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Birth Order of Children - 10/23/2007 12:44:13 PM   
KenDckey


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  BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN
  
1st baby:You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby:You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby:Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

_____________________________________________________

Preparing for the Birth:

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.

3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

______________________________________________________

The Layette:

1st  baby: You pre -wash newborn's clothes, colour-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

______________________________________________________

Worries:

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.

3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

______________________________________________________

Pacifier:

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you c an go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.

3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

______________________________________________________

Diapering:

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.

3rd baby:You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

_______________________________________________________

Activities:
1st baby:You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

_____________________________________________ _________

Going Out:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees  blood.

______________________________________________________

At Home:

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

3rd baby:You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

______________________________________________________

Swallowing Coins (a favorite):

1st child: When  first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you

carefully watch for the coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

______________________________________________________

GRANDCHILDREN:God's reward for allowing your children to live!






 
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RE: Birth Order of Children - 10/23/2007 12:51:32 PM   
Guest123


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Wonders about the affect of birth order upon the child... *laughs*... i'm the 13th, and first girl.... wondering now, if that's why i'm the way i am.



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RE: Birth Order of Children - 10/23/2007 3:02:23 PM   
KenDckey


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I don't know but with 12 older brothers I be afraid to date you   LOL

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RE: Birth Order of Children - 10/23/2007 4:33:21 PM   
Rushemery


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very good post!

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RE: Birth Order of Children - 10/23/2007 10:58:49 PM   
LivingInSin


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Joined: 6/12/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Guest123




Wonders about the affect of birth order upon the child... *laughs*... i'm the 13th, and first girl.... wondering now, if that's why i'm the way i am.




hells bells! id be afrad to talk to you! lol

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*Myth says that only the woman who has been an utter slave can be truly free------this is no myth*


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RE: Birth Order of Children - 10/23/2007 11:20:36 PM   
MissMagnolia


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ROFLMAO!!! Thanks Ken!

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if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.


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RE: Birth Order of Children - 10/24/2007 10:47:30 AM   
slaverosebeauty


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From: Cali
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I only have 1 and I didn't do ANY of that stuff, lol.  If i have another one though, I will keep that around for 'advice.'

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"Friends live on in our hearts, regardless if they are here or not."

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RE: Birth Order of Children - 10/24/2007 10:56:14 AM   
Guest123


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Joined: 9/6/2007
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*laughs softly*... be afraid.. .be very afraid.... *twinkles*... most of them are much older than i, and keep dying off so the buffer zone is dwindling... i should be safe to date and talk to by the time, i'm 92.... see you then? *giggles till i fall over*



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