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do i contact him - 10/6/2007 7:23:46 AM

Dublingirl38

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline

Hi all. I recently met and played with a Dom for the weekend, do i wait until he contacts me again or will i appear all needy if i am totally available to Him? when he stayed for the weekend he slept in the spare bedroom for both nights which i think is a tad weird.. is that normal also?

Post #: 1

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 8:33:33 AM

JasonF

Posts: 61
Joined: 5/30/2005
Status: offline

I wouldn't worry about it that much. Do what feels natural to you. If he doesn't like the "natural" way you do things, then he either has to be willing to change it or deal with it if a relationship would work, anyway.

_____________________________

Jay
TNG-NC Council Member
engaged to my girl, junecleaver

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 2

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 8:39:15 AM

swtnsparkling

Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I wouldn't contact him.

Sleeping in the other bedroom?- I bet he doesn't want you
thinking there is a relationship between you two other than him useing you when
it suits.

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 3

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 8:40:38 AM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

I would not contact him. It sounds strange that he was with you the entire weekend and slept in the guest room whilst still playing with you. Sounds as if he only wants casual.

(in reply to swtnsparkling)

Post #: 4

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 8:44:36 AM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

you dont know and we dont know....so maybe just ask him where hes at with you, with play, with relationships.

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

(in reply to swtnsparkling)

Post #: 5

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 8:53:56 AM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Hello DublinGirl!
**waving across the Atlantic Ocean**
We don't know that much background information here.
How long have you known him?
How well do you know him?
What has he said to you?
Etc.
You are a big girl now, all grown up and you trusted him enough to play
with him, AND let him sleep in your home!
You have every right to call him, tell him you enjoyed "playing" with him,
and you want to know what if any his intentions are as far as you are concerned.
Now, after you talk to him, you MUST come back and tell us what he says!

< Message edited by MzMia -- 10/6/2007 8:57:29 AM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 6

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 9:14:42 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

if it were me i would send him one email, not too long, not too short, and thats all...open the lines of communication in a non-obtrustive way and let him respond in his own time, and if he does not respond let it go....calling is not the best way because it could be at a bad time and if he doesn't recognize your number, he may not call back or whatever...texting is lame out of an established relationship, romantic or friendship....

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 7

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 11:48:16 AM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

There's no wrong or right decission to make here. You just have to go with your gut feeling on this one. However, I do dectect that you would really like another weekend with him.

If you are going to contact him, keep it simple.

Example:

"Hi, I enjoyed the weekend. Let me know when you would like to come over so I can be ready for you."

If you like, you can go more into graphic detail of the things he did and you where forced to do.

Whatever happens, only leave one message. If he likes what happened, he'll come around. However, I wouldn't wait forever.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 8

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 11:53:43 AM

dcnovice

Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline

Might a thank-you note be a nonthreatening way to make contact?

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

(in reply to FangsNfeet)

Post #: 9

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 3:17:38 PM

ehlovindom

Posts: 248
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dublingirl38

Hi all. I recently met and played with a Dom for the weekend, do i wait until he contacts me again or will i appear all needy if i am totally available to Him? when he stayed for the weekend he slept in the spare bedroom for both nights which i think is a tad weird.. is that normal also?

Let's see....you recently played with a Dom (I will assume you don't mean monopoly) and it has been HOW LONG since you have spoken? If it is an hour, I would say it is best not to contact him. If it has been a week, why wouldn't you contact him. If it has been a month, I think you are going to have to find someone else to play monopoly with.

As for sleeping in the spare bedroom, how messy was your bed?

_____________________________

Know which bridge to build, which one to cross, and which one to burn!

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 10

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 5:40:13 PM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

Might a thank-you note be a nonthreatening way to make contact?

That's what I just said.

Thank you for comming over. Thank you for making me a submissive to you. Thank you for having me bound, spanked, and swollow your cum. The suffering you had me endure gave me pleasure. Please Sir, may I have another? Your memory has me horny. Please Sir, may I have some more?

Send something along these lines, but with more detail, and see what happens.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to dcnovice)

Post #: 11

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 7:30:56 PM

SexyBlackMan2

Posts: 108
Status: offline

Serious red flag!

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 12

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 7:33:33 PM

grlneedstolearn

Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline

i would not have had him sleep over for the first meeting. Somewhere public and just getting to know each other would have been my idea. i'd message him and let him know what you thought about it, honestly, and see where it goes from there. But i would never allow someone to sleep over on the first meeting.

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 13

RE: do i contact him - 10/6/2007 8:52:28 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

I dont see where it says it was the first meeting. Maybe he lives in another location? Maybe it was arranged as just a weekend thing? This information is available to the poster however. I would go with your gut, a thank you note as suggested might be a good approach if you decide to contact him.
l

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 14

RE: do i contact him - 10/7/2007 4:18:42 AM

Lucius

Posts: 80
Joined: 6/13/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

Might a thank-you note be a nonthreatening way to make contact?

Sounds like a great idea.

Let Him know how appreciated He is.

Then see if He responds.

Lucius Alexander

House of the Palindromedary

(in reply to dcnovice)

Post #: 15

RE: do i contact him - 10/7/2007 7:43:21 AM

swtnsparkling

Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Might a thank-you note be a nonthreatening way to make contact?

Might a thank you from him be in order and polite ?concidering he stayed the weekend at her place

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please

(in reply to dcnovice)

Post #: 16

RE: do i contact him - 10/7/2007 7:58:17 AM

daddysliloneds

Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dublingirl38

Hi all. I recently met and played with a Dom for the weekend, do i wait until he contacts me again or will i appear all needy if i am totally available to Him? when he stayed for the weekend he slept in the spare bedroom for both nights which i think is a tad weird.. is that normal also?

hmmmmmm, not sure what part you're asking about being normal; you allowing a complete stranger to stay at your home for the weekend, or him being a gentleman by sleeping in the spare room ?(because perhaps he was waiting for an invitation to sleep in your room)

when i have had a good time with someone, i'm always sure to let them know it, even if it means i contact them first; it has nothing to do with neediness and everything to do with telling people how you feel when you feel it!

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 17

RE: do i contact him - 10/7/2007 8:07:43 AM

sundownhawk

Posts: 151
Joined: 8/17/2007
Status: offline

quote:

Hi all. I recently met and played with a Dom for the weekend, do i wait until he contacts me again or will i appear all needy if i am totally available to Him? when he stayed for the weekend he slept in the spare bedroom for both nights which i think is a tad weird.. is that normal also?

ORIGINAL: Dublingirl38

Have you initiated contact in the past? Was it acceptable to him for you to initiate contact? If so then contact him, if not wait.
What type of "play" was involved? Was there sex involved? Maybe him choosing to stay in the other room at night was to avoid intimacy for some reason. Too many details missing from there for an informed opinion I feel, follow your own mind on that. Just remember to step back and consider it from several perspectives.

_____________________________

The number one job of the dominant is to continually seduce consent from the bottom. ~Joseph W. Bean~

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 18

RE: do i contact him - 10/7/2007 10:29:06 AM

slaverosebeauty

Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
Status: offline

This sounds like a kink version of, 'do I call or don't I call' in the vanilla world. Call him if you want too. If you want to see him again, call him; him sleeping in the spare room is something I have not had any experience with, since any man I meet who is not local has to stay in a hotel, since I DO have a child and unless that man is a regular fixture in both or lives, he is NOT staying with us.

I have called men after they came and saw me, to say thank you for coming to see me and then leaving things in their court an I sorted out my own thoughts and we were able to talk.

_____________________________

http://slaverosebeauty.livejournal.com/

"Friends live on in our hearts, regardless if they are here or not."

(in reply to Dublingirl38)

Post #: 19

RE: do i contact him - 10/7/2007 10:34:15 PM

Dublingirl38

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline

Thanks for the replies folks and the words of wisdom.... first off he did travel to see me second off he had booked into a hotel but it ended up him staying here for one reason or another,, and he has contacted me again smiles* he is flying over again next weekend.. xx

Hugs and kisses all
dg

(in reply to slaverosebeauty)

Post #: 20

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