Submission a Gift

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Submission a Gift

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Submission a Gift

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 3:32:54 PM

MstrHellsFury

Posts: 388
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

can someone please explain to me...and I'm serious about this question because there must be a good answer to it...why do so many submissives consider giving their objectivity of being to another some sort of gift...I know I don't think being a dominant a gift to give...can I get a little help on this one...

Fury

Post #: 1

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 3:44:03 PM

oceanprincess

Posts: 42
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

It's a gift that you are giving yo a Dom because you are giving them, YOU. You are letting them control you, you are letting them mold you, help you be a better person. For a person, human being to be able to control someone else's life, that's a gift. Just like if you had a child, that's a gift, because you get to mold them, teach them things that they will only learn from their parents, and they are a part of you.

I don't know how else to explain it...

oceanprincess

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 2

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 3:48:57 PM

greenie

Posts: 579
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline

when I think of a gift I'm not necessarily a physical object. For instance I see me children as a gift, or my friends, or other loved ones. They have enhanced my life. I don't think it's always meant in the sense that people are saying that you should feel lucky that they submit to you as much as they mean that your life is enhanced by them submitting to you. It's too easy to try and see everything as clearcut with an exact definition. I've noticed that alot on the posting that I've read, and this is just my first day reading the posts. So I would ask yourself this...Is your life better for what they bring to you? If the answer is yes then I would say that's a gift, just as I'm sure they feel you are a gift to them.

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 3

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 3:49:30 PM

Vixen81

Posts: 10
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline

I personally think its a load of crap. I think that submissives who see the fact that they are yielding to His power is a GIFT is full of themselves.
Cheers.

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 4

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 3:51:02 PM

darkinshadows

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

Gift or not

Do you consider .... a gift?

On the gift of submission

If you click the search icon on the top of the page and enter the word your after, like 'Gift' - it offers lots of posts on the subject = I hope this assists.

To me, submission nor domination are gifts.

Peace and Love

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 5

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 4:11:24 PM

greenie

Posts: 579
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline

I would never egotistically consider myself a gift to someone! If someone views either me or what I bring to the table a gift then wow! ty so much! I just feel that those people who are treasured by me are gifts. I am offended when subs/slaves say "my Master should be grateful for me". Check that ego lol. Or I have even heard it the other way around where a Dom thinks he or she is a gift to the sub/slave for what they do for their sub/slave. I would have to say that I wouldn't be with someone who didn't appreciate me and all that I offer, but that's not the same as a gift. Maybe it depends if you're religious or not. Christians for example believe that all things are a gift from God so for a Christian Dom he might think that his sub/slave is a gift. So what it may all come down to is a gift is in the eye of the beholder or something like that. Again, there is no clear definition on what people here consider a gift so it is however you view it.

(in reply to darkinshadows)

Post #: 6

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 7:00:32 PM

perfection20005

Posts: 419
Joined: 4/20/2005
Status: offline

I think this has been asked and answered many times already. And I do think some Doms/Masters believe they are God! I myself don't conside either one to be a gift.

perfection

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 7

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 10:07:34 PM

SherriA

Posts: 544
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

If it's a gift, can I get a gift receipt for return/exchange purposes please?

_____________________________

-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 8

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 10:27:35 PM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

Sorry, all sales are final. If you want to exchange, you will have to start over.

(Hey, welcome back

The balloons are gone! )

(in reply to SherriA)

Post #: 9

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 10:44:42 PM

junecleaver

Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline

"Yeah it's a gift. Where's my thank you card, bitch?"

I think the gift mentality undermines the power dynamic. It's just a fluffy, romantic sentiment.

(in reply to onceburned)

Post #: 10

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 11:41:26 PM

Padriag

Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrHellsFury

can someone please explain to me...and I'm serious about this question because there must be a good answer to it...why do so many submissives consider giving their objectivity of being to another some sort of gift...I know I don't think being a dominant a gift to give...can I get a little help on this one...

Fury

Take your pick from the following possible answers...

Because they read that's what it was on CastleRealm and therefore it must be true.
Because they've heard other "subs" chanting the mantra in chatrooms, therefore it must be true.
Because the idea of giving themselves as gift to their dominant appeals to the mentality of many submissives.
Because its a highly romanticized idea that appeals to the romantic elements of their nature.
Because they heard it somewhere, it sounded good and they never considered any other way of looking at it.

The idea is very widespread, particularly on the internet. Its not surprising you can't swing a single tail in a chat room without hitting a sub who fervently believes in the concept. In fairness, the concept works for many people and doesn't get in the way of their going on to have wonderful relationships. But for some of us, myself included, its not a "metaphor" that appeals to us.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 11

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/24/2005 11:44:37 PM

cravessubmission

Posts: 4
Joined: 3/23/2005
Status: offline

I am a submissive, I have a need to submit.. It is not a desire or a want, but an actual need I have inside me..

I do NOT consider submission as a gift, a dominant has a need to dominate and to me the two together fulfill each others needs..

To me the gift comes from the joining of the Dom/sub, Master/slave in this very special bond that only they can understand..

Just my opinion...

(in reply to junecleaver)

Post #: 12

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 12:08:30 AM

manoffire

Posts: 1
Joined: 4/22/2005
Status: offline

well, from a guys point of view, it is at least valuable. i mean, there's about 3 women on this site and about 2394823948712394872934871290348712039487 guys. so...

at the very least you are lucky if you get a sub.

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 13

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 4:43:54 AM

zaynab

Posts: 377
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

me being a sub is just the way i've always been and the way i am... i can't relate to my submissiveness ever being a "gift".

maybe there are some subs out there who aren't always submissive naturally, and they become that way by choice at various times, like turning it on and off? if that's the case... they may view it as a 'gift' when they submit to a Dom?

just a thought... ~ zay

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 14

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 9:36:38 AM

Kiaban

Posts: 124
Joined: 7/11/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: junecleaver

"Yeah it's a gift. Where's my thank you card, bitch?"

I think the gift mentality undermines the power dynamic. It's just a fluffy, romantic sentiment.

simply priceless! *smiles*

(in reply to junecleaver)

Post #: 15

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 12:25:01 PM

LittleMissSub

Posts: 46
Joined: 2/23/2005
Status: offline

Hmmm...

I am one of those who considers submission a gift to the one who's receiving it.

I didn't learn this concept by reading websites, looking at other profiles or chatrooms. This is how I feel, and am surprised that this concept is so widespread.

I have a genuine need within me to submit to another. This need is incredably strong within me, and I feel like a part of me is missing expression and fulfillment when I can't do this.

I've learned over the last year of getting into this lifestyle (in a real, not internet kind of way) that I can't submit to just anyone. As strong as that desire was within me, sometimes, I just could not do it. Some people are not worthy of my submission, for whatever reasons. I place a high value on my submission. It's not that that reinforces my ego, but I put a lot of work into letting go of the psychological trappings that hold it back. I see it as a gift to give someone who is worthy of receiving it. Much like a Dom may give his sub a collar to wear, once he is sure that she is worthy of wearing it. Once I get to know a man, and know he is the one I want, I lay my submission before him and offer my true self, something which not many people get to see.

Perhaps, I'm not looking at things in the same light others do. Who knows, that's just how I see things through my own perspectives. Maybe I look at it that way to maintain some sort of control. Who knows. I'm one of those who thinks that though a sub gives up a lot, ultimately they have just as much control, just not as many options. The sub doesn't have to go with the Dom if they choose not to. A safeword, called reasonably will end a scene. Limits are respected.

Anyways, this has given me something to think about - Thanks!

(in reply to Kiaban)

Post #: 16

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 1:11:22 PM

MstrHellsFury

Posts: 388
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

for all who have responded I thank you ..I also look forward to seeing more posts on this subject...I really didn't want to go to other sites or posts to find answers...I wanted real time as of now answers...this I have recieved...again thank you all...

Fury

(in reply to LittleMissSub)

Post #: 17

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 1:54:29 PM

MsIncognito

Posts: 742
Joined: 5/24/2005
Status: offline

A gift is something I give with no expectation of getting anything in return. I don't give submission as a gift because, damnit, I expect dominance in return. It's an exchange on both sides, not a gift given with no expectation of getting something just as valuable (to me) in return.

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 18

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 2:04:29 PM

pinkpleasures

Posts: 1114
Status: offline

i cannot relate to the vision of myself as a gift to my One...but i am not invested in the language/methaphors/nuances/dynamics of A/anyone else's relationship as to the use or not of the "gift" methaphor. i have prayed a long time to God for a Dom or Master who can fulfill my wants/needs, so if i found my One, it would be a blessing..and i would thank God for it..for Him. He might possibly feel the same way about me...but He might have only searched a brief time and not have the same sense of wonder at finding me. Who knows? In any event, the clasp of the collar round my neck is a blessed event.....but tis not a gift of Me...tis an answered prayer, perhaps.

pinkpleasures

_____________________________

(in reply to MstrHellsFury)

Post #: 19

RE: Submission a Gift - 7/25/2005 11:18:52 PM

junecleaver

Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

simply priceless! *smiles*

(in reply to pinkpleasures)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Submission a Gift

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.061