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Top ten signs you're a Christian Fundy - 7/25/2005 11:38:48 PM   
teapaw


Posts: 97
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*TOP TEN SIGNS YOU ARE A CHRISTIAN FUNDY*
10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of other gods
claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence
of your god.
9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from lower life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.
8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in three gods- the trinity.> 7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" --including women, children, and trees!
6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that some spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.
5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (4.55 billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a couple of generations old.
4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs --though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."
3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.
2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.


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RE: Top ten signs you're a Christian Fundy - 7/25/2005 11:44:58 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
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I know one of those ...
quote:

ORIGINAL: teapaw

*TOP TEN SIGNS YOU ARE A CHRISTIAN FUNDY*
5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (4.55 billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a couple of generations old.
4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs --though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.



And those three points right there are why he decided to tell me (while we were at work - he was a CNA as the nursing home that I worked at briefly earlier this year) that I was going to burn in hell, he called me a fat bitch, and started shouting at me to get the fuck out of his face. Of course, the fact that he had cheated on his wife wasn't a problem for him, but the fact that I knew some of the history of Christianity and the time period that isn't in the Bible was a huge problem. *rolls eyes* perhaps I should forward that to him.

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RE: Top ten signs you're a Christian Fundy - 7/26/2005 12:15:13 AM   
teapaw


Posts: 97
Joined: 5/5/2005
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I would LOL...
pamela

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"get a taste of reiligion ...lick a witch"

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RE: Top ten signs you're a Christian Fundy - 7/26/2005 4:44:25 PM   
fourpeas


Posts: 243
Joined: 5/6/2005
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Aggggghhhhh

As a religious person and also a Religion scholar (with a degree) I get so annoyed when people don't read the Bible. JEEZ! It's right there!!!! Read it!

my new motto is :

EDUCATE YOURSELF

ha ha... liked the one about the people coming from dirt... that's funny

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