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Collars - 10/19/2007 7:20:33 AM

SirMichealspeach

Posts: 73
Joined: 1/13/2006
Status: offline

I know this has been asked over and over but i wanted to just throw something out there and see what happens... Master recently has taken a submissive under His protection, mainly because she is coming off a bad relationship and is not wanting to go to functions/events alone. He has made it clear to her that He is not looking to permantly make her part of our family (at this point anyway).We both adore her and don't want to see her get taken advantage of while she is recovering from this break up. We are going to a Halloween function next weekend and she has ask to wear a physical collar so as to not appear alone in a crowded place, while i understand her reasoning for asking this, i have this gut intuition that there is an alteria(sp) motive of some kind, like maybe wanting to flaunt this collar to the ex (who will also be at this function) . Master has told her He will consider her request but has not made a decesion as yet. my question is this: If He decides to grant her request, should the collar be one that she purchases so she doesn't feel as if He is "placing " a collar on her , or should Master purchase one for her to wear anytime we go to events/ functions together until she either finds a new Dom or decides she no longer wants His protection?
Sorry for being long winded and i sincerly hope i don't get flamed for this thread.. this is a real delima(sp) and i just want to understand and be able to communicate with Master properly on all the pros anc cons of this decesion.
thanks in advance for any advice.
Sir Micheals peach

Post #: 1

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 7:25:38 AM

Wildfleurs

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMichealspeach

I know this has been asked over and over but i wanted to just throw something out there and see what happens... Master recently has taken a submissive under His protection, mainly because she is coming off a bad relationship and is not wanting to go to functions/events alone. He has made it clear to her that He is not looking to permantly make her part of our family (at this point anyway).We both adore her and don't want to see her get taken advantage of while she is recovering from this break up. We are going to a Halloween function next weekend and she has ask to wear a physical collar so as to not appear alone in a crowded place, while i understand her reasoning for asking this, i have this gut intuition that there is an alteria(sp) motive of some kind, like maybe wanting to flaunt this collar to the ex (who will also be at this function) . Master has told her He will consider her request but has not made a decesion as yet. my question is this: If He decides to grant her request, should the collar be one that she purchases so she doesn't feel as if He is "placing " a collar on her , or should Master purchase one for her to wear anytime we go to events/ functions together until she either finds a new Dom or decides she no longer wants His protection?
Sorry for being long winded and i sincerly hope i don't get flamed for this thread.. this is a real delima(sp) and i just want to understand and be able to communicate with Master properly on all the pros anc cons of this decesion.
thanks in advance for any advice.
Sir Micheals peach

What about having her purchase a collar that she puts on herself?

C~

_____________________________

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The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
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Post #: 2

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 7:29:08 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs
What about having her purchase a collar that she puts on herself?

seconds this....that way there is no emotional attachment to him thru the collar or the collaring action....

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to Wildfleurs)

Post #: 3

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 7:33:56 AM

SirMichealspeach

Posts: 73
Joined: 1/13/2006
Status: offline

Thank You both..this is also my thought.

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 4

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 7:50:36 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMichealspeach
We are going to a Halloween function next weekend and she has ask to wear a physical collar so as to not appear alone in a crowded place,

This is actually what worries me. Perhaps she's not reasy to go out in public if she's afraid that she might possibly appear alone. Really, all she has to do is hang with you and she won't be alone. As far as unwanted attention, jut say no.

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(in reply to SirMichealspeach)

Post #: 5

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:12:27 AM

Maya2001

Posts: 1656
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
Status: offline

Having a collar would make her appear to have ownership, why would she need if she has a protector? I would think that wearing a collar would be wrong in this case as it would be misleading to others an indicate a relationship that does not exist and if allowed would make your Sir a partner in the dishonesty, this is just my personal opinion, as I am not sure if collars of protection exist

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Post #: 6

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:21:52 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

i collar myself at public events, all the way from local munches to international contests/events because i don't like trolls...and people that actually talk to me and get to know me a little bit figure that out real quick...is there anything wrong with that? i don't think so...and i've never heard anyone i respect say anything different...the collar i use is a pink leather collar with rhinestones and a pink jingle bell attached to the front that snaps on...its not a big heavy leather collar or a chain that locks on...and it fits my kitty persona...so its a little different, it doesn't scream "i'm owned"....but its still a collar and its good at warning off the trolls, haven't been trolled once wearing it, and been trolled plenty while not wearing it...so..i'll keep wearing it...and protecting myself...and if anything gets out of hand, i know bigger and badder people than the trolls...and they are on my side..

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

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Post #: 7

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:22:35 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

I agree with bobbi. If she is worried of being taken advantage of at an event just because she hasn't a collar on, she really is not ready to attend and shouldn't go. You will be with her and look after her with your Master, that in my mind should be enough.

Again, if your Master does accept her request, buying and putting it on herself is a good option - but not the best one - the best one is not having it or going at all.

Peace
the.dark.

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RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to SirMichealspeach)

Post #: 8

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:29:28 AM

GhitaAmati

Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline

several years ago I worked for a man who built dungeon furniture and we often traveled around to fetish parties around the state to advertise stuff and set up the things he built to be used at the parties....I can definantly understand her desire to not want to appear "available" but then again I dont know her and I dont know where that desire ultimatly stems from. Being constantly seen as an uncollared female at a fetish party got to be such a drag that I bought myself a fairly hefty leather collar with a few D rings on it and placed it on my own neck whenever we went out. It helped quite a bit, sometimes Id have people ask who I belonged to and Id just say "oh he isnt here tonight" or actually for a while there we lied and said I belonged to one of the other guys I worked with, that way he solved the same issue of being a "single" guy there even though he was married and vanilla....hey, when a job pays well you deal with it...even if it aint really your thing. However, if the truth is that she really doesnt "belong" to your master, a collar may ultimatly give off the wrong signals too. If she is going to the party with the two of you, I dont see why being in the two of you's company isnt enough to not be seen as "alone" unless she really thinks she ought to be seen as being in a committed relationship and if this really is as soon after a break up as it seems, I think she'd probably get worse PR for that than going with a bare neck.....

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(in reply to Maya2001)

Post #: 9

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:31:26 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

I question why or how wearing a piece of leather around your neck helps you with trolls. Why not just say "I'm not interested?" Why not politely walk away from an uncomfortable conversation. Or better yet, if unable to function in an adult environment, why bother going in the first place? I'm surprised that people who think highly of collars aren't in this thread being upset over the misuse of the symbol.

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(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 10

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:54:14 AM

CrazyC

Posts: 949
Joined: 9/28/2006
Status: offline

I would follow your instincts. If your gut is saying something is up, it probably is. It all seems kind of odd. The last thing i want to look like when a bf and i broke up was taken again right away. I personally liked dressing up (it was a halloween party) and making my ex realize what he was missing out on while i flirted with every other guy. (Ok, so that might not have been the most healthy thing, but it felt soooooo good.)

From the point of view of third person, I would think others who don't know the dynamic of your relationship will think more of it then just a collar of protection. And like other's said, if her motive is to protect her from getting attention from other doms then she shouldn't go. I don't want to sound like I don't want her to have any fun. Halloween is the best time for that, but she needs to be able to say "no" on her own when it's time for her to go out.

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(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 11

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:57:59 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied
I question why or how wearing a piece of leather around your neck helps you with trolls.

i know you weren't asking me...but i just had to throw my two cents in...when people do actually take time to ask me...i tell them its because kitties shouldn't be out in public without a collar on or else they'll get picked up by animal control....

not sure why its such a big deterent to trolls...but it is...

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 12

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 8:59:04 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMichealspeach

I know this has been asked over and over but i wanted to just throw something out there and see what happens... Master recently has taken a submissive under His protection, mainly because she is coming off a bad relationship and is not wanting to go to functions/events alone. He has made it clear to her that He is not looking to permantly make her part of our family (at this point anyway).We both adore her and don't want to see her get taken advantage of while she is recovering from this break up. We are going to a Halloween function next weekend and she has ask to wear a physical collar so as to not appear alone in a crowded place, while i understand her reasoning for asking this, i have this gut intuition that there is an alteria(sp) motive of some kind, like maybe wanting to flaunt this collar to the ex (who will also be at this function) . Master has told her He will consider her request but has not made a decesion as yet. my question is this: If He decides to grant her request, should the collar be one that she purchases so she doesn't feel as if He is "placing " a collar on her , or should Master purchase one for her to wear anytime we go to events/ functions together until she either finds a new Dom or decides she no longer wants His protection?
Sorry for being long winded and i sincerly hope i don't get flamed for this thread.. this is a real delima(sp) and i just want to understand and be able to communicate with Master properly on all the pros anc cons of this decesion.
thanks in advance for any advice.
Sir Micheals peach

Sounds like your guy is typical. Possibly he is being used by the other woman...So she can torment her ex....Why the need to place her "under protection" is she in harms way? Your guy sounds sounds like a bit of a douche...

Now I could understand putting her "under protection" if I thought I might be able to wrangle some good, ol' fashioned, hot, gal on gal pussy eating...Or if I thought she might make a good replacement for you. Otherwise I would tell her to buzz off or she is welcome to hang out...In order to find out if we were compatible.

Anything else is just kind of creepy....The whole collaring thang kind of wigs me out as well. The damn concept just isn't necessary as far as I am concerned. ...But to each their own regarding this matter....I just was one who never really "dug" herd mentality.

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Post #: 13

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 9:00:25 AM

LATEXBABY64

Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline

sometimes it is best we face things with out the protection of those around us. IT makes us stronger and better. being afraid of what is around us can often hinder our growth path. It is best we face things and work through them

(in reply to CrazyC)

Post #: 14

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 9:38:32 AM

SirMichealspeach

Posts: 73
Joined: 1/13/2006
Status: offline

i really apprciate everyones advice. i do belive that she wants to attend the party and have fun, she is not new to the lifestyle and understands that while she will be in Our company she will not be alone, she wants the physical collar not to appear owned but to appear with someone, she will not be under protocol to ask to speak ot scene with anyone there but will have the knowledge that if something or someone bothers or makes her uncomfortable she can come to Us and be protected.
to domiguy: how could you call someones Sir a douche when You know absolutly nothing about Him? He is not looking to replace me or wrangle anything from this girl. she has been a friend of mine and has been to several functions with us a couple with her previous Dom. I don't see how anyone could interpret Him wanting to be a friend and look after her in a public place as wrong or Him haveing an alterior motive. as you said "to each His own"

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)

Post #: 15

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 10:37:30 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMichealspeach

Master recently has taken a submissive under His protection, mainly because she is coming off a bad relationship and is not wanting to go to functions/events alone. He has made it clear to her that He is not looking to permantly make her part of our family (at this point anyway).We both adore her and don't want to see her get taken advantage of while she is recovering from this break up.

quote:

SirMichaelspeach
to domiguy: how could you call someones Sir a douche when You know absolutly nothing about Him? He is not looking to replace me or wrangle anything from this girl. she has been a friend of mine and has been to several functions with us a couple with her previous Dom. I don't see how anyone could interpret Him wanting to be a friend and look after her in a public place as wrong or Him haveing an alterior motive. as you said "to each His own"

Okay...These are the questions I would ask....Since there is a possibility she is doing this only for spite then why appease her in giving this woman the almighty "COLLAR OF PROTECTION?" Is this woman so dumb that she can't determine who to get involved with? Doesn't sound like someone I would want to hang out with.....Again, to each their own in who we choose to socialize with....

"At this point anyway" a rather open ended statement...Which would elude to the possibility of something more down the road....Beware the incoming Trojan Horse....I would seriously recommend that you take a peek down it's throat....It has happened frequently where the Trojan's end up nesting while your bags are being packed.

I am a member of not only "The Protectors", a not for profit organization based out of Minneapolis, but also I have championed a secret society known as "The Guy Police" I can smell guy b.s. from a mile away....Since we all realize that collars of protection are bullshit...What does your guy get out of it? Being nice?....Bullshit!!! If your guy actually does not possess an "Ulterior" motive (Which he most certainly does) then he should be at least wise enough to realize that she might, and ignore her request.

This is some solid advice....Tell your friend that you are sorry for her break-up and her lack of utilizing sound judgment....Tell her to stay away from places where she might be tempted to "interact" till she gets her shit together because at this point it appears she is incapable of stepping "outside" without potentially causing herself grave bodily harm....Tell her the only reason your guy would ever consider collaring her would be in the hopes to watch you two fuck, to have control over two mouths, four tits, two twats and a-holes, or to replace your ass altogether....

Is she hotter than you?

I can live with the term "douche" ....But you, unfortunately, are the one who actually has to do it.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 10/19/2007 11:04:43 AM >

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Post #: 16

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 10:49:59 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

domi, you know that collars of protection provide awesome powers. Believe.

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- Albert Einstein

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 17

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 10:54:17 AM

MsBearlee

Posts: 1032
Joined: 2/15/2006
Status: offline

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A must read for submissives! (click here)

This one, as well!

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Post #: 18

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 12:48:27 PM

Estring

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

The op is 47 years old so I am assuming that everyone involved in this story is around the same age. What the hell is the problem? Just go to the Halloween party and have a good time. Why do so many situations read like high school on here?

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Post #: 19

RE: Collars - 10/19/2007 1:03:29 PM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

Why do so many situations read like high school on here?

Because of the maturity level of the posters?

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“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Estring)

Post #: 20

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