Bobkgin
Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
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ORIGINAL: chickpea
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ORIGINAL: xoxi
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ORIGINAL: Bobkgin
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ORIGINAL: laurell3
obviously physical attraction is very much a part of any initial getting together.
l
Not when what you are seeking is under the skin ... like a heart of gold.
I have to disagree with that...a heart of gold can't replace physical attraction completely just as physical attraction can't replace emotional compatibility. They're two separate requirements and I think both are important for an intimate relationship.
Obviously emotional attraction tends to make someone *more* physically attractive because you see them as a sexual partner, but everyone has their limits as far as this goes. The line may vary depending on the individual (and usually on how attractive the individual judging is) but there is definitely a line where no amount of emotional compatibility can turn the relationship into anything more than a friendship.
Besides...sex is important in a healthy relationship. Kinda hard to have a healthy sex life if both your bits are covered by 500 lb rolls 
I thought this at first, but as long as he's healthy and can satisfy me etc... has a great personality, respects me, is sensitive to my needs etc etc etc you know... then who cares. I think physical attraction is good for the "opening the door" and inital interest if you're in a horny mood (lol), but I think that personality and person-himself, integrity, and character (not lying, etc..) etc.. will carry the relationship forward all the way down the road to bigger and better. I've met so many Hot Idiots. It's disgusting. It's like looking a beautiful statue and discovering that it's a plastic fake that was made in china and is full of holes inside...worthless. The hot and bodies are all just to cover an idiot inside. It makes it even more repulsive that he's hot, and completely disgusts me personality-wise. I am big on the inner-person. That's what I feed off of. I think initial lust is all physical, like flipping through pages of a gossip magazine or eating candy. Candy is just a quick-sugar fix that doesn't last long and makes you sick and bloated later, if there's no substance to it.
I cannot be in a shallow relationship for long, it is not the way I'm built. Even if this guy were a billionaire or whatever, I'd say see ya and bye. I know, i know, I'd get ahead more in life, but that's just not who I am. I'm not built to be that way. What really gets me is a great guy. Scarey, how it is... but building a great life together is such a great high, and you can't do that with a hot-looking idiot (or not so hot-looking idiot).. you know what I'm talking about....is so much better than working off of just initial physical attraction forever, which I'm sure lots of people try to do.
Oh, and guys who aren't that attractive but then have a bitter attitude about hot guys or I'm all that just because I want to force the fact that I think I'm great for no reason just because, gimme a break...that's disgusting too. I don't know maybe guys are different. They're built to build relationships on the physical attraction (you know the darwinian propogate their genes and seek the healthiest looking person), but I don't see how they would just need physical unless all they need is a trophy wife or the short-term sex.
Okay, I've beaten this topic to death..lol
I think you expanded on my point quite well.
My impression of beautiful women is that they have had quite a bit handed to them simply because of their looks.
Those who are less-beautiful have had to develop personality traits to compensate for what they were not getting due to looks.
While some can be bitter, I've found far more hearts of gold within the less-beautiful than in the beautiful.
Not that the beautiful can't have hearts of gold. I'm sure some do. But I've found a much higher percentage of 'plain janes' with beautiful personalities than I am ever going to find amongst the "beautiful people".
Caveat: I am not your typical male, lusting after a gorgeous body. I want the heart and mind of someone who has learned what matters most, and what lasts longest, is who we are inside, not what we look like.
_____________________________
When all is said and done, what will you regret?
That you never really lived?
Or there was so much living left to do?
For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.
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RE: Difficulty finding a Dom? - 
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