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Cybersex...yawn - 7/23/2005 10:48:48 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
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Is there anyone else out there as disinterested in cybersex as I am? There was one person I really enjoyed doing it with...a lot...but she was someone with whom I was having a real relationship, and we had actually been together and had sex. With others it just seems...I dunno...feigned? There have been a few (very few) exceptions, but most of the times have just not done a whole hell of a lot for me. So, you might ask, why do I do it? Well, I don't anymore and when I did, I was never the one who initiated it...except with that aformentioned particular person.

I'm not putting the knock on those who do it and enjoy it; just wondering how many of you might feel as I do.

Bob

ps: Don't forget National Daisy Day...July 27th! See my 'Off Topic' post for more info.

< Message edited by DesertRat -- 7/23/2005 10:50:51 PM >

Post #: 1

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/23/2005 10:55:27 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

*waves*
Me too! Me too!

I admit, I got a kick out of it at first--as in, before I went realtime at all. Now...well...I'd rather have erotica, if I'm going to do anything like that, as erotica doesn't require any work.

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Post #: 2

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 1:54:45 AM

MadameDahlia

Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline

I find it amusing... but only in a rather warped way. I play the most unsexy Dom or Domme I can think of - thereby quickly killing the conversation when someone initiates cybersex. I find it entertaining to see how many posts it takes before they leave in an irate huff.

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(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 3

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 2:59:03 AM

fp2012

Posts: 97
Joined: 6/23/2005
Status: offline

I'm going to post this link in the humor section too, but it's so fitting here:
http://www.office-humour.co.uk/item.cfm?itm=1741

This is some guy who's pranking these girls into starting a cybersex conversation with him, then making it as unsexy/weird/random as possible. Sometimes it amazes me how long the girls will continue chatting before they get pissed off. I nearly peed laughing while reading it. Check it out

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Post #: 4

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 4:43:23 AM

ElektraUkM

Posts: 309
Joined: 2/19/2005
Status: offline

Hmmm.... well it depends what you're doing when you're doing 'Cybersex'.

Are you online typing about what you're not actually doing?
Are you on the phone, listening to someone describe something they're not doing?
Are you on the phone, listening to someone describe what they are doing?
Are you online describing sexual things you enjoy?
Are you on the phone, talking to someone you have a connection with, about sexual things you enjoy?

Some of these can feel hot, some of them can just feel stupid.
Would anyone want to spend their entire 'sex life' doing any of them and nothing else..? Doubtful!

~ Elektra

(in reply to fp2012)

Post #: 5

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 6:22:35 AM

caitlyn

Posts: 3473
Joined: 12/22/2004
Status: offline

No offense intended of course, but what really seems strange to me is being disinterested enough in cyber sex to not enjoy it, but interested enough in it to write about not enjoying it.

I like expensive dinners and I like McDonalds. I like expensive dinners more than McDonalds ... but I still eat McDonalds. If I could eat expensive dinners all the time, I might just do that ... but somehow I doubt it. Neither would I eat McDonalds all the time either. OK, maybe the fries and those little .99 cent spicy chicken sammys. ;-)

caitlyn

(in reply to ElektraUkM)

Post #: 6

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 4:59:01 PM

Vancouver_cinful

Posts: 1911
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline

Nope, don't do it, never have. Haven't really ever had the slightest interest in it. The few who have tried to engage me usually find it just makes me laugh.

Not that I think there's anything wrong in people enjoying it, but it just doesn't seem to flip any of my switches. I much prefer to write and read erotica, or flirt. A good subtle flirt that doesn't quite go over the figurative cybersex line can be quite delicious.

On the other hand, my ex enjoyed the odd cybersex conversation online and since we had an open relationship I never had an issue with him engaging it in...I usually reaped the benefits of his hobby afterwards, when he came to bed. ::grin::

Cin

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RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 5:19:06 PM

Isolde

Posts: 213
Joined: 4/18/2005
From: Hamilton, Ontario
Status: offline

I enjoy erotic activities. Cyber can be very arousing if it's with someone I share a connection with. It's interactive erotica at its finest, pure mental stimulation that translates into the physical. I have also at various times enjoyed reading erotica, writing erotica, watching porn, having sex after reading or writing erotica, having sex during porn, having sex over the phone, having sex without the aid of computer or phone or TV... erotic is erotic, it doesn't come in just one flavor.

Of course, having said that, if you were to take away the connection that allows me to enjoy cyber with someone, it can be boring or downright painful, particularly if the person on the other end doesn't have the sort of skill with writing that I prefer. I can't imagine interacting with someone just to get your virtual toes curled. On the other hand, I do know that there are people out there who enjoy that. To each their own. :)

(in reply to Vancouver_cinful)

Post #: 8

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 5:54:36 PM

sub4hire

Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I've always found it quite boring myself. However, as someone searching for a dom I wanted some cybersex to get a true idea of their fantasies.

It helps to get to the soul of a person much faster.

(in reply to DesertRat)

Post #: 9

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 6:08:02 PM

EmeraldSlave2

Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Well it's rare, but sometimes I find it exciting, just like sometimes I like perusing websites for stories to get off to.

(in reply to DesertRat)

Post #: 10

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 8:07:50 PM

SirSofaSpud

Posts: 7
Joined: 7/15/2005
Status: offline

my reaction to this topic is the same reaction i have to people who say then don't enjoy sex. that is, they must be doing it wrong and/or with the wrong people. i don't see much not to like. i agree with isolde when she said it's the finest in interactive erotica. granted, if you are talking to one who is either language or imagination challenged it can be boring as hell. but if you find someone whose only interested is in turning you on, getting into your head and imagination and playing there, and has the language skills to carry it off, what's not to like? i do realize this is only my view. not everyone dances to the same drummers. i just happen to be fond of this particular drum.

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)

Post #: 11

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 8:13:30 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
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I used to enjoy it a lot, it's how i learned about bdsm and it was my first training as a sub. Now that i am getting what i need with Hubby i have no use for it. With the right person who was very explicit, and with a good imagination i found it very arousing. Sometimes it was all fantasy, other times we acted out what we typed. Occasionally we included cams.

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proudsub

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(in reply to DesertRat)

Post #: 12

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 8:19:48 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

Well it's rare, but sometimes I find it exciting, just like sometimes I like perusing websites for stories to get off to.

Pretty much where I am, too. I'm not saying I'll never do it again. That would be dumb.

Great responses, all. Just what I was looking for. A reminder: not looking for...or making any personal judgements. Just wanting to see how others feel. Polling, as it were.

cheers.................Bob

Reminder: Tomorrow is Monday, then two days after that will be the time to celebrate the day Daisy the cat relocated from the alley and joined my little family. Daisy Day! July 27th.

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)

Post #: 13

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 8:54:15 PM

SirKenin

Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline

My confession is that I do not even know how to have cybersex, so I do not know if there is anything to be gained from it or not.

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(in reply to DesertRat)

Post #: 14

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/24/2005 9:00:04 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirKenin

My confession is that I do not even know how to have cybersex, so I do not know if there is anything to be gained from it or not.

Would you like to know more about it? You can email me, if you want.

Bob

(in reply to SirKenin)

Post #: 15

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/25/2005 9:32:13 AM

COYoungDom

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/24/2005
From: Westminster, CO
Status: offline

I must say I'm an avid cybersexoholic. I've been cybering for the passed couple of years and i find it exciting and arousing. Honestly its all that i have until people start taking me more seriously and take me for who i am and not who they bloody well want me to be. I frequently cyber with my two girl friends(not girlfriends) we have alot of fun and we really get off on it. we're hoping to start initiating cam once they both get cams and see how that goes.

But honestly, most people who can have sex in person and all isn't really going to be turned on by cyber or anything. I'm not knocking anyone off, but some of us who cyber is really all have right now. We'd love to have sex off the internet but once that pretty much has failed to a point we start thinking...."there must be another way". I don't know how many of you look for a guy or a girl who has an athletic body figure. I am far from an athletic. I'm a semi big guy around the block, standing 6'4 and around 300 pounds. Society these days has a offset that if you are young and you look a certain way and you are looking at someone young like you and you look the why i do and she is a skinny 120 health female...what are the odds of you being able to go home with that woman, if all she looks at is your looks and age and is completely turned off it. I look for more older women because i get a much better response...not always a really great one but they tend to see me more for who i am and for how i am. Then of course it gets to a point where they are too old and you are too young to their standards and you are back at square one again.

(in reply to DesertRat)

Post #: 16

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/25/2005 9:42:47 AM

Youtalkingtome

Posts: 112
Joined: 12/8/2004
Status: offline

I have never been interested in cybersex at all.

(in reply to DesertRat)

Post #: 17

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/25/2005 9:52:26 AM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: COYoungDom

I must say I'm an avid cybersexoholic. I've been cybering for the passed couple of years and i find it exciting and arousing. Honestly its all that i have until people start taking me more seriously and take me for who i am and not who they bloody well want me to be. I frequently cyber with my two girl friends(not girlfriends) we have alot of fun and we really get off on it. we're hoping to start initiating cam once they both get cams and see how that goes.

But honestly, most people who can have sex in person and all isn't really going to be turned on by cyber or anything. I'm not knocking anyone off, but some of us who cyber is really all have right now. We'd love to have sex off the internet but once that pretty much has failed to a point we start thinking...."there must be another way". I don't know how many of you look for a guy or a girl who has an athletic body figure. I am far from an athletic. I'm a semi big guy around the block, standing 6'4 and around 300 pounds. Society these days has a offset that if you are young and you look a certain way and you are looking at someone young like you and you look the why i do and she is a skinny 120 health female...what are the odds of you being able to go home with that woman, if all she looks at is your looks and age and is completely turned off it. I look for more older women because i get a much better response...not always a really great one but they tend to see me more for who i am and for how i am. Then of course it gets to a point where they are too old and you are too young to their standards and you are back at square one again.

Just make sure you don't completely ignore the real life side of dating and courting women because you've gotten used to cybersex and it's a good outlet. You'll build up a huge idealistic sexual fantasy life and it will be hard to live up to. Worse, you'll lack experience with women in real life and find yourself a virgin at 26 who has never had a real, long term relationship.

Akasha

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(in reply to COYoungDom)

Post #: 18

RE: Cybersex...yawn - 7/25/2005 10:01:37 AM

COYoungDom

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/24/2005
From: Westminster, CO
Status: offline

If i end up a virgin still 8 years from now i don't know what i'd do. I've tried so many things and its pretty much hasn't worked yet. I'm a nice guy and all, great personality and all that. Its hard finding someone with similar interests and energies that will accept you. In alot of people i have found that have that, alot of them are older than me and now it brings in the age issue and me being 18 well that just screws me over pretty much 75% of the time. Its not that I'm not trying just the fact I'm never given the time of day.

(in reply to AAkasha)

Post #: 19

a partial recantation...sheesh! - 7/25/2005 10:30:42 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline

Is this one of those synchronicity-type things? I met someone yesterday and after some good long chats, we are in the very early preliminary stages of possibly, maybe "considering" each other. Did I throw enough qualifiers in there? Anyway, at the end of our chat this evening, something really really NICE happened. Something I enjoyed very much with her. This has caused me to soften my stance on cybersex. Gee, not sure "soften" is the word I wanna use there. No...definitely the wrong word. But you get my drift, don't you? Maybe there is a god and He/She/They/It wants me to enjoy cybersex?

So I am partially recanting my original testimony. No big deal...I wasn't under oath or Mirandized or any of that stuff. I still am enjoying reading your views on cybersex.

Bob

ps: Don't forget National Daisy Day...July 27th! See my 'Off Topic' post for more info.

(in reply to COYoungDom)

Post #: 20

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