quote:

ORIGINAL: Tigrita

Ever consider communication before punishment?  Not every limit can be defined by pen and paper going into a relationship.  Perhaps this is a limit she did not realize she had or anticipate, or it is outside the realm of the relationship dynamic she thought she was agreeing to.  It deserves to be discussed before the bridges of communication are torn down with a whip in my opinion.  If something unanticipated comes up that is deeply emotionally destructive to someone and to the way they feel the relationship dynamic that they entered (based on that dynamic) it serves no one's interest to ignore or worse punish those reactions.  That won't solve it.  Communication is critical to keep it healthy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilshortyslave

after trying to discuss the issue with My Master, all He said was "It doesnt matter, i asked you to do something and you didnt do it, therefore you were punished"

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper

I've not yet discussed it with My Pet, but if we were to add another "toy" for the night (or longer) I'd wan the pecking order to be Me > My Pet > New Thing.  I don't think I'd have My Pet try and dominate me, so this pertains solely to My Pet dominating a new member.

True, My Pet (as with most other submissives) don't get much training in the art and science of domination, but I would expect my orders to stand.  I would be extremely clear in my orders.  I rarely, if ever, inspire her to repeat stock answers or follow my orders like a robot.  I like her to take my commands and do them with some wonderment sprinkled about.  When she is new to a task I give her every last bit of information she'd ever need.  It would take months, maybe years, for My Pet to not need very precise orders.  I would essentially be dominating New Thing (That's his or her name, now) by proxy. "She gave an awfully rude response, My Pet.  Spit on her cheek and slap her across the face."  It would still be fun, but technically My Pet is not dominating New Thing.  I'm simply delegating.

Would I punish My Pet for not following an order that involved disciplining a (consenual) third party? Yes.  Again, I'd be patient, as she is an novice in domination, but over time I would become less tolerant of lag.  The same is true of all disciplines I require.

Returning to my previous statement: "I don't think I'd have My Pet try and dominate me" I believe some people can be switches and some cannot.  Particularly in 24-7 relationships, switching changes a lot of things.  It isn't abnormal for a dominant to have some manner of interest in submission, but there are ways to deal with that without making anyone a victim. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilshortyslave

ok just to clarify He asked me to Dominate him, i would like to thank all those who have helped me with this problem.
maybe i did deserve my punishment but in my mind, to tell a slave, who is a second generation slave, to suddenly Dominate, of which the slave has absolutely no experience doing so.
after trying to discuss the issue with My Master, all He said was "It doesnt matter, i asked you to do something and you didnt do it, therefore you were punished"
i dont agree with what he said but at the risk of being whipped again i held my tongue.
i dont want to seem as if im complaining, im only voicing my opinion and its up to the people who reads if it matters or not.

quote:

Not every limit can be defined by pen and paper going into a relationship.  Perhaps this is a limit she did not realize she had or anticipate, or it is outside the realm of the relationship dynamic she thought she was agreeing to.  It deserves to be discussed before the bridges of communication are torn down with a whip in my opinion.  If something unanticipated comes up that is deeply emotionally destructive to someone and to the way they feel the relationship dynamic that they entered (based on that dynamic) it serves no one's interest to ignore or worse punish those reactions.  That won't solve it.  Communication is critical to keep it healthy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilshortyslave

ok just to clarify He asked me to Dominate him, i would like to thank all those who have helped me with this problem.
maybe i did deserve my punishment but in my mind, to tell a slave, who is a second generation slave, to suddenly Dominate, of which the slave has absolutely no experience doing so.
after trying to discuss the issue with My Master, all He said was "It doesnt matter, i asked you to do something and you didnt do it, therefore you were punished"
i dont agree with what he said but at the risk of being whipped again i held my tongue.
i dont want to seem as if im complaining, im only voicing my opinion and its up to the people who reads if it matters or not.