Odd Situation, some help? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

CollegeSub09 -> Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 9:28:01 AM)

New girlfriend.  Great match, already discussed our preferences as far as power exchange goes.  

She likes to be in control and i'm a sub, excellent.  She likes to deny me and initiate sex, great.  

Now the problem -- her fantasy is a rape scene fantasy, and also to be objectified during sex.  I have no problem taking the dominate role in the bedroom, but it is hard to do it when only she initiates sex.  How can i make her feel the most vulnerable during sex, even though she ultimately has control?  It's like she's a top that is dropping... can anyone help me push her as far down as i can?  



RCdc -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 9:39:56 AM)

I would ask how she defines being objecified.  There could be two thoughts - an object to be used and abused like a fuck toy - or objectified in a goddess way - disassociating the person from something much higher, much deeper, like a deity - that way maintaining the power and control, yet still 'used' and vulnerable to earthly thoughts.  The line between objectification and worship can be very fine indeed.
 
Peace
the.dark.



toservez -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 9:41:10 AM)

One idea, would it work for both of you if she told you ahead of the time either that day or some time period before to take her roughly by surprise?

In terms of objectifying her during sex, talk with her and see what she likes in that area. Not two people are a like. Certain positions for example feel more objectified then others. For me personally in your situation where she initiates things the atmosphere which can go a long way toward objectification is obviously not there. That leaves the actions that the other person engaging would have to make me feel truly just like I could be any woman or the person had zero concerns about my pleasure.

Again I would just ask her what makes her feel objectified and go from there.



RubberWitch -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 9:51:53 AM)

Ideas that spring to mind.
1.
buy weak rope.
She ties you down, does what she wants to you, teases you about all the things you could do to her if you got loose. she is in control, she has initiated it. If you break out, and can... well, rape her. and afterwards, she can always point out you only escaped because she tied the knots so slackly.

2.
Buy strong pills
She retires to bed early, lets you know she's taking a couple of heavy sleeping pills. you go up half an hour later, rape her. film it. she can enjoy rewatching. or alternatively, she can not take the pills, and completely enjoy trying to fight you off whilst you attack her. again, this is done at her instigation (she lets you know she's going up)




CollegeSub09 -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 10:07:30 AM)

Rubberwitch!  Great ideas!!

I really like the first one!  That would fit our situation perfectly... she likes to be in control but for me to take over when she has "complete" control and "rape" her would be amazing.  Thank you!   The second idea would also work well, as waking her in her sleep to have sex with her and tell her that i'm only doing it because I feel like it would make her go crazy. 

In response to the others i usually treat her like she's just a fuck toy and i just have sex with her for the physical pleasure on my own part (that is the form of objectification she likes), she screams :)

Any other specific ideas like Rubberwitch's?  I want to give her plenty of surprises :)



Prinsexx -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 10:42:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CollegeSub09

She likes to be in control and i'm a sub, excellent.  She likes to deny me and initiate sex, great.  

Now the problem -- her fantasy is a rape scene fantasy, and also to be objectified during sex.  I have no problem taking the dominate role in the bedroom,


Then you are both switches.....there are four of you in this relationship....when you are both in sub mode nothing will happen you will feel stuck....when you are both in dom mode you will fight....
timing is everything.



RubberWitch -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 1:29:39 PM)

ah, one big thing! have something that makes you feel toppy. a ring, a mask.. something you can reach for when you are playing these scenes. Trust me. a nice little act of artificial disassociation goes a long way to keeping this in a handlable state.



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 3:53:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx
Then you are both switches.....there are four of you in this relationship....when you are both in sub mode nothing will happen you will feel stuck....when you are both in dom mode you will fight....
timing is everything.


That's not necessarily true at all.  In the rare times that my partner and I find ourselves 'on the same side of the fence' we findp lenty to enjoy together- just not something particularly kink play based.

As well, multiple dom and multiple sub relationships work all the time.



bipolarber -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 5:01:07 PM)

Here's a suggestion, and I know it's not for everyone... but if you use a hood of some type, it does wonders for turning someone into just a "body" for use... It doesn't have to be anything elaborate, they sell these "faceless" hoods for Halloween... add a gag to this, a little bondage, and she will be out of control and an object to you. Just be sure to agree on a non-verbal safeword signal...



Lordandmaster -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 5:28:08 PM)

Umm, no, there are TWO of them in this relationship.  They're not schizzoid just because they have diverse sexual desires.

But I do think CollegeSub needs to talk to his girlfriend about how she expects him to rape and objectify her when she's always the one who initiates sex.  If she's mature enough, she'll be able to discuss it with him openly.

Oh, and for skeptics: of course it's possible for a domme to have a rape fantasy.  If she's in charge of how it unfolds, she's dominating the action.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

Then you are both switches.....there are four of you in this relationship....when you are both in sub mode nothing will happen you will feel stuck....when you are both in dom mode you will fight....
timing is everything.



spankmepink11 -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 7:03:45 PM)

To the OP, i  agree that RubberWitch has some great suggestions, however LordandMaster is  also correct in that your  dominant gf should tell you how she would like this done. 

I have a dear friend who is completely dominant, however he likes to be topped on occasion.  We have plans to be together at some time in the future and while neither of us consider ourselves switches he has specifically told me how he would expect me to top him.  Again, i don't identify as a switch at all but to be honest, our conversations about it have been incredibly hot....the key is in remembering that i would still be doing his bidding, and he is still in total control of the situation. It's just another way for me to be the tool from which he gains pleasure.



CollegeSub09 -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 9:27:43 PM)

I have talked to her and understand what she wants done -- she even told me she wants to be slapped in the face and showed me how hard.  We really delved into it to make sure it would give Her the maximum pleasure. 

I am just looking for ways to keep it interesting for her and to maximize her feeling of being a sex-toy or just a sex slave, during penetration.  I personally think it's fun that my job as her sub is to create a rape scene and take control.  We are both satisfied in that she feels like she's being used to my pleasure, but i have told her to make me pull out when she has had her share from time to time so that i never know if i'm going to be allowed release; that greatly appeals to my sub side :)

I like the hood idea, i will definitely give that a shot.



CuriousLord -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 9:50:59 PM)

Hey.. just to warn you..

quote:

ORIGINAL:  RubberWitch

Buy strong pills
She retires to bed early, lets you know she's taking a couple of heavy sleeping pills. you go up half an hour later, rape her. film it. she can enjoy rewatching. or alternatively, she can not take the pills, and completely enjoy trying to fight you off whilst you attack her. again, this is done at her instigation (she lets you know she's going up)


This is a neat idea.. but it's very, very dangerous.  If she, for some reason, freaks out- which, let's be honest, she's dominant and this is an experimental rape bit that she may be unable to predict her emotions on- OR you two have a rough break up..  she can take this video straight to the cops, claim you date-raped her, and you'd be in jail.

The law is NOT kink-friendly.  To them, this would be a video-taped rape.. they'd have you pinned on the crime with evidence you took yourself.  There'd be no getting out of it.

Therefore, I strongly recommend not taking this option. 



RRafe -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/15/2007 10:54:42 PM)

This is one of my faves that seems to gross out most of this crowd-but you did say push down deep. I used to do wierd medical/institutional sorts of use scenes that some girls used to seem to get off on. I'd do a bind spread eagle on the bed face down. Soft leather cuffs, rope is a bad adea for this length of time-at least a few hours. You fold sheets, and drape her like they do for surgery-with just the ass showing. Head too, she can still breathe-but not see anything. Last thing I would do,is to grease the asshole-maybe leave a disposable diaper under-pulled up between the legs-but not fastened.

Then go do something else for a while...leaving the girl to think about "what next?"



RubberWitch -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/16/2007 12:08:11 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

Hey.. just to warn you..

The law is NOT kink-friendly.  To them, this would be a video-taped rape.. they'd have you pinned on the crime with evidence you took yourself.  There'd be no getting out of it.

Therefore, I strongly recommend not taking this option. 


Just as long as the cuddles afterwards are also taped, and you keep a copy of it yourself, showing it to be just 'games' then it helps..

nice avi by the way, expect an invite to LOH soon



CollegeSub09 -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/16/2007 7:14:56 AM)

i dont know if she'd be up for the sleeping pill thing, as she may be too tired to enjoy it with the effects of those kicking in.

As for the drape thing, i like that... i could leave her for a few minutes at a time then do something to her here and there, thank you!



RRafe -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/16/2007 7:22:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CollegeSub09

i dont know if she'd be up for the sleeping pill thing, as she may be too tired to enjoy it with the effects of those kicking in.

As for the drape thing, i like that... i could leave her for a few minutes at a time then do something to her here and there, thank you!


YW,I think the whole bit with the disposable is-it kinda makes em think they might be there for a while.[;)]

Then again, I like objectification and sex toy scenes.



dawntreader -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/16/2007 2:13:30 PM)

Greetings Rrafe,
 
You are quite a wicked mind! It is the unknowing that is the undoing~



RRafe -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/16/2007 2:15:35 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: dawntreader

Greetings Rrafe,
 
You are quite a wicked mind! It is the unknowing that is the undoing~


Is not imagination the key to other imaginations?

"click"[;)]



RRafe -> RE: Odd Situation, some help? (10/16/2007 2:39:55 PM)

So anyhow, there you are, lying on the bed,  just enough slack in the bonds to keep from cramping. You cannot get loose,no matter how you struggle. Your butt cheeks still tingle from hard  unexpected spanking. And then he pulled the damned diaper up and TAPED the effing thing on tight-it felt like sandpaper. An hour later, you started to complain about needing to pee,and he said nothing.......just pulled the sheet from your feet, and tickled you till you lost it into the diaper. Bastard. You hear him playing a video game in the next room, and he's ignoring you.

bastard! bastard! bastard!-the diaper is getting *cold*.
 
 Finally he comes back in, and takes the damned thing off. What's going to happen next?



Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875