasure. Whatever it is you seek, never sell yourself short. You deserve to get all that you wish for.

Wishing you much happiness and many smiles,  :)    Lost Kitty


(in reply to AMaster)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 10:52:35 AM   
SirCache


Posts: 159
Joined: 3/26/2005
Status: offline 		Wow... three examples of spectacular, there.  I always wonder what people are thinking sometimes, when they behave so... childishly?

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 11:26:38 AM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Satyr6406

I would like to offer kudos to the OP.
 
Here is a lady that understands that "interviewing" (not my first choice of words but, each to their own) is what a submissive MUST do to find the proper dominant upon whom to bestow her surrender! I have been saying this same thing for YEARS!
 
Too often, the sexual attraction plays a hand into making a decision that should (IMO) be looked at as a LIFETIME commitment!
 
How many times have we seen threads, on here, that basically say: "My dominant didn't tell me that he would expect me to ..."? That's because they didn't take enough time to get to know the person that they have given themselves to (It also makes me question how much they value themselves). What is the rush? if you're horny, just fuck people and move on. If you're that lonely that you NEED someone in your life, look into some counselling (under "co-dependancy").
 
I have no clue why what seems like such a simple principle, so often, gets ignored.
 
 
 
 
 
Peace and comfort,
 
 
 
 
 
Michael


I strongly agree with this message. There seems to be a natural or wanting to make online communication the same as getting to know someone in a bar or flirting at work but because of the life we are wanting and if distance or other hurdles are involved you can waste a lot of time if you are more interested in flirting, warming up to the person or other descriptions. Personally I think it was much more productive to discuss anything I could think of that could have major impact in a relationship upfront then to “naturally” try to build it up like you might in a face to face local situation.

I must say I had some like the OP wrote but cannot say I had three that lame. Too bad, give it time and if it continues then think about changing up your actions. Personally I found making them write for a little bit helped sort who was looking for some fun and who was serious and realistic. The less serious and sane did not want to put in the effort.



_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to Satyr6406)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 11:27:05 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Satyr6406


 
Here is a lady that understands that "interviewing" (not my first choice of words but, each to their own) is what a submissive MUST do to find the proper dominant upon whom to bestow her surrender! I have been saying this same thing for YEARS!
 



Thankyou Michael.
And here, (apologising yet again) are a few choice alternatives to what I might need to do to my prospective Dominant other than interview him:
ask, consult, converse, evaluate, examine, get opinion, hold inquiry, interrogate, question, quiz, sound out, talk, talk to argue, ask, brainstorm, call in, cogitate, collogue, commune, compare notes, confab, consider, debate, deliberate, discuss, examine, [/link][link=http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/groupthink]groupthink, [/link][link=http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/interrogate]interrogate, [/link][link=http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/negotiate]negotiate[/link][link=http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/powwow], question, refer to, regard, respect, review, seek advice, take counsel, talk over, treat, turn to ask questions, cross-examine, examine, gather intelligence, give the third degree, grill, interrogate, interview, investigate, probe, put through the wringer, quiz, work overcompose, deliver, draft, emit, formulate, give account, give forth, interview, orate, prepare draft, record, say, speak, talk, transmit, utter, verbalize..........lest he thinks that i cannot converse on the phone or that I lack a suitable width of vocabulary.It's not easy to be eloquent whilst holding the phone with one hand and doing something else with the other.
[link=http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/verbalize][/link]

(in reply to Satyr6406)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 11:38:30 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline 		What happened to the young man you were discussing a couple of days ago?


_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 11:53:52 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

What happened to the young man you were discussing a couple of days ago?



Dear Bobkgin
Thankyou for asking. As I said at the foot of the thread regarding him, he phoned to say he would be away for a long weekend and then only back in London Tuesday and Wednesday and then away again for two weeks. Fair enough  BUT he phoned out of the blue on Saturday morning and enquired whether or not I had scened with my girl.....she is new, very new and submissive to me and I really smelled a swinger. As I say in my profile I won't be used as fodder for other swine. I'm not a passport to females.
Swinging I believe is plar opposite to d.s relationship. The former is detached, voyeuristic in anture and defelective whilst the latter in supremely one to one, embodied and sensational.
I AM NOT SAYING BDSM EXCLUDES GROUP DYNAMICS, FAR FROM IT, BUT PLEASE LET ME ESTABLISH WE ARE D/S BEFORE EXPECTING ME TO INVITE TOM DICK HARRY AND SALLY.
So I may not respond to the invitation to meet.
Back to the drawing boards?


(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 12:05:56 PM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

What happened to the young man you were discussing a couple of days ago?



Dear Bobkgin
Thankyou for asking. As I said at the foot of the thread regarding him, he phoned to say he would be away for a long weekend and then only back in London Tuesday and Wednesday and then away again for two weeks. Fair enough  BUT he phoned out of the blue on Saturday morning and enquired whether or not I had scened with my girl.....she is new, very new and submissive to me and I really smelled a swinger. As I say in my profile I won't be used as fodder for other swine. I'm not a passport to females.
Swinging I believe is plar opposite to d.s relationship. The former is detached, voyeuristic in anture and defelective whilst the latter in supremely one to one, embodied and sensational.
I AM NOT SAYING BDSM EXCLUDES GROUP DYNAMICS, FAR FROM IT, BUT PLEASE LET ME ESTABLISH WE ARE D/S BEFORE EXPECTING ME TO INVITE TOM DICK HARRY AND SALLY.
So I may not respond to the invitation to meet.
Back to the drawing boards?




Oh poop! I hope not. You sounded ecstatic at the beginning (sorry I missed the end).

Not knowing what was said, I defer to your judgment.

But could it be possible he was just trying to share a happy moment with you, knowing the experience with the young lady would be new and hoping to hear your joy regarding the experience? Not in a salacious way, but in a partner kind of way?

Mind you, his schedule sucks.


_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 12:20:36 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin


Mind you, his schedule sucks.



A schedule that sucks now there's a thing......ahh the quiet cultural diferences within the English langusge. Yes his timetable is irksome I agree but perhaps that was also his way of forcing me to meet him.
I'll see....I'm not desperate nor am I in a hurry. I'm just not in chains either.........

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 12:45:45 PM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin


Mind you, his schedule sucks.



A schedule that sucks now there's a thing......ahh the quiet cultural diferences within the English langusge.
 

 
That would be early '70s suburban slang from Scarborough (the eastern suburb of Toronto, Canada).
 
I still use it on a regular basis with my friends from Scarborough, and from time to time I use it in my writing to add colour.


quote:
Yes his timetable is irksome I agree but perhaps that was also his way of forcing me to meet him.
I'll see....I'm not desperate nor am I in a hurry. I'm just not in chains either.........



Well then you are in luck.

There seems to be a software error, as all the new submissive British women are appearing on my Canada-only search list.

That should help focus more attention on you.



_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 1:18:03 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin


Well then you are in luck.

There seems to be a software error, as all the new submissive British women are appearing on my Canada-only search list.

That should help focus more attention on you.




Any chance there is of me appearing on a Canadian search engine isn't just luck....it's divine intervention....and Scarborough is a British seaside town up north....very declasse....kiss me quick hats and a quick snog round the back of the roller coaster. Just my cuppa tea....

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 1:39:34 PM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

Any chance there is of me appearing on a Canadian search engine isn't just luck....it's divine intervention....and Scarborough is a British seaside town up north....very declasse....kiss me quick hats and a quick snog round the back of the roller coaster. Just my cuppa tea....



I'm afraid my Scarborough is not as scenic.

It is a bedroom community of bungalows and apartment buildings, strip plazas and mega-malls. The beach front is almost entirely made of bluffs.

The park system is nice and extensive, however.

It's been thirty years since I hostelled my way through parts of England and Scotland. I imagine much has changed since then.


_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 2:37:51 PM   
Petronius


Posts: 289
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
Prinsexx has been running into what I call the "Pooh-Bah Doms" from the character of the same name in "The Mikado" by Gilbert and Sullivan.

In Act I he explains "I am, in point of fact, a particularly haughty and exclusive person, of pre-Adamite ancestral descent. You will understand this when I tell you that I can trace my ancestry back to a protoplasmal primordial atomic globule. Consequently, my family pride is something inconceivable. I can't help it. I was born sneering. But I struggle hard to overcome this defect. I mortify my pride continually."

Of course there's a key difference between the fictional character and the real Doms: Pooh-Bah, at least, said his pride was a character defect and stated he tried to modify it; the Pooh-Bah Doms do not.

P.

PS: Prinsexx wrote "I apologise for thus ending a sentance with a preposition...." English grammar has, thankfully, declined in recent decades. I believe it was Winston Churchill, no slouch as a writer, who supported this degradation, quipping "Split infinitives are one thing up with which I shall not put."

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: On interviewing Dominants - 9/17/2007 3:10:28 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Petronius

. I believe it was Winston Churchill, no slouch as a writer, who supported this degradation, quipping "Split infinitives are one thing up with which I shall not put."



"I can put uo on almost anything except a split infinity......forever is forever and these days and a one night stand is not an acceptable place to be put up in." Prinsexx 2007

PS Dear Petronius will you reveal yourself to me, please?

(in reply to Petronius)
Profile   Post #: 16
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