RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift?

RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (Full Version)

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perfection20005 -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/23/2005 5:10:21 AM)
I don't think my submission is a gift. Its just who I am, and I give it freely to my Master. perfection

perverseangelic -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/23/2005 8:43:30 AM)
No. I consider it apersonality trait.

pineapplesub -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/23/2005 9:14:21 PM)
I think of submission as a gift in some ways. As a gift is something that you don't have to give to someone, my submission is definitely a gift. I do not have to submit to any Dominant or male who claims to be Dominant. However, i believe that once you agree to turn the reins over... It ceases to be a gift, and instead becomes a steady exchange of needs and fulfillment between two people who complement each other. Also, i believe that once you agree to be someone's submissive/slave, you don't really have the right to simply 'stop because you don't want to do it today.' If there is abuse, yes... Hope that made sense. ~val~

imtempting -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/23/2005 9:39:14 PM)
Off Topic: I remember when I lost my virginity the next year the gal I lost it with I was only friends with and it was her birthday and I wanted to get something for my car but could either buy the car stuff or buy her a presant. So I said to her " I gave you my virginity which can never be taken back or lost and something that will never be forgetton" The look I got from her that day. It was terrible. She said to me "Its something that we both wanted so there is no way your using that as an excuse". I had to buy the presant. Thats how I look at beimg submissive...

Phoenixandnika -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/23/2005 10:59:11 PM)
My total submisison is a gift in my eyes and my Masters. Just as his dominace is a gift in my eyes. I am choosing to give something, something prescious. Myself, my body, my mind, my heart, my willingness to serve and obey. Does that come without a cost? Not by any means, however for me my Master was doing those things before I submitted. He was meeting my needs and protecting me that is why I feel to my knees and offered him my gift. He could have refused it. Stamped it return to sender or said it was something he couldnt accept. However, he did not. He holds it, protects it like that prescious family heir loom. He shows it off and he shines it keeping it clean. Think of it like this. For christmas you give your a child a puppy dog. It is a gift. Does it come with responsibility? Yes, it has needs that MUST be meet or it dies. Do they have to accept that responsiblity? No. Do they have to accept that dog? No. But if they do it does not take away from the fact that that dog was a gift, even when they are picking up the poop. laughs nika, Phoenix's deviant slave

junecleaver -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/24/2005 12:29:35 AM)
If it's a gift, I expect a thank you note 2-3 days after it's given.

Lordandmaster -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/24/2005 12:46:14 AM)
I think all this "gift" talk came from a time when it was still necessarily to explain to people that BDSM is not the same thing as abuse. In order to show that doms don't just abuse subs, but that it's all consensual etc., some people decided to characterize the whole interaction as a "gift" from the sub to the dom. This was a way of making sure that people didn't think a dom could just go ahead and do whatever he felt like doing to a sub. The underlying thinking is related to that of "safe/sane/consensual" (another shibboleth that annoys me to no end), which is obviously designed to parry the charge that BDSM is unsafe, insane, and non-consensual--in other words, that it's just abuse and only sickos would go for it. I'd like to think we're past that stage now, and we can get to the scarier realities. Submission isn't a "gift." It's who you are.

pinkpleasures -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/24/2005 7:21:44 AM)
i wasn't here for the "Bad Times" Lam describes. i would never tell my family about D/s because it would cause an unnecessary uproar and frankly, it's just too much information about my personal life. The gift/not gift question seems to me to be a debate without any "meat" on it. i am not a gift...i cannot sign up for slavery. My love and trust and submission are not (in my mind) "gifts" -- they are emotions and their expressions are hopefully met with reciprocity of dominance, love and care. On the other hand; if the next couple wants/needs the gift metaphor, they should feel free to use it. No one is right or wrong; it seems to me it comes down to personal choice. If using a "gift" metaphor helps you communicate or otherwise pleases you, by all means, feel free to use it. If not, don't. What someone else chooses to use to communcate does not -- could not -- affect me so what right do i have to criticise anyone else? pinkpleasures

wolfsprincess -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/24/2005 8:09:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: plantlady64 So now I'm wondering how many people feel to submit is a gift, and if it's not considered to be a gift, what your idea of the act of submission means to you? Sincerely, sub suzanne i don't see my submission as a "gift" at all. If i did, then when i submitted to my Master, i would have expected nothing in return. i submitted to Him because of MY needs and MY wants. i asked for His Mastery in return. To me, it's no more a gift than my employment is to my employer. i was hired for a job - i went to them with my resume in hand. i fit what they needed and i needed what they offered. i accepted the job knowing full well what was expected of me and in return, i receive a paycheck, benefits, etc. princess "...slave isn't just a word - it's who and what i am ... walking forever in His light and seeking shelter in His shadow" http://absoluteslavery.com http://absoluteslavery.com/secure/forum/

sultryvoice -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/25/2005 7:27:09 AM)
I don't consider my submission a gift at all. I know my nature and I am looking for the best possible match as I would in the vanilla world. I am who I am and whatever is accepted is just me. I am not sure where it started as calling submission a "gift", but I am not giving anything, I am being myself. Remember, it's all earned and I know I am not the only one who feels that way. I do respect how each see it but this is just my way. Respectfully, sultry

comesoncommand -> RE: Do you consider your submission to someone a gift? (7/25/2005 10:34:23 PM)
i absolutely see my submission as a gift. It isn't about my needs, my wants, my desires. my Master has already been made aware of those, and i trust Him to take care of me (and the above) as He sees fit. The amazing thing that many people don't realize is that by giving submission as a gift...truly giving of yourself you open up yourself to make His needs yours. When your purpose becomes to serve Him in such a way that He doesn't have to worry about being taken care of....He is freed. And what is He able to do with the freedom of not having to worry about His needs being met? He is able to concentrate on the care of His property...His slave. Yes, i agree with the woman (or women?) who said it is a symbiotic relationship. And for many it stays on a level of "i give so i can receive". To me that exists in the vanilla world. i desire a relationship (and am blessed with One) that transcends the vanilla realm into the lifestyle. my Master and i have had many discussions on viewing (or not) submission and/or Dominance as a gift. He relates D/s relationship to that of a relationship between a parent and child. Does a parent give things to a child and expect things in return? Perhaps common respect, manners, values, etc are expected to be displayed by a child. But if the child doesn't return the things that are perhaps expected, is all then taken away? If a child is disrespectful is then food and shelter taken away? Does a child give expecting something in return? i don't think that is the way in which children relate to their parents. you might view your own childhood lately, but if you've spent time with a small child lately and viewed the world through their eyes i think you may agree with me. He also sees a Master's responsibilities in the same realm of a parents...to ensure all basic comforts (food, shelter, clothing, etc) are provided for, to truly help one learn and grow as a person. i will admit that there seem to be many Dominants out there that don't seem to be true Masters. They don't seem to embrace that level of responsibility along with their "Dominance" and all the things their submissives give/share. How horribly frustrating to give so much of yourself to another and never receive anything back, or feel valued or appreciated. In those cases i can understand why one would give of their submission only to receive Another's dominance. But when you are able to serve a true Master who cares for their slave as a parent would to a child, i truly offer the idea of submission as a gift to submissives reading this. Give in the same intent that people give truly anonymous gifts of clothing and food to poor families during the holidays. If you've never felt the rush of leaving a large bag of food or clothes on the doorstep of a family that has nothing...for them to find in the morning but never be aware of its origination, then you are certainly missing out on one of life's more pleasing sensations. Give as much as you would want another to give to you, while expecting nothing in return except the joy of giving. The results may amaze you.

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