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Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 4:18:34 PM   
JLION


Posts: 25
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		I have taken an interest in helping my subs reduce their bad habits while increase their good habits. I like to concentrate on rewarding achievements, such as if a sedentary sub exercises. I also like limiting my subs bad habits, such as cigarette and alcohol. I do not know what techniques most doms and dommes  use to shape such every day behavior, so I am interested in some feedback. I personally rely on positive enforcement primarily, with a little bit of negative reinforcement/punishment interweaved. I know many prefer to just punish the sub for acting bad, and I do not know how that works. I do know that according to A.B.A. (applied behavior analysis) therapy, the therapist concentrates on rewarding the good and ignoring the bad. I am very interested in hearing other people’s opinions and experiences relating to shaping every day behavior/habits, and general self-improvement through BDSM. Thanks, JLION.
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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 4:30:05 PM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		um when are you getting yours

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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 4:35:34 PM   
came4U


Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline
quote:

I also like limiting my subs bad habits, such as cigarette and alcohol.


Since when is allowing someone a smoke and a drink as reward showing positive reinforcement or any sort of self-improvement. 

One would think that banishment for those habits would remind the sub that it will not be tolerated.

Why would something so unhealthy be even considered as a reward. If it is a reward, it only teaches positivity towards things that are unnecessary evils. no? 

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)
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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 4:43:21 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		you have to becareful in getting your personal and professional (or what you have a degree or education in or training in....not really sure what a background in means..but gonna go with professional for the sake of brevity) lives mixed up...a doctors wife doesn't want their husband always diagnosing them, a lawyers wife doesn't always want their husband's legal advice, and a cpa's wife doesn't always want their husbands advice on what to do with her money anymore than someone who's with someone who's trained in a psychological field wants to be psychoanalyzed all the time and constantly feel like they are in therapy...yes, your knowledge can give you some helpful insite...but learn boundaries...its actually basic ethics....you wouldn't date one of your patients....don't let your date become one of your patients....

chelle


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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 4:53:24 PM   
came4U


Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline 		I agree. I never thought of it that way Chelle,

That brings up the question of if the educational level within the field of psychology/sociology is announced then when does it become behavior manipulation in the form of behavior-modification. It is a fine line of doing what is best vs doing something just for the experimentation process to see what goods or evils you draw forth.

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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 4:57:51 PM   
JLION


Posts: 25
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks for the feedback. I might have been unclear.
I do not allow smoking or any type of stimulant as a reward.
I reward them for refraining from them.
I do not force them to banish it immeditaely, since I do not believe in cold-turkey. I do believe in systematically controlling intake with the goal of the elimination of the habit. For example, 5 cigarettes a day for the first week, then 4... etc.

That is a very good point, that it is not good to mix in profession at home. I honestly never thought of it that way. I guess the good thing is I do not go too deep into it, and I try to keep it to simple things such as: smoking, eating habits, exercise, hygiene, etc. It would be dangerous for a psychologist to use their sub as an experiment for some kind of BDSM/psychoanalysis therapy.. since there you might hit some deep things.

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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 5:05:01 PM   
came4U


Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline 		Right, there is a point when a certain number of years in a study field such as psychology can easily cause a sub be used as 'mindfuk' fodder.

Deeper issues should be in the hands of professionals that you aren't sleeping with and who have only mind-safe intent for every step in the analysis process.

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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 5:07:40 PM   
Invictus754


Posts: 521
Joined: 12/16/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JLION
I do know that according to A.B.A. (applied behavior analysis) therapy, the therapist concentrates on rewarding the good and ignoring the bad.


Variable reinforcement is the key.  This is an article on training dogs using variable reinforcement, but it should work on any animal with a spark of intelligence.

http://life.familyeducation.com/dogs/pet-training/47297.html?page=2&detoured=1

Remember also, however - negative reinforcement is also needed.  Spare the rod and spoil the child. 

< Message edited by Invictus754 -- 10/20/2007 5:09:16 PM >

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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 5:59:45 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Are they abusing alcohol?  Or unable to be reasonably mature when under the influence?  Otherwise, I'm not sure why you'd want to limit it, but if so, just tell her no more than two drinks in a day and only with permission.

Smoking, well I'd say she first has to want to quit on her own.  Without that, forget it.  If she does want to quit, then get her some good prescription drugs out now to help her through it and quit cold turkey.

Other general things- it's best to break habits down into behavior patterns, disrupt the pattern of thought which leads to the action, lead to a new action, repeat, reinforce, repeat, reinforce.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 6:27:13 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JLION
I also like limiting my subs bad habits, such as cigarette and alcohol. I do not know what techniques most doms and dommes  use to shape such every day behavior, so I am interested in some feedback. I personally rely on positive enforcement primarily, with a little bit of negative reinforcement/punishment interweaved.

I think it's good that you seem sincere in your efforts and seem to genuinely want to encourage positive behavior and not find "excuses" to punish.  This may sound a bit simplistic but my Master relies on just telling me what He expects.  He will not tolerate drug or alcohol abuse as He and I have both had our own issues in those areas.  Any other "bad" behaviors He won't tolerate, He just makes it clear.  He tells me what I can and cannot partake of and I obey.  Sounds rather simple, but it's what works for us.  He doesn't have to "re-train" or "deprogram" or anything like that.  He just spells out His expectations and I meet them to the best of my ability.............luci

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RE: Techniques to increase good habits and reduce the bad - 10/20/2007 6:33:37 PM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline 		I screen people I date to see if they have bad habits.

Only the ones with small bad habits make it past that-the others get told "no thanks."

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